On the contrary, I just don’t give them an excuse to bounce me. When you are an 18 y/o budding rock star, hair down to your arse, having a laugh touring, as I was back in the day (way back) , you learn really quickly that it’s easier to play the game, try to appear like a sensible human being and remember that unless you are in Axl Rose’s league, the decision to let you into a country will be made by one bloke, not very well paid, and how much of an arse you are to him.
Once upon a time I had a nice management lady to worry about work permits and visas (after the first visit, when my Mum did it, ha ha), but I was acutely aware that rolling up half-pissed in ripped jeans and an obscene t-shirt made for a longer time in Customs than if I wore a shirt and trousers. Not very rock ‘n’ roll, but then nor is standing in line like a child while they try to work out if the debris in the bottom of your rucksack is drug detritus.(My vice is/was alcohol, so ha!)
Ironically, the only problems I have ever had have been coming home to the UK, they used to hover at the entrance to the Green Channel to accost this scruffy oik, laden with guitars. EVERY single time, I got pulled apart as they searched for any sign of drugs, or anomalies in my paperwork for the instruments.
I spend lots of my time these days filling out Carnet-de-Passage for trucks full of sound equipment, and my business depends on stuff NOT getting impounded whilst some leisurely C&E chap double checks the validity. Paperwork is a major ball-ache, and costly, but one which isn’t going away anytime soon. It’s some people’s one chance to throw their weight around and act important, and they like to savour it. Whether all of it is absolutely necessary for the good of the country involved, I don’t know, but I make sure all that I need has every i dotted and t crossed.
Like Dervorin says “Hand over documents, stand quietly and stare into the distance when they are being scrutinized. Answer any questions immediately, but don’t volunteer any information beyond what’s being asked for. Be polite; act normal.”
If you act like a stuck up arsehole, you can guarantee that the Customs man can be a far bigger one than you, and it might just brighten his otherwise boring day by really really screwing up yours.