When you got a second cat, did your established first cat's personality change?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Man, I’m starting to be annoying with this cat thing! (My only hope is that Skald continues to write his book, otherwise I’d be the “Doper most easily identified with a single subject ever”, after lieu! Oh, or lissener. I think I’m still safe.)

So, we have cat 1, Dewey. (Let us ignore dog 1-and-only, Haplo, in this, because he may never progress beyond “kill the cat”, so one cat to him is pretty much the same as ten.) I’ve had Dewey for three weeks. I like Dewey. He’s very doggy, very people-centered. Drags his toys around with him in his mouth. Lurves on me. Not a lap cat - he’ll be petted in your lap if you insist, but he’d rather you came to him and operated on his terms. Loves to lay on the table by the window. Has been stopped from howling at 6 AM by putting the litterbox in the dining room and shutting the door, which is a poor choice from the litterbox perspective but a great one for my sleep. In other words, a cat I have adjusted to who has adjusted to me.

I’ve read all this stuff which suggests that Dewey would be happier if he had another cat to play with. He’s not bored, I don’t think, but maybe he could be more stimulated. He did come from a shelter with a billion other cats. (Keep in mind, though, that his personality was totally different in the shelter - not “my Dewey” at all.)

Thinking about it (and listening to my boyfriend) I’ve become a bit concerned that if I get Dewey a little friend, he’ll change and not be “my Dewey” anymore. The cats that I’ve met seem to have had pretty changeable personalities - very influenced by environment. I’m worried that if I got another cat, having the other cat around would change Dewey some. Maybe make him less people centered, less doggy, distract him from me. (I’m a narcissist, which is why I’m really a dog person. I like to be adored.)

What has your experience been with this? What happened when you added a new cat to an established cat’s household? A new kitten? A new older cat? (Aaron says you guys can’t be objective and every response is going to say “Get a new cat!” I said, yeah, duh, but maybe there will be cute pictures also.)

2

A lot of it depends on the personality of the cat to begin with. if a cat is people-centered, that’s not really going to change in most cases - you might just have two cats competing for your attention(one for each hand). Some cats, however, do prefer the company of other cats to the company of humans. I do not have that problem with mine. As I am typing this, there are four cats in the office - 2 on the desk, one on the back of the chair, and one on the floor giving me the “pet me now” paw-hook on the arm.

My advice about getting a second cat stems from two issues which are really one: a single cat can be lonely if left alone for long periods of time. A lonely cat is more likely to be destructive - i.e. knocking things off the mantel just to watch them fall, etc. Two cats can keep each other occupied and give each other someone to snuggle and play with.

Is it possible that two cats will play with each other and ignore you? Yes, it is possible. It just hasn’t happened with mine. I would wait until you had bonded with Dewey a bit more before introducing another cat, just to make sure.

And good luck - you know we’ll be expecting pictures. :slight_smile:

(Private message to Aaron: Ppppppfffffffffffffffffffffttttttttttttttttttt!)

3

How long would you suggest constitutes a bond in Dewey’s screwed-up little brain?

4

We got a 2nd cat. At first, the 1st cat was NOT PLEASED about the situation. After a couple of weeks, the hissing and fighting went away, and now the two cats are buddies. It hasn’t changed cat #1’s personality at all, as far as I can see, although now there are times when the two cats are playfully chasing each other around the house when otherwise she would likely just be sleeping on the bed. Cat #1 still wants as much human affection as she did before cat #2’s arrival.

5

Adding a second cat did change the behavior of my first cat. I’ve had cat 1 (Marion) for 10 years. She has never been a lap cat but liked sleeping with us (usually settled between my ankles) and being near by in the TV room downstairs when we were watching TV. Marion was also spoiled as an only (mammal) pet and has shown a past dislike for other dogs and cats.

