What's the stupidest statement someone around you has made?

[Savannah]

@Tikki

Back in the day before it was popular for disillusioned teens to wear big, puffy jackets, the fad was to wear no jacket at all.

I know this doesn’t count, because it was observed, not heard. I was living in Anchorage, Alaska, and it was winter. It was cold. I was cold. It was cold (okay, not Fairbanks cold, but plenty cold) enough that we had to plug the car in overnight if you wanted it to start in the morning. I’m driving in the cold, cold morning, and I see two teenagers waiting at a bus stop. No jackets. I can’t remember if they were in SHORTS or mini-skirts, but I saw BLUE legs. And yes, they were hugging themselves to keep ‘warm’.

I was in my car, in my coat, in gloves, heater on full blast, and I was still cold. These teenagers at the bus stop… no jackets, bare blue legs…

I still can’t believe they went to school like that. Teenagers are weird.

[Raguleader]

@Savannah

I still can’t believe they went to school like that. Teenagers are weird.

You just don’t understand, because unlike teenagers, you are neither invincible nor do you know everything.

[psychoanesthesia]

New guy here, love the Dope.

Anyway, here are a couple brilliant observations made during presentations in a Geosystems class a couple years back:

-Jupiter has 4 moons.

-Neptune’s diameter is 800,000 miles.

-And I think someone, by their false numerical datum, implied that Pluto was closer to the sun than Earth, or that Earth is closer than Mercury - I can’t remember.

My teacher, to the equally sharp class: “How many moons does Jupiter have? I think like, 18… isn’t it 18?”

I raise my hand: “Actually, it has 61 (it did at the time, now has 63).”

Her: “SIXTY-ONE?! I think that’s wrong.”

Me: “Nope, right here on the computer screen. Come take a look.”

some University’s page clearly states 61 satellites

Her: “I think we’ll just go with 18.”

Same teacher: After the school switched from Windows 98 to XP, I changed my desktop image, because that information is stored with the user account, not on the computer. My teacher insisted that I change it back, even after I told her it had absolutely nothing to do with that computer. &^&!

Sharp as a bowling ball, she was.

[Toaster]

My friend’s going through a Cultural Sensitivities class in college. The ‘teacher’ is a real piece of work. He’s one of those where is knows that everyone other than him is a dirty racist, especially if they’re white and male. He’s said a lot of stupid things, like ‘speaking’ in Spanish to show sensitivity to the Spanish folk in the class (he could not actually speak it). And making sure everyone knows that Americans invented all racism. My favorite/most hated: Ancient humans got to Australia from Africa really quickly because all the continents were one big continent back then.

[Dr_Garry]

@Really Not All That Bright

In Britain and much of the Middle East (the only places outside the US that I’ve had to change lightbulbs in) a “push-then-twist” locking-type mechanism is used, rather than the American screw-in style.

You know, there are two tabs on the bulb and you push them into two slots, then twist slightly, and then stop pushing and the bulb pushes the tabs back out into a “locking” slot.

They’re called “bayonet caps”. Here in Aus, both BCs and American ESs (Edison screws) are used, making buying bulbs a minor annoyance. Why the BC was invented I’ll never know. Especially in old fittings, the bulb can be quite difficult to extract, since you have to push against the fitting, then twist. Bulbs can sometimes shatter in the process.

[Dr_Garry]

Silliest thing this Aussie ever heard was while I was having my hair cut on campus at Notre Dame. Christmas was approaching. The hairdresser, God bless her soul, was having a hard time understanding how in the southern hemisphere Christmas fell during summer. After what I thought were a few lucid words explaining the nature of the seasons, she responded with “Gee, so you guys have Christmas in July!”.

[Savannah]

@Raguleader

You just don’t understand, because unlike teenagers, you are neither invincible nor do you know everything.

Ain’t that the truth. (Sigh.)

[Sierra_Indigo]

@Dr Garry

They’re called “bayonet caps”. Here in Aus, both BCs and American ESs (Edison screws) are used, making buying bulbs a minor annoyance. Why the BC was invented I’ll never know. Especially in old fittings, the bulb can be quite difficult to extract, since you have to push against the fitting, then twist. Bulbs can sometimes shatter in the process.

And hence my COMPLETELY JUSTIFIABLE THANK YOU HUBBY phobia.

This is not something I’ve heard, but something I read on another forum…

If America put Saddam back in Iraq, and left, then Iraq, a nation that has suffered unbelievable horror at the hands of America, would have a future, and would eventually recover. Over time, the brutal, illegal, and criminal actions of the US would be undone, and thus justice would eventually occur.

