It’s time for me to replace my SUV… Wife wants a new one, so we have been looking and I have been researching but online it is hard to separate chaff from gold. So - for car buffs here, help me out? Choices:
Any serious cons for any of these? And pros of course, but pros are easier to see 
You don’t provide any criteria for your purchase decision at all. How important is price to you? Size? Performance? You have kids? Haul shit regularly? Do you regularly go offroad, or would a large sedan or minivan better suit your needs?
I really, really liked my Highlander and the service department at Toyota was fantastic. I seriously had no complaints about that Highlander at all.
That said, I’ve got an Audi Q5 now and it’s like the Highlander but more magical.
The Pathfinder is a non-starter. The 2013 models are more mini-van than SUV. They totally trashed the frame and styling, going for soccer-mom rather than off-roading. We decided on the Xterra instead.
Well let’s see. Price - medium importance. Size - they’re all about the same aren’t they? Performance I can figure out from test driving them, kinda, but yes, handling is important. 2 kids - that’s why the 7-seater, for the trips and when grandparents come etc. No offroading, or hauling huge stuff (except maybe some IKEA style furniture very occasionally) but I just can’t make myself buy a sedan or minivan, that’s just giving up.
What I am looking that would distinguish it is basically reliability. I hate dealing with the car. The less intrusive it is in my life in terms of taking care of it the better.
We test drove the 2013 Pathfinder and the ride was bumpy/hard and fairly loud. It is almost out of consideration on that alone right now.
There were no issues with the Highlander for the 3.5 years I had it, except for a few (completely covered) factory recalls— and each of those pertained to the hybrid batteries. Just my experience, of course, but there it is.
I test-drove a Highlander yesterday, nice and smooth ride, fairly roomy although that huge console in the middle between driver and passenger seats is too bulky. We’re leaning towards that right now.
You might want to also consider the Acura MDX. It has 3rd row seating and is a well equiped SUV. It may be considered a premium brand by some but I think you’ll find that real pricing is in line with the Highlander when you sit down with the dealer to haggle over the price. Because it’s a Honda, it should be fairly bullet-proof as far as build quality. I find Toyota not quite up to par but that’s mostly a subjective, seat of the pants, impression.
Also check out the Volvo XC90 with third row seating available. I think it’s perhaps the best looking SUV of the lot you picked but that’s an entirely eye of the beholder kind of opinion. I do think the interior design is the best engineered of all of them. The engine is a bit long in the tooth though - reliable and time tested but not exactly a class leader.
We just went through this with the smaller SUVs, more of the crossover-types. Nissan Rogue, Ford Escape, Honda CR-V, Mazda CX-5, etc. We ended up with the Hyundai Santa Fe (5-seater) and we are very happy with it. For whatever that’s worth.
Thanks for the info. I am still waiting for the dealership to call me when the first 7-seater Santa Fe comes in.
Yeah. I really like my 2006 Pathfinder, but they have ruined it for 2013. I’m not due for a couple more years, but I really don’t know what I’m going to get.
That really surprises me, as it is much more car like than the earlier ones and I think the ride in my 2006 is just fine. Might just be different expectations I suppose.
I am just comparing it to the ride in Mazda CX-9 and Toyota Highlander. Those two are pretty smooth.
Yes obviously the guy who doesn’t do any towing or off-roading needs a fucking body on frame truck.
If you don’t do any towing or off-roading, don’t buy a fucking body on frame truck. BoF vehicles are heavy, don’t ride as well, have reduced interior space especially for 3 row stuff because the third row seats end up on top of the frame rails, are heavier(not that much but they are) and are unsafe in many kinds of crashes especially a rollover (very common) because the heavy frame at the bottom easily crushes the relatively weak non-load bearing passenger compartment.
Bying a 7 seat SUV to me is the ultimate expression of “giving up”. It is much more uncool than a minivan or sedan/wagon.
Do you like your children? Why not buy something that gets good crash safety ratings? The first thing you should be checking out is the IHS and NHTSA ratings for each vehicle. I’ll tell you right away that the Highlander and the CX-9 should not be considered at all. They are old cars and are less safe than newer competitors. GM’s Lambda triplets (Buick Enclave, GMC Acadia, Chevy Traverse) are great choices and very safe, and you can choose which trim suits you best, although the interior of the Traverse is a bit dated (the Acadia and Enclave are both recently updated).The new Ford Explorer is also pretty decent and can be had with a 4 cylinder tubo engine that delivers marginally better fuel economy, I think it also gets full marks for safety but can’t check right now so check it yourself. The Dodge Durango is the best driving of the bunch, being based on the RWD Mercedes GL platform, and can be had with ye good old V8 engine, but I believe it’s safety scores are not perfect (albeit still better than a Highlander) and the fuel economy is marginally worse.
Here’s a comparison from 2011, most of the info should still be current other than the Veracruz no longer being sold.
Here’s one from motortrend.
http://www.motortrend.com/roadtests/suvs/1105_three_row_crossover_suv_comparison/viewall.html
Their criteria and rankings are kind of debatable but at least it lays out the info for you. There now exists a Ford Explorer Sport, which is a version of the explorer with the twin turbo engine and uprated brakes and suspension that should address the performance aspect of it but that doesn’t really sound like your thing anyway. I would also add the Ford Flex and the various Lincoln iterations of both the Flex and Explorer, as well as the Dodge Journey, which is a bit smaller than the others but does offer 7 seater functionality for a very low price.
I have to second the Ford Flex option. Looks like a modern washing machine but otherwise an excellent, excellent family hauler. Greatly under-appreciated. I’d get the one with the fuck-off 365hp engine and sport suspension. 
We definitely wanted 2 captains chairs in the second row of our SUV, which the highlander has. We loved that car for my wife, but it is too small for me to drive comfortably. (I’m 6’5") We ended up with a Buick Enclave, which we’ve been very happy with, thus far.
In other words, I like that feature in the Highlander and would go that route.
All of the domestics (Durango, Flex, Lambdas, Explorer, Flex) have this as an option? I’m sure some of the others do too, it’s not a particularly rare feature.
You’re ragging on CX-9/Highlander, but your link ranks CX-9 1st and Highlander 3rd…
It’s not “my list”, it’s Motortrend’s, and that’s why I said the criteria and rankings for both lists are rather debatable. They like the CX-9 because it apparently handles the best. Is handling on a race track a big deal for your 7 passenger van? Or is crash safety a more pressing concern?
Also, the first vehicle I bought for myself at age 20 with my big ol army paycheck was a Ford van with sliding doors. I loved it. So much room for activities! Carry stuff you need for any coneivable job, and low insurance costs too. I’d buy another one (well a Ford Flex or a Dodge Caravan) in a heartbeat. Minivans are awesome.
To me, nothing screams “I am desperate to look like it’s still 1985 buy seriously someone put a bullet through my head please” like a 7 passenger “Crossover”.