After living in NYC 15 years, my wife and I have decided to seek out other pastures. Not really “settling down” per se, but certainly longing for a simpler life… one that doesn’t include being shoulder-to-shoulder with 10 million other people, having to move the car to the other side of the street every day, and paying outrageous amounts of money for an apartment that doesn’t even have a washer and dryer. But now the question is just: where?
We don’t have kids or debt, so the world is pretty much our oyster. We do, however, have a puppy (well, he’s 2) who is a huge part of our family, so it needs to be a place that’s dog-friendly. Work-wise, we’re both in a bit of a transition period, but suffice it to say we both freelance and have the ability to work pretty much anywhere. She has also just completed her yoga teacher training, so somewhere yoga is part of the culture would be ideal.
We’re basically looking for a small town with a big city feel, or even a suburb of a large city. We don’t want to move to another big city like Chicago or L.A., for example, but we also don’t want to end up bored milking cows on a farm (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Places we’ve been looking into, to give you an idea, are St. Petersburg FL, Virginia Beach VA, the Orlando area, Raleigh and Wilmington NC, and maaayybe Seattle, although I feel that might be comparable to NYC. You’ll notice what these cities all have in common: better weather and a close proximity to water, both very important!
Anyway, if you’ve read this far then kudos to you, because my eyes have glazed over from all the research I’ve been doing on various cities. On the other hand, I can now tell you the average cost of living in just about every city in the United States…
Well, I was going to suggest somewhere along the Front Range of Colorado, but then I got to the “water” bit.
You’ve listed tourist destinations and I’m pretty sure The Triangle in NC is not the place to go to get away from traffic and people, but I guess compared to NYC it might feel positively rural.
You make a good point; I want to make sure we’re not getting caught up in a false mindset, where tourist cities sound great because who wouldn’t want to visit them? But it’s different to live in one, so I’ll keep that in mind. Of course, New York gets its fair share of tourists, too.
I’m not against Colorado as a rule, and I should have mentioned that large lakes would suffice, as well. As long as there’s swimming, kayaking, water skiing, that sort of thing (small lakes or ponds wouldn’t cut it), it should be fine for us. But I think the cold might eliminate the state; four seasons are fine but we’re tired of harsh winters!
Burlington VT is a great place, accessible to NYC via plane, car, or bus, and there are a lot of people who end up around here as ex-NYC transplants.
The weather is not going to be much of an improvement, though it’s easier to appreciate the nice weather here than it is in the city.
Your wife could easily start a studio or find one to work at.
Professional-level theater gigs are kind of few and far between, but they exist (though having a car is a must). Zillions of community theater/school theater/educational kinds of projects if you want to get involved that way.
Consider the Northern Kentucky suburbs of Cincinnati. Very much a small town feel, within walking distance of downtown Ciincinnati, across a pedestrian bridge
If you’re going to consider Covington, Kentucky, then you might also look at some of the suburbs of Columbus, Ohio. The only drawback, in terms of your criteria, is that the Scioto River is a bit smaller than the Ohio River. However, the Columbus metro area is a bit smaller than the Cincinnati metro area, and rather more “liberal” socially and politically. (I lived in Columbus for about 12 years, and I did enjoy my life there.)
Winters on the Front Range of Colorado (Ft. Collins to Pueblo, including Loveland, Boulder, Denver, CO Springs and smaller places) are not harsh, despite the reputation. It can be in the 50’s and 60’s for weeks then we get a shit-ton of snow, but it warms right back up again. We had a foot of snow two weeks ago and today it was 95.
I’ve lived in several “tourist cities”. Aspen, Vail, OC Md., and live near a touristy town now.
Don’t let that label scare you away. All of the things that make them popular are available to you year round.
I find (IMHO) that Florida and much of the East Coast are very similar. While NYC, Boston, etc. are very much unique, once you get south of DC, I feel there is a certain sameness. You have to go as far west as Louisiana to have a huge culture shift.
You should seek out change. I have and have never regretted it. Hell, I didn’t even mind a year and a half in Texas.
OK, residents of a huge swath of America, that was a VERY broad generalization that you will correctly disagree with.