:smack:

[Scissorjack]

Hell, I posted that about Saddam in the “Controversial Beliefs” thread in the Pit, only quasi-jokingly: apologise for the mess, kick in a couple of bucks to cover the damages, and Iraq’d be a hell of a lot more peaceable and stable than it is now.

[Zabali_Clawbane]

@BGo79

<snip>While I was hooking up the cable from the first floor to all three rooms of their second floor apartment (the three grown men who live there do not have the faculties to do this, or programming universal remotes, or looking up things on the internet, or peeing IN the toilet…) the moron says “Be sure to ask me before changing the channel in your room, since it will change the channel on my TV, and I might not want to watch what you are watching!” I then explained that this will not happen, but he felt the need to warn us again for the next three nights in a row! :smack:

Maybe he was used to a multi-telivision household that only had one satellite receiver?

[Malacandra]

@Sierra Indigo

And hence my COMPLETELY JUSTIFIABLE THANK YOU HUBBY phobia.

In the UK we have both screw and bayonet fittings now, and I believe I’ve broken more screw bulbs than bayonet ones. You’ve still got a stress point where the glass bulb meets the metal cap. Use a teatowel to hold the bulb and you’ll be fine - or wear a gardening glove.

[Shirley_Ujest]

I was relaying an amusing newstory that I read on Fark to my evangelical BIL ( who is normal most of the time, but this was a doozy.)

The story was about how in Japan you can now buy soiled ladies panties from a vending machine.

My brother in law’s very serious response, " There is a clear cut case of needing Christianity if I ever heard it."

Ummmmm. Yeah.

[spazurek]

When I was in 3rd grade, my teacher was a complete psycho. I was living in Littleton, CO (yes, that Littleton), an area that, unbeknownst to me at the time, was rife with fundamentalist christianity (among other pathologies).

There were some fundie kids in the neighborhood, and at the bus stop we started to get into arguments because of my belief in evolution (I have no idea how this came up or how I managed to have such an apparently strong opinion about evolution by age 8…).

Anyway, the fundiekinder must have reported my heresy to the teacher. One day she approached me and angrily asked, ‘Are you jewish??’

I was of course baffled at the time, having no concept of what being jewish meant or implied. Now I’m just boggled – what the hell does being jewish have to do with a belief in evolution? I guess she somehow equated ‘jewish’ with ‘godless heretic’?? The layers of ignorance here still make my head spin.

[Slypork]

To the people going back and forth about the person I mentioned: There were no alternate explanations for her statements. She was dumb as a box of rocks and was offended if you tried to point out the stupidity of her statements. She thought Korea and Vietnam were the same because the US had fought “over there” and figured it was all basically one big country. On a similar vein, she thought Africa was a country. She was about as deep as a thimble.
And to all of the people talking about light bulbs: be glad they didn’t ask how to change a broken bulb !

[Slypork]

I take back everything I’ve ever said about stupid and/or ignorant people. I am not even capable of including the correct link to one of the greatest threads around.
I stand humbly before you all, admitting my shame and disgrace. I will now join the Witless Relocation Program where they find new lives for morons who insist on making asses of themselves in public. I’ll probably be sent to a trailer park in Bumfuck, Alabama and be given a job at the local Kwikee Mart.

[M.Meursault]

@erie774

On a similar vein, she thought Africa was a country.

Hey, to be fair, that’s a common mistake many idiots make.

[Nava]

@M. Meursault

Hey, to be fair, that’s a common mistake many idiots make.

Stupidity, like misery, loves company. Only because there’s many idiots out there doesn’t make 'em intelligent or bright or educated. Same as having lived lifes of privilege doesn’t mean that my hoity-toity classmates shouldn’t have known that toilet paper doesn’t just teleport itself into being.

[M.Meursault]

@Nava

Stupidity, like misery, loves company. Only because there’s many idiots out there doesn’t make 'em intelligent or bright or educated. Same as having lived lifes of privilege doesn’t mean that my hoity-toity classmates shouldn’t have known that toilet paper doesn’t just teleport itself into being.

Yeah, you’re right. Immediately after posting that, I realized it was a cheap, off-topic shot. I apologize.

[Lush_Puppy]

Me: Wow. A blue moon.

Friend: What’s a blue moon?

Me: When there are two full moons in one month, the second full moon is called a blue moon.

Friend: We have 2 moons??!!

[SomeoneElseHasMyName]

Upon meeting a young woman recently, I heard a great story. She was using her cell phone in the kitchen, when - oops! - she dropped the phone into the full sink. Quickly computing that Water + Electricity = BAD, she knew not to reach into the sink. So she leaned close to the water and shouted, “Hang up! Hang up before you get electrocuted!”