And why do they insist on wasting other people’s time on the general questions board?
I’ve noticed 2 new names (“Brittany” and “Sublime1300”) in the last few days and they appear to be pretty young and apparently clueless.
They’re newbies - “not that there’s anything wrong with that”, but they’ve been consistently asking the dumbest questions I’ve ever heard. They’re killing my valuable SD time 
GODDAMMIT you beat me to it…i was just about ready to make the same post…brittany isn’t too bad…the one thread i read she wonderend how a tape recorder worked, which actually took some intelligence to think (granted, it could have easily been answered with a trip to ask.com). however, sublime1300 asks the most inane and thoughtless questions. soon i expect to see, “where can i find my way out of a closet” or “what isthis my ass or a whole in the ground” (all errors intentional).
i think the standard answer should be “did you check a search engine?”
or maybe we should be flattered that someone comes to the board for every little bit of knowledge…
and i’ve noticed more than a few new posters recently…did cecil’s column get picked up in another newspaper or something?
Well, someone should set them straight.
(pun intended.)
“Winners never quit and quitters never win, but those who never win and never quit are idiots.”
And
“This site is more addictive than caramel-covered crack!”
Someone on the General board seems to be sick of it too - Homer:
"LOOK people. We keep bitching about him using us and not search engines, yet we keep answering his damn questions! Talk about negative reinforcement!!!
This guy bugs the hell out of me! We’re not search engines, dammit, we’re people, with lives, and families, and shit.
DO NOT HELP HIM! HE WILL LEARN HOW TO DO IT ON HIS OWN! TELLING HIM TO GO TO A SEARCH ENGINE, YET ANSWERING HIS QUESTION ANYWAY, IS NOT THE WAY TO GO!"
Don’t think I could have said it better myself.
-m
Yes, thank you. I must admit (as you probably noticed) that I crossposted it to every single active thread he has. JUST to make sure the point was well taken.
–Tim
You can’t accidently create a handicapped baby whilst smoking pot.
Homer- I don’t think I’ve ever seen a signature that’s made me belly laugh before. Ahhhhhh, if only crack came in aromatherapy varieties 
I swore in another thread I’d never jump into the pit again, but here goes: Yeah, I did a search, and yeah he’s asked some pretty simple stuff he coulda found out easily on his own, and maybe he’s putting us on (troll?), or maybe he’s just not too bright. So what. If you all think Sublime’s, et al topics are stupid, lame, and/or easily found on the web, etc. etc., then DON’T REPLY!!! He’s killing your valuable SD time? Oh please. So much “valuable” time is spent on this board with the most inane, stupefying shit I can’t believe it. Here’s a clue: When you see their names, don’t click on, just keep moving on down the list.
I don’t visit most topics in any forum because (a) I don’t have the time, (b) the subject line is not interesting, and © I’ve opened one too many of that particular poster’s threads already.
You guys aren’t being tricked into opening these posters’ topics, you opened them because you either (a) thought the subject line was deeply fascinating, or (b) knew the author and have a healthy respect for his/her previous threads.
People could earn a little bit more respect and increase visitorship to their topics by forming better subject lines. I have no intention of opening the following threads currently running on the 1st page of GQ:
DBZ (I refuse to open a thread just to find out what these initials stand for. Chances are, if I don’t know then I won’t be interested in knowing. Not to say that there isn’t a perfectly valid GQ hiding inside that thread, but in the interests of time management, I think I’ll pass).
How do I unclog a sink? (Ah, the deepest of mysteries. If Dran-o won’t do it, then you need a plumber… possibly a liquid one).
Evil Caneval (sic) (Now we know why a web search comes up empty for these guys- you have to spell at least one of the search terms correctly).
KILL my BonzaiBudthing (um… what??)
PGA Tour trading cards (And you thought stamp collecting was fun…)
Dissolving Bubble Gum (Because I’ve read TSD books).
Evolution (Because I really don’t need a headache right now).
Has anyone here been in a car accident (I was tricked into opening this one, only to find out that the subject line is only distantly related to the question being asked in the OP. This thread would get much better readership if it had been correctly titled).
Is “jumbo shrimp” an oxymoron ? (Sigh).
Offspring (What about it?? :mad: )
The Letters R and L on the keyboard (looking down at my keyboard, they look OK to me… next question?).
And so on.
The examples here aren’t meant to demean anybody, I’m sure I’ve started my share of lame (in the eyes of others) topics. My point is, it’s fairly easy to be selective about the threads you open. You shouldn’t find yourself wasting your time on anything here. Once you’ve seen two or three worthless topics by [whoever], you should know better.
The guy is obviously having a rather sophisticated laugh on us.
sublime1300? i doubt it. have you checked out his webpage?
i think 10 monkeys in a room, given 2 weeks could type a better page than that. course, i don’t have one myself…if i don’t have anything too important to say, why take up space?
hey…wait a minute…
As someone new to these boards I even noticed these silly posts . Because of some of the srong replies they have recieved I think the posters will either wise up or keep it up( which would kinda indicate the troll thing) . The mundane nature of thier questions aren’t hidden however , as already has been pointed out thier actual subject field is a good indicator to what lies within.
Hey–I’d just like to say that my “Has anyone ever been in a car accident” thread (yes, I know I left the question mark out; I noticed after I hit submit, and was going to fix it, but I realized I’d post it twice) was a specific question about how an airbag works.
“I need the biggest seed bell you have. . . no, that’s too big.”–Hans Moleman
Oops, sorry. I misread the post.
“I need the biggest seed bell you have. . . no, that’s too big.”–Hans Moleman
This is interesting:
Over in GQ we were discussing whether females are less likely to get flamed. Here’s the thread, http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/007030.html
Now, stop and think for a minute–would you have been less gracious towards the question,“How do tape recorders work?” if you thought it had been posted by a guy? Be honest, now… 
Conversely, would you have been more tolerant of the question, “When did the Beastie Boys form?” if it had come from a poster named Britainy?
Just curious. 
Oh, and Homer? Your apology is over in MPSIMS, you can pick it up anytime. 
I saw that, Mama, thanks.
Oh, hey, Mellonhead, I need to give props to Coldfire for my sig. I’ll do that now.
–Tim
You can’t accidently create a handicapped baby whilst smoking pot.
naw, i don’t think so…there’s a difference. it’s one thing to wonder how something works, and another to wonder about something that is probably being discussed in some chat room or newsgroup right now (like when the new star wars movie is coming out, new offspring album is coming out, etc). tape recorders are somewhat complex…we spend a good day or two in my 300 level radio production class on it.
but, have we conclusive proof that sublime1300 is male??? (i’m assuming that everyone is assuming that they are).
hmm…how do tape recorders work…a day or two later…topic: blank tapes…
i wonder…nah
For that matter, how do we know brittainy is female?
Heck is where you go when you don’t believe in Gosh.