You both won.
Sounds like the cat won.
Sounds like somebody needs a squirt bottle.
That’s silly. How would a cat work a squirt bottle?
The cat won by forcing you to modify your behavior to achieve happiness.
This is why I don’t have a cat.
My response to Part One would have been to first say “WTF is this cat doing on my chair?”, pick up said moggy and deposit it in the front garden, closing front door behind me.
I prefer an air-duster can. Safer around electronics. 