What's the Longest It's Taken You to Get a Joke?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

When I saw Back To The Future in its first run at movie theaters, Biff1955 says to Marty at one point: “Now make like a tree… And get outta here!” That one puzzled me, but I didn’t ask anybody else what it meant.

Years later, I saw Back To The Future II in the theater on its opening weekend. In that movie, Biff1955 repeats that line to his future self, Biff2015, who smacks him on the head with his cane and says: “It’s leave! Make like a tree and leave! You sound so stupid when you get it wrong!”

I and at least 10 other people in the theater could be heard going “Ohhhh!” after that revelation.

22

Me too!

This one took me a couple of years:

The other day I shot an elephant in my pajamas. I have no idea why he was wearing my pajamas.

I still laughed, but I had no idea. Being maybe seven at the time, I just thought an elephant wearing pajamas was hilarious.

23

I’ll confess. I don’t get it.

24

There was some confusion as to whether she was adopted or not. This made their little love affair possibly less oogy.

“Hey, aren’t you my cousin?”

“Maeby!”

What went right over my head is that in one episode, she posed as her own twin sister, Shirley.

25

This never made any sense to me as as kid. It took me years to figure it out:

Joe: It’s a shame about Professor Jones disappearing so mysteriously. What a wonderful mind!
Tim: I’ll say. He was always thinking about one thing or another. The last time I saw him, he was in a boat and he suddenly shouted out “I’m thinking! I’m thinking!”
Joe: You fool! The professor lisped!

26

10 years.

Pete and Re-Pete were in a boat. Pete fell out. Who was left?
Pete and Re-Pete were in a boat. Pete fell out. Who was left?

[Ad nauseum]
When I was a kid, I thought the joke was funny because if they told you who fell out, obviously only a moron wouldn’t know who was left. So I’d tell it over and over, just because I thought that’s what you did. Sometimes Pete fell out, sometime Re-Pete fell out, sometimes both or neither of them fell out. I thought it was the funniest joke ever. Finally, I was talking about being a stupid kid one day when I thought of that joke. And suddenly it made perfect sense to me. D’oh.

27

That’s adorable!

My cousin had a favorite joke, which I don’t think he really understood.

“Hello? You don’t say, you don’t say, you don’t say, who was it, he didn’t say. He didn’t say!”

He’d deliver the last line with a little nudge nudge wink wink. He’d then tell it again. And again. And again.

28

Told to me as a kid:

Mama skunk had two kids, In & Out.
Normally In was out, and Out was in.
But one day In was in, and Out was out.
How did Mama know?

In stinked!
I thought it was funny that one of the skunks stunk and that was the joke.
The “Instinct” didn’t dawn on me until years later.

29

Has a kinda Groucho feel to it, doesn’t it? :smiley:

30

It took me decades to get “Why did the chicken cross the road,” probably because it was one of the first jokes I ever heard, and it doesn’t work unless you have heard lots of jokes before it.

I think it was a year or two ago (after about twenty years of watching and re-watching) that I got this one from Blazing Saddles:

Mayor (holding laurel wreath): I’d like to offer our new Sheriff a laurel, and hearty handshake.

31

Do you have a match?

Not since Superman died.

I could NOT wrap my head around this one. I even had people explain it to me, and I didn’t get it. I think it was about 20 years until it dawned on me.

32

Not exactly a joke, but. . .

In 1976 The Who did, “Momma’s got a squeeze box.” About a year ago I was pulling into the parking lot of a local casino to cash in on the cheap breakfast they have when it came on the radio.

It was an epiphany. Hey, it’s not really about an accordian.
A sample of the lyrics for those of you who may not be familiar with the song.

Mama’s got a squeezebox
Daddy never sleeps at night
She goes in and out and in and out and in and out and in and out
She’s playing all night
And the music’s all-tight
Mama’s got a squeeze box
Daddy never sleeps at night
She goes, squeeze me, come on and squeeze me
Come on and tease me like you do
I’m so in love with you
Mama’s got a squeeze box
Daddy never sleeps at night
I trust you will be a little quicker on the uptake than me.

33

“See you later.”

“Not if I see you first!”

When I finally figured it out, it was followed not with a laugh, but with an, “Oh.”

34

I still don’t get either of these. Help me.

35

For a university assignment, we were given the specification for a basic programming language and we had to write a compiler for it.

My friend pointed out that the language resembled a stripped-down version of the C programming language, so he decided to call his compiler “C-min”, and seemed to be very proud of his choice. I didn’t really get it, and I thought that “C–” would be a slightly more clever name (since there’s another language called C++).

A few years later I realised that “C-min” sound a bit like “semen”.

36

Famed comedy duo Laurel and Hardy.

Match as in “You’ve met your match”; your equal, the one comparable to you, etc.

37

Ditto. And I read the book in 1974, so make that almost 35 years for me too.

Part of my problem was I always pronounced the name as "Hoe-knicker’ in my head.

38

There was a MAS*H episode where some hot nurse was assigned to the camp. Hawkeye and BJ competed her her. (Wasn’t BJ married??)

They brought her a care package. Inside was shampoo, and BJ said it was because they couldn’t find any “real poo.” HA HA!! A poo joke! Poop! Ha ha!

I saw it when I was 10. I was about 38 when I realized that “sham” was part of the joke…

39

The final episode explained one that I would NEVER have gotten:

The dad’s boat was named Seaward.

(Say it out loud.)

40

There was an episode where Lucille walked in while Michael of Gob were arguing about selling the yacht.

Michael: “Get rid of the Seaward.”
Lucille: “I’ll leave when I’m good and ready.”