Have you considered someplace in New Jersey like Jersey City, Hoboken, Weehawken, Edgewater or Fort Lee? Although I suppose for all intents and purposes, New Jersey’s Hudson River “Gold Coast” is a de facto “Sixth Borough” of New York. But you can get a lot more apartment or even a pretty decent house.
What about some of the various “commuter cities” like White Plains, NY, Morristown, NJ or Stamford, CT? Although personally, I feel like after being in New York, the proximity of those cities makes me feel like I’m on some far flung moon orbiting the center of the universe, much more than moving to a completely different city would.
Seattle is more similar to Boston IMHO. You might like either. Possibly Cincinnati or Denver as well.
The Big Island is probably too expensive, and it would be a hassle (though certainly doable) to get your puppy in (if I am not mistaken, there is a “home quarantine” option now). On the plus side, we do have water and great weather. In the highly unlikely event you’d seriously consider it, feel free to ask questions; I’ll be happy to tell you what I know. As I type, I’m sitting here looking at endless greenery, and listening to the sounds of birds chirping and water rushing through our stream. Although I’m only here for the summer at the moment, I can’t wait to move here permanently.
We moved here a year ago! I should have said “NYC 14 years and Jersey 1”, :D. We do like it, and you certainly get more bang for your buck, but you’re right, being close to the city (and still having to travel to it sometimes) has the reverse effect and it becomes frustrating. Better to just move to a new city and have everything at your fingertips, even if it means a 15-20 minute drive.
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Seattle is nothing like NYC.
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Beautiful skyline, but I’m talking about feel. It’s not a big enough change for us to go from a city with 8 million people to a city with 4. I used to live in Austin in the '90s, and that’s essentially what we’re looking for now. It’s much too crowded these days, but back then it was a big city with small town feel, if you ask me.
I was planning hard for a small coffee plantation on the Kona side of the island.
Derailed by my wife when I started to get too serious. She (correctly) pointed out that she could not be fulfilled employment wise on the Big Island.
I love Seattle, and living in its greater metropolitan area is wonderful. But … I don’t know what the winters are like in NYC. I think they’re milder here, but pretty grey. You could probably do better with that criterion.
Also, Seattle and surroundings are very expensive compared to some of the other places on your list. If you’re in love with it, or work in tech, that can be worth it. Housing is expensive, and has been growing more so at a furious pace. You’d be paying a premium for a strong economy and job market that it doesn’t sound like you need. Seattle will likely feel like a large city compared to those other places, although probably not compared to NYC.
That said, since you’re not worried about commuting you could choose to live in one of the more far flung suburbs and have a decent compromise. I don’t mean to trash talk Seattle, because I really do love it, but it just isn’t the first place I think of when I read your post.
One place I’ve lived that seems a little closer to what you’re looking for is Sacramento, CA. We really enjoyed living there, although in the end moved to the Bay Area for work. Its a small city, but I found it had decent amenities and restaurants, and large parts of downtown and East Sacramento are friendly to walking. Its 2 hours from Lake Tahoe and San Francisco. The latter in particular is an easy day trip, and much of the absolutely gorgeous California coast and wine regions is within an easy drive. I found it had lots of great hiking too.
Looking back, it was a great way to enjoy the best of California without paying too much of the premium. At the time I worked from home and my wife’s job tends to have offices in many locations, so with little in the way of work location requirements it really worked well. I’m in software so the Bay Area and subsequently Seattle were a better fit career wise. But you won’t have that issue.
Charleston, SC (and its environs) is hugely dog-friendly and still quite affordable compared to many larger metropolitan areas. I loved living there and recommend it to anyone wanting to live near water. It is a city w/ a small town feel somehow. And it has a hockey team as well as soccer and baseball, plus they host the Volvo tennis tournament.
Ha, I’m with you, I agree! That what I meant by “it might be comparable to NYC”, and I clarified further in Post 16. I do like the idea of the city, and it really is beautiful, but yeah, it probably feels too much like where we’ve been for so long to feel like a real change. And God yes, part of the reason for the change is to save money!
My in-laws live in Sacramento and we enjoy visiting; I’ll look closer at that possibility, thanks!
