I see it a lot. I love it and wish I could do the same.
I am talking about the kids running around empty tables, screaming and laughing in play. Not about tantrums, bumping into strangers and being obnoxious.
Wow. I go out to dinner about once a week, and I can’t remember ever sitting near a screaming child. A cute child, yes–some of the restaurants we go to are pretty family-oriented–but I honestly cannot recall ever having a screaming, temper-tantrum-throwing child. Or, for that matter, a child running around the restaurant like people are always talking about here.
Now, I live my life surrounded by small children, both mine and others’. And I’m somewhat used to kid noise. But I really hate screaming, and I really don’t run into it all that often in public.
Small girls do seem to come automatically equipped with a love of screaming for fun, and they have to be consistently taught not to do it.
It’s actually excellent parenting skills – if you give them what they want when they scream, they’ll scream again next time. If you make clear that this is definitely a way to never, ever get their way, they stop doing it.
Having said that, if they’re four and they pull this stunt, it means that Mom has given in before, and this is the price.
Also, my son was a huge screamer when he was 4-6 months old. He wasn’t upset, he just liked to scream. It’s not like you can reason with a kid less than a year old, they don’t speaka da english. So we ended up doing things like leaving restaurants right when the food comes (which really sucks), or one of us would be at a gathering, while the other would walk the baby around outside in the parking lot, and we’d take turns.
This past summer I went out to dinner with a friend – it was a better Mexican restaurant, definitely family-friendly but they also have a full bar and live music, so it’s not like we were at Chucky Cheese or something. And it was around 9pm. Anyhow, after the musicians left they played piped in music which was a little louder than I would have liked, but not loud enough to cover up the sound of the little girl who was running around our table and BLOWING A WHISTLE. There were at least three adults at her table, no one made an effort to play with her or give her another toy, they just kept talking and let her amuse herself.
WTF?
Get over yourself. The appearance, behavior, and attitude that both of these individuals was consistent with what appears to be common in some ghettos in the area. It was relevant, so I’d rather you try to not castigate me over an accurate descriptor.
In what way was it pertinent?
Friday, November 2, at Chuck E. Cheese. Need I say more?
Oh, I almost forgot!
Two weeks ago, I ducked into the Macaroni Grill for lunch, since it is next door to my work. It was after the lunch hour, so I hoped it would be quiet. I often go in there alone, with a book. Usually, the hostess remembers that I like to have a booth.
Instead, I’m seated at a table in what I think of as The Pit–booths surround an open floor area where there are about 8-10 tables. Before I could ask for a booth, the hostess left, so I sat down.
And immediately realized that the other 4 tables that were filled in The Pit each had at least one very small child with them.
It was the most hideous restaurant experience I think I’ve had, atmosphere-wise. The baby across from me was eating straight off the cloth tablecloth, staining everything, making an unappetizing mess, throwing food, and periodically shrieking at the top of its lungs. The little toddler to my right threw a huge crying fit over whatever her mother had ordered her; it lasted for much of the meal. Her big sister (maybe 5) had a tantrum too. The other babies and children I couldn’t see too well, but I could definitely hear them. They shrieked, squealed, and cried throughout the meal. One little boy kept running up and slapping the empty chair next to mine. His parents didn’t even tell him to stop.
It was awful. It was as if some intelligent hostess had tried to segregate all the families with children, and then some idiot came along and seated me right in their midst. What is odd is that I usually see very few children in that place, which is one of its attractions.
I have time off work today.
I dropped my kid off at school, where a bunch of five and six years olds were screaming and running to be the first on the climbing frame.
Got the shopping done where every infant was exercising it’s lung power to the nth degree and decided to stop at a cafe for a soothing cuppa. There was one child in there, she made the same noise as ten normal children.
My eardrums feel bruised.
My kid didn’t go through the screaming in public stage. I love her so much.
