I am very sad today after lying awake this morning for the last twenty-seven minutes before the alarm, listening to my cat Bruno claw the glass of the sliding door to be let in. I am finally realizing I am naught but his slave, and I sleep only at his discretion.
He has me trained to feed him (and his brother) four times a day. He likes to greet the morning out on the screened porch at about five o’clock every day. Some time after that, determined by him, but approximately five thirty, he will come indoors and be served his breakfast. He will want to go out again afterward. Then in again for a nice leisurely shit. Then out. Then in, etc. It gets really ridiculous on the weekends, when I could theoretically sleep late, but actually must get up and obey this animal at least four or five times before my husband gets up around seven.
I have glued SoftPaws on the kitty claws. I have put double-sided tape on walls to keep them from being used as scratching posts. I have chased swift and jubilant creatures in the darkness of a living room after midnight armed only with a squirt bottle. I have yelled. I have thrown coasters. I have bought toys.
Hear me, Dopers, I am tired; my heart is sick and sad. From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever.
To top it off, the picture on my cat-a-day calendar for February 21 looks just like Bruno, so I have to look at his smug little mug all day!
This is why dogs are better than cats. And PCs are better than Macs. And the Who better than Zeppelin. And TOS better than TNG. And vanilla better than chocolate. And butter-side-up better than butter-side-down.
So for a factual question - is