Assuming John’s a no-show in Oxford, who’s available to replace him at short notice?
Bueller? Anyone?
Lieberman. Eliminate the middleman.
Considering his speech giving record so far, I think this is a good tactical move. Make up reasons for being as unavailable as possible (hurricanes during hurricane season, “sudden” wall street crash we all knew was coming for years now, etc.), avoid speeches and debates like the plague, and hope that it holds the campaign together better than your own foot-in-mouth record has to date. Even McCain folks tend to feel Obama would do better during a debate, although neither candidate has been flawless, both need to spend some time buried in a stack of encyclopedias before they take office.
Conversely, Obama’s campaign should probably do the same with Biden, he’s probably going to get killed up against the MILF…er, I mean Palin. (Unless the topic’s honesty, Biden seems to be a little too honest, Palin seems to be willing to take any position that helps her win. I can see a Billy Madison scenario developing in that situation, gun and all. 
)
Frankly, while I’m looking forward to the upcoming car wreck debates, it would probably be better for everyone, especially the folks that still believe voting makes a difference, if they just skipped that part of the campaign. Better for the voters, because there’s no sense ruining fantasies that either camp is ready to take over. Leave it to the pros, the spokesdroids and advertising folks, to craft an appropriate fantasy about each candidate, and let that be your platform.
Don’t ruin it, if there’s no go reason to avoid the debates, they should create an artificial disaster of some sort to divert attention.
Oh, wait, it seems they’re already ahead of me on that… :dubious:
George Will, Chuck Norris to mop up.
How about Dave Letterman?
Keith Olbermann. Hey, he filled in for McCain on Letterman.
Why not have Letterman be the moderator while we’re at it?
If th President is incapacitated or unavailable in real life it’s the VEEP. this presents an unparallel opportunity for Palin to show she’s ‘ready to lead.’
I am suddenly left with a vision of a puppy playing with a taser…
It might also make sense for Biden & Palin to go on tonight, and Obama and McCain go on next week. Unless, of course, there’s a Daylight Savings Time crisis which requires McCain to put his entire life on hold again.
I know people have been saying this all along (ie, Biden’s gonna come off as a meanie), but have you seen her interviews lately? Her talk with Katie Couric yesterday was embarrassing, it was so bad. She’s lost her confidence. I think Biden will do just fine up against her.
This drives me crazy. The Bush people were amazingly good at this- setting up lowered expectations for their candidate by playing up the fact that the other side is a better speaker- and will “obviously” look much more polished than my candidate- but hopefully you’ll look past the polish, blah blah blah…
The better speaker then will come off as slick vs. their own candidate who must have truth on their side- or else why would they be going through this? In the meantime- when the candidate comes off as an intelligent human being and doesn’t get absolutely creamed by the opposition- then even though their candidate lost the debate- people come off thinking positively about the loser and negatively about the winner.
Although- I admit- I’m a little jaded about the debates anyway. They don’t really do any ACTUAL debating anymore. They answer in campaign speech rhetoric and rarely challenge each other.
Dude, even debaters don’t debate each other any more. It’s all game-playing, not discussion of issues.
Personally, I’d like to see Big Bird take McCain’s place. Everywhere.
Arizona doesn’t have Daylight Savings Time. 
Anyone remember Chicken George? The guy who dressed up in a chicken suit and followed George H. W. Bush around in 1992 when the first Bush wouldn’t agree on the terms of debating Clinton and Perot. Perhaps a 2008 version is in order. “For 5 1/2 years, I didn’t have a coop…”
George Thorogood and the Destroyers.
Can we put one of the talking heads in there to fill in for McCain? Perhaps Limbaugh, Hannitty or Beck? It could be a shit eating contest with the talking heads having to eat the shit they’ve been feeding us for years.
in order of aptitude:
[ol]
[li]An inert carbon bar[/li][li]A water cooler[/li][li]A think tank formed by my 3 guinea pigs[/li][li]Sarah Palin[/li][/ol]
Bob Scheiffer, the moderator of the third debate, was the guest on The Daily Show last night. He said that the format this cycle was a bit different, that the intent was to allot 10-15 minute blocks in which the candidates would discuss the topic in a back-and-forth manner, asking each other questions.
Whether (or how) it’ll work out is another thing entirely, but there’s always hope.
If McCain sends a surrogate, Obama needs to just walk away. His quarrel is with the candidate, not some flack.
Was that ascending or descending order of aptitude? Could go either way (though I kind of lean toward descending).
I think Obama’s handler had the right idea… Obama will be there, and there’ll probably be a moderator, and some microphones, and cameras, and a bunch of people with questions. If McCain wants to show up and answer some questions, that’d be neat, but otherwise, Obama’s okay with the idea of talking the whole time.