About a month ago, I was waiting for my husband in a subway station. I heard this echo-y screeching. After a minute or two (it was a very big space, with a lot of corridors off it), a harrassed-looking mother pushing a stroller comes into view. She had a little girl about five, who looked mortified, and a little boy around two, who was walking beside the stroller. Every few feet he’d stop, jump up and down a couple of times, and scream.
He’d obviously been denied something- he didn’t want to go where he was going, he wanted candy, he wanted to go home- and was in serious, but controlled, rage over it. He could walk, he wasn’t constantly sobbing, he was just being as unpleasant as he knew how to be. It was actually pretty funny, if you didn’t have to be right beside him. His Mom had the expression that said she was aware, they had to get wherever they were going, and she was embarrassed and apologetic.
I thought about (from Straight Dope advice, actually) going over, hopping up and down a couple of times, and bellowing back. Just to see what he’d do.
We will expect a complete public “boy was I wrong.”
Of course, you could be lucky. My son has had one tantrum ever. His “I don’t like it” behavior is to pout and be alone. He is good at being sullen, but since he disappears behind a chair or to his room, it doesn’t disturb anyone. And in public, the worst he’s every gotten is maybe a little whiny. He was a public wanderer though - one of those kids who needed to be walked in the restaurant waiting area while waiting for food. And he’s a toucher. Set off the museum alarm when he was three - and although he’s learned a little since then, he’ll touch if he isn’t told not to.
My daughter was born a screamer. She wears her emotions out in public, and every emotion - great joy or great disappointment - is shared with the world (it has gotten better). But she completely lacks perspective on great disappointment. She’s the one I’ve removed from restaurants leaving cold food (keep cash on hand and have some idea of the bill size, you may need to walk out without seeing the bill with one of these kids). Rational discussion, not giving it, punishment…its taken a LONG time to get her to control herself.
I’m laughing at the ad for the “Fart Machine II” that is coming up in my Google ads.
Anyway, last Friday night I got out of work and was having a beer and dinner at an outdoor bar/restaurant at a local hotel. All of a sudden about 6 boys, ages maybe 10-12 are running all over the pool area, yelling and carrying on, blah blah blah. After about 5 minutes, a guy came up next to me and was ordering a drink. I was giving the kids the look of death and he kind of chuckled and said “They’re playing Manhunt.” I just looked at him and said “Yes, I see. It’s very relaxing.” The game was over.
GET OFF MY DAMNED LAWN!!!
I hear my neighbor kid every morning at 7am.
He hates his dad taking him to the sitter’s.
He is definitely in a public place, as he screams all down the street, passing several stores and sidewalk coffee shops. to wherever poor Papa is parked today.
Khadaji, it may very well not be that it’s only happened twice in two years. But those are the only two instances that have registered with me. The Ruby Tuesday’s incident stayed in my memory because it was so ridiculous. I heard the noises, thought, “Well, the parents’ll put a stop to that,” then heard the dad say “No, you gotta do it like this!” :dubious: Just then, the waitron approached, and I said, “How far can we get from that group and still be in your section?” So we moved three booths away, and it was all good. Anyway, that’s the one I remember; there may have been others.
Heh…that reminds me of something that happened in a salon when I was seven or so. I was utterly silent, and someone still got offended. The stylist, who was a total Jersey ho – think Adriana from Sopranos – took me to the back to wash my hair. Now, it may have been different for an adult, but the way tiny little me was positioned, I was directly facing a set of eye-searing ceiling lights. Having my eyes open was painful in one way, and having them closed was painful in another way, so I alternated open for as long as I could bear it, and closed for as long as I could bear that, during the longest shampooing of my life. Then she brought me back to the floor and announced to my mom, “She was actin’ like she was doyin’ – flappin’ her oyes open an’ closed!”
