Battle Pope could kick his ass while chatting up a cute barmaid.
In recent memory:
Bane
Lady Shiva
Rick Flagg
Bronze Tiger
Wilfred Brimley could beat Batman.
Skipping the super-powers joke…
Pre-crisis Karate Kid. In a walk, whether Batman’s prepared or not, unless “prepared” means “has just be made herald of galactus and thus has the power cosmic.”
Spider-Man, Captain America, and Wolverine.
Any of the X-Men, in fact, with the possible exception of Kitty Pryde. Of course, Batman could also beat most of them, in the sense that on any given sunday any team can beat any other…it just depends on which way’s the wind is blowing.
Xena. Jack Bauer.
But NOT MacGyver. Old Angus is the universe’s best fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants engineer, true, but he sucks in actual hand-to-hand combat.
“Powered” Woozy Winks was pretty unbeatable.
Batman would not be able to face Plastic Man. His pantsless power is too great.
Duran Duran.
I’m sure all his writers facing the monthly need to devise ever more ludicrous ways to have him survive the attacks of ever more powerful supervillains would gladly bash his head in with their keyboards.
Or The Inferior Five, they could do it.
Urkel.
Dracula.
The Bride, from Kill Bill.
A 1920’s style death ray.
The Spanish Inquisition.
God dammit.
/me leaves thread, head hung in shame.
Who of course should be able to defeat Batman on their own terms any time they liked.
Super Demolition Christ!
After the reminders in this thread, I think Batman would be ready for anything!
Would he be ready for… another Batman? I’d love to see the Dark Knight Batman take on the Neal Adams one, or the “definitive” Englehart/Rogers Batman square off against Adam West Batman!
Well, duh!
Justice LeAgue!
Wolverine. Spiderman. My sister. Anyone. Let’s face it, Batman is cool but other than having some neat gadgets and good training, he has no super powers.
Ahem. Good train and gadgets > your sister, and quite a few other people. She doesn’t have super powers, either, being handicapped by being real.
I wasn’t expecting that.
If you review the 1960s Batman TV series, you’ll note that each and every week, Batman and Robin are trapped in a death scenario. The only reason they are able to escape is because Batman just happens to have the exact gadget he needs in his utility belt.
In other words, he survives only because he is prepared.
Take away that essential element of preparation, and Batman would have died each week.
Ergo, an unprepared Batman could be defeated by:
Joker
Riddler
Penguin
Catwoman
Mr. Freeze
Archer
Clock King
King Tut
Egghead
Siren
Chantelle
Bookworm
Lord Ffogg
Louie the Lilac
and a bunch of others.
An unprepared Batman makes for a lousy crime fighter.