When my husband and I go out to eat, we pretty much always sit across the table from each other. I think it’s been that way since we started dating. In fact, with anyone, I prefer to be across the table - it’s much easier to converse.
But when we were at breakfast this morning, I noticed another couple in a nearby table seated side-by-side, and I knew I had to do a poll.
Side-by-side seems like something you’d only see on television. Of course it’s across from one another.
Usually across from each other. But there are a few places where the cushioned bench seating on one side of the table is so much nicer than the chairs on the other that the wife and I will do side by side then. But that doesn’t happen often.
I once saw this asked a long time ago as an etiquette question. The answer was that “across” makes it easier to converse and is more respectful of personal distance, whereas “side-by-side” is more intimate: Rubbing elbows and that sort of thing.
So friends and acquaintances should sit across, and lovers should sit side-by-side. Old married couples could fall in either category depending on whether they’re more interested in communicating or snuggling.
Again, that’s the “etiquette” version. But, really, I doubt there’s an etiquette book on this subject. Still, the advice stuck with me.
Once when I was a little kid (seven y.o. or so), I was dejected because I didn’t get to sit next to my Grandma at a family meal. She pointed out that with us sitting opposite one another we’d be able to see each other better.
Although the event was at a table with eight or more people, that was how I was introduced to the idea that “across” was the way to go.
The early results are interesting. I don’t see a whole lot of people who sit beside each other in restaurants, but it happens often enough that I’d have expected at least one or two of “those kinds” to weigh in.
I have to say that when we have supper at home, we’re side by side, but we sit on the couch and eat off the coffee table while watching the news. On the rare occasions that we use the dining room table, we’re at 90° from each other with me closest to the kitchen door.
Can’t answer, because it totally depends on the seating configuration of where we’re placed. We do it both ways, either way, depending.
Depends. Who is the other? What are the seats and table like? Are we sharing a giant meal or eating separate dishes? What is my mood (and that of other)?
My husband and I always sit side by side. It would feel odd for us to sit across from each other since that’s what we always do. Guess it just started because we lived far apart when we met and wanted to be as closes as we could during the times we were together.
[Emphasis added]
Well, of course you are. Do you expect him to get up and refill his plate? :eek:
Sorry! Sorry! Meant to post that in the Men Going Their Own Way thread.
I prefer to sit “Across from each other”. But a few years ago, I was dating a girl that only liked to sit side by side. It didn’t matter where we were or who we were with.
He can reach across the table to get the bowl or pot of whatever he wants to refill his plate. No need for me to run. The reason I sit nearest the door is based on the rare occasions when we have others over to dinner. It’s easier and faster for me to retrieve items from the kitchen since I’m the one who arranged the cabinets. Plus it’s tacky to send a guest to fetch his/her own hot sauce or mustard.
Anyway, it’s my spot. That’s why I sit there. It’s also where I sit when I set up my sewing machine or my stenciling supplies.
I always sit where I can see the door. I don’t want to be taken by surprise.
It doesn’t matter whether I’m with one person or multiple people–and especially when I’m alone.
When it’s just me, or just me and one other person, I usually try to sit at the bar, which puts us side by side. I would never do that a table, though.
A couple weeks ago I sat next to my friend when we went out to dinner. It was a 4-top table and the restaurant was super loud and I’ve got awful hearing so instead of trying to read her lips, I sat in the seat 90 degrees to her seat. She probably thought it was weird (we’re both hetero ladies) but whatever. It’s what worked best!
I always sit across, otherwise.
Booth, always across. However, at a 4-top table qirh only two people, I really prefer 90°. This is with my spouse, or really any close friend. Four-tops can be pretty wide, and if the music is loud I feel like the other person is way over there and I have to shout. But 90° doesn’t feel turtle dovey like side by side.
Also, 90° at a four-top if it keeps me out of traffic better.
I voted for across but really I always sit with my back to the wall whenever possible and the other person can do as they please.
I would say with a romantic interest or with a friend, I sit across the table from the person UNLESS the get-together involves looking at paperwork or photos or something like that. I don’t have any objection at all to sitting next to my companion; it just isn’t the default.
Right
Bingo
So, how should I vote? Footsie, I guess.