Last January we got another cat. A friend with 5 cats died and we took in one of those (Carrie). After a fair bit of hissing and minor spats Marion established herself as the dominant one but has changed her behavior. She tolerates Carrie but dislikes her enough that she no longer sleeps in bed with us leaving the bedroom to Carrie. She no longer goes downstairs much leaving that area to Carrie as well. (Some of that may be due to age, arthritis and a bit more difficulty in navigating the stairs. Food and litter box for Marion are both upstairs now.)

So in our case adding a second cat did modify the first cat’s behavior. It will depend on the personality of the individual cats. I’m not surprised at Marion’s behavior knowing she wasn’t fond of other mammals (the menagerie of fish and birds are OK) but had hopes that she would be friends with Carrie. It can work. Years ago a girlfriend got a second cat to keep her first cat company and they quickly became friends. I think they were both younger than Marion so that may have some influence.

6

My (at the time - 13 year old cat, RIP) female wasn’t happy with the new kitten at ALL, and she hated Ziggy’s very existence.

He attacked her with gusto and claws every single time he could potentially surprise her.

I spanked him once, and he’s never ever loved me againl. :frowning:

7

So, is there sort of a consensus that if the cats get along, they remain your adored fluffballs, but if they don’t they can be different cats?

8

Not a “different cat” per se, just pissed off assholes.

9

Sometimes getting a second (or third) cat can make the prior cats more affectionate to their humans. The lady I catsit for had one of her two cats die. She adopted a former feral I had trapped (Felicia) to keep her remaining cat (Zac) company. After careful introductions and several months of miffff mifff and pifff pifff, they settled down into a comfortable relationship. Felicia was never affectionate to her human. She would allow herself to be brushed (which she loves) and would occasionally sleep on the bed, but was very standoffish. Two years pass, and a juvenile tom takes up in my friends yard. This lady will not let anything go hungry, so she started putting food out for it. The cat was very pretty, and very affectionate - allowing himself to be petted within about 2 weeks of showing up there. My friend borrows a trap and enlists my aid in trapping “Ben” to have him neutered and get his shots. He was a sweetie to the vet clinic staff as well, so my friend decides to make him an inside cat. Several weeks of under the door investigations go by, and he is allowed out with Zac and Felicia. Several more weeks of mifff mifff and pifff pifff. Things begin to settle down, and Ben is grudgingly being accepted by Zac and Felicia. The suprise? Felicia is now very affectionate toward my friend, even to the point of claiming her lap.

So I guess the upshot of it is - I have no idea what Dewey will do. He’s a cat. He most likely won’t love you any less for providing him with a playmate. As for bonding, I’d wait until you’ve had him at least four months or so.

Are your dog and your boyfriend going to have heart attacks over this?

Where would you like your official “Crazy Cat Lady” membership certificate sent?

10

Every time we gain or lose a cat, the other cats adjust, sometimes in unexpected ways.

For example, our cat Isaac is very people-oriented. When we got Isaac, she and Ugly got along fine. When we added more cats, Isaac started fighting with Ugly and stopped socializing with us much. When Ugly died, Isaac reverted to the previous very people-oriented behavior, though the “new cats” were still here.

11

I had Nekko for about 4 years before introducing Bastet. After about 3 weeks of hissing both of them get along well, grooming each other and play fighting. Nekko has not changed much – he is slightly more affectionate, but not a lot. When I got Bastet she was interested in other people who came in, Nekko hid. Now both of them hide when other people come in.

12

Four months? :frowning:

13

I can’t give a definite time frame because I don’t know Dewey. I just want to make sure he knows you’re his person, and he’s your overlord, before another cat is brought into the equation. I would hate to see you have two cats and be unhappy with the way the situation turned out.

14

Oh, I think it’s a good idea, I just wanted to go kitty shopping. :slight_smile:

15

I know the feeling! A friend of mine has a nasty habit of sending me pictures of adorable kittens, when she knows I already have 8 cats and really, really don’t need any more. I had, of course, said that when I had 6 cats, but when Cricket and Sugar Magnolia came my way there was no way I was letting them go.