Well, my mom said nothing, and I said nothing, just sat there silently wishing death on Ms. Short Hills while she cut my hair. See, I’d been indocrinated to believe that saying “The lights are right in my eyes and it hurts” was exactly the same as screeching “MOMMYYYYYYY! IT HURTS OWWWWEEEEE!” Might as well have done the second, since the stylist was apparently incapable of talking directly to me.
dwc1970, I don’t think Chuck E. Cheese counts, really. Ooh, I’ll tell you what used to aggravate the hell out of me, though! When I worked at the mall, the smoking area, better known as the parking garage, was generally overrun by the teens and twentysomethings who also worked there. Total drama queens. Always screeching “Omigodddddd, I got GUM on my SHOE! Omigoddddddd, I don’t know why he didn’t CALL me! Omigodddddd, omigodddddd!” Now that, I couldn’t tune out. Gah.
Either my neighbor’s kid is going through some rough toddler years or the mom just doesn’t like the idea of having to be a parent who doesn’t yell at her kid for anything and everything. ::shrugs:: I occasionally hear him screaming and crying, but only after I hear Mommy yelling.
I know there have been more recent incidents but this one stands out in my mind, despite the fact that it happened months ago.
Someone was in the store using the self-service photocopiers and she had a very young baby with her. The baby started to cry and was ignored… and it just went on and on and on. I don’t know how long they were there, but I’d estimate at least 45 minutes. I know I took one 15 minute break during the time and when I got back (surprised they were still there ignoring their screaming baby) the other staff told me it hadn’t let up while I was gone, and it continued for ages after that. By the time they left, the staff (primarily female with children of their own) were quite distressed. I can’t imagine what she was photocopying that was so important that she had to ignore that poor baby for so long, but I hope it was worth it :mad:
Despite the universal disapproval and anger at the mother, no one said anything to her. We have confrontation problems - highlighted by the time the store manager stood chatting to a father as his 2 or 3 year old son attacked and broke the Kodak self-service photo machine, and said nothing about it. He did smile at them and say goodbye as they left though :rolleyes:
I confess… I used to do this with my friends when I was around 7 or 8. We did it because it was cool to listen to. It made some weird sound when when you were one of the screamers. Hard to explain, but I remember us thinking it was the sound of our screams bouncing off each other.
:o
Off the top of my head:
This last weekend a kid almost ran right into me while running and screaming in the aisles at Trader Joe’s.
About a week before that, the kids they experiment on* in the Child Development department on my college campus disrupted a decent portion of the Music department with their screaming. They were in those gigantic stroller things the CD students roll them around in, which are their own disturbance anyway, since they move slowly and block walkways.
A couple of weeks before that, a screaming kid disrupted my friend’s wedding.
Those are the only ones I can place to a specific date and location, because if I devoted enough gray matter to remembering those instances, other parts of my brain may start leaking out of my ears.
In all seriousness, it’s not really as common as all that, but there’s three in the last month or so, and I have scarcely been to an intentionally kid-friendly place the entire time. One of them was in a college music department, fer Og’s sake. (I like to think that some enterprising music student recorded the screams and is now sampling them in an edgy electronic tune.)
When I dated a single mother who lived with her sister, sis’s husband, and their popular daughter (lots of little friends who were at the house a lot), the shrieking was pretty common. Happy shrieks, though, and who doesn’t love hearing those? To an extent.
The angry/attention screaming, though, that was a nightmare when I worked at the Halloween store last year. The kids who were profoundly happy about getting their costumes mostly (mostly) made up for it, though.
- OK, so it’s really a playground, not a lab, and probably what’s happening is the CD students are getting practical child care experience and get to watch children develop in real time. But it tickles me pink to imagine that area mothers and fathers are dropping off kids to participate in a battery of Rorschach tests all day.
That’s why the Saturn dealership in Bowie, MD (maybe it was Greenbelt?) installed a kids’ play area in the showroom sometime in the early 90s. I’m sure some small part of the reason my parents bought a Saturn was that it was the only dealership they could stay in long enough to finish the deal without me getting bored.