Something that we can all do, not just those with talent.
Hold the paper in the air. Hold the pen in your other fist. Stab the paper rapidly and repeatedly whilst shouting, “DIE! DIE! DIE!”
Well… no, no. It’s just too much fun to share.
What’s the most fun thing to do with a Pen and a piece of paper and a blonde Hooker, you ask?
No, no…wait a second…it’s something I think about every day…
Stab people with the pen, then use the blood to write eldritch symbols on the papers, to summon . . .
You will have to buy the full copy of the * Necromonicon [/I} for full details.
Take the pen apart. Discard the caps and the actual ‘pen’ part, leaving you with only a hollow plastic tube.
Tear the paper into small pieces, and chew on them until they are wet balls of mush.
Insert the ball of mush into one end of the pen, and blow on it VERY hard, shooting the mushball at a cow-orker or other nearby innocent.
Repeat until they beat the crap out of you.
Keep making repeated dots about 2-3mm from each other until you’ve filled up a page. Or do like my friend did, fill in the entire page with complete ink. Kinda messy though.
Doodle, and doodle, and then draw doodles of people commenting on the first doodles, and then doodle spaceships blowing up the critics with depthcharges, whilst being eaten by a dragon wearing a cowboy hat and revolvers. Continue as long as needed.
Fold the paper into a pterodactyl. Use the pen to draw eyes.
The pretend the pen is an airplane or skyscraper, and have the bird menacingly attack it a la Rodan.
…hey, it kept ME from getting bored in grade school.
I quite enjoy endorsing checks made out to my name.
Kon Tiki minitures
There was this game we used to play in grade-school, sort of a pen and paper version of the old classic “Battleship.”
What you’d do is, two people sit on opposite sides of, for this example, a library table. Each draws a small number of “military units” on the bottom third of the page closest to him. Soldiers, tanks, machine gun bunkers, and so on.
You agree on the number and types of units to be used ahead of time, of course. Then, when your forces are laid out, whoever you’ve decided is gonna go first, does the following.
Somewhere on ‘your’ side of the battlefield, you draw a small dot, going over it a bit so that there’s a decent amount of ink on your ‘shot.’ Then you fold the page down the middle, and rub the back of the page over your little dot with the back, or the cap, of the pen.
This transfers the ‘shot’ onto your opponent’s side of the field. He then ‘explodes’ or crosses out any units touched by the dot, and returns fire in the same way. Firing from a spot too close to one of your own forces always lead to devastating return fire, of course. Sort of like firing at an opponent’s muzzle flash in the dark, I guess.
The first one to have all his ‘units’ blasted loses.
It’s a little tough to describe without actually seeing it, but we used to while away a lot of hours with this game. What usually got us busted was the sound effects we invariably ended up making sotto voce whilst ‘blowing up’ our units.
Write a very dirty story and share it with the SO of your choice
Make a Mobius Strip and use the pen to demonstrate that there is only one side to this object!
Make one of those origami “fortune tellers.” The fun comes in when you write the fortunes inside. You say stuff like “you are a baboon.” Comedy gold!
Johnny L.A., you are my new favorite doper. I laughed for five minutes. /OT
(Damn, voguevixen, not only the same idea, but the same link. Great minds, indeed!)
Close to what I was going to say Skeezix but I always played with flick moves and shots. Although a pencil would be better, but pen is fine. There are two varieties.
Spaceship - Draw a hill at the top and a hill at the bottom. Like this.
____ | | |) (| |____|
Then on each hill draw 5 little A shaped spaceships and a flag. Fill the region between them with asteroids.
To launch a ship you put the tip of the pen on the ship and you hold the butt of the pen with a finger then with your other hand you flick the pen in the direction you want to go. The line you make is your movement and redraw your ship at the end of the line. You can play either hardcore (you hit something you die) or softcore (you hit something you stop there).
To fire simply declare that you’re firing and flick the pen the same way as how you move only this time it’s a laser blast. If you hit an enemies ship it’s toast. If you hit the enemies flag you win.
Just take turns going back and forth till the game is over.
Battlefield - This one’s much more complicated and fun. Draw a bunch of islands with bridges connecting them and fill them up with equipment. You can have soldiers and tanks. Be sure to draw an airfield so you can have airplanes. You can have subs and ships. Be sure to draw you bunker in a well defended area because that’s where you are.
Make a bunch of little rules for them like soldiers need 2 shots to take out a tank. Only airplanes can take out airplanes. Only the big airplane has the firepower to take out your bunker. Ships can only attack so far inland. Well you can make it as needlessly complicated as you want.
Oh we made so much of our own fun back in the days.
Limericks. For extra fun, have someone spot you a name, a place/city, and an occupation. Try to use at least 2 out of the 3 in your limerick.
With nought but paper and pen,
You can fill your scrivening yen.
In five concise lines,
'Round a theme that mines
The bawdiest wenches and men.
Fern Forest, now that you describe it I recall that one, or something very similar, at least.
When we were looking for ridiculous complexity in the game I described, it worked out about like yours. Each surviving unit could fire once a “round” and all units had to fire before you could start over.
This meant, of course, that when a soldier was firing, it was a small dot, versus the machine gun emplacement, which could fire a stream of five or six dots, and the tanks/mortars got a larger dot for outgoing fire, and so on and so on.
In fact, it got to the point where tanks were not out of the game unless the main turret was hit. We took it a bit too far before we gave up on the game.
As I recall (and I’m going back farther than I’d like to admit) we devloped the dots game as an alternative to flicked pencils, as you could pass the single piece of paper back and forth, and without all the pencil flicking, there was less chance of being busted playing the game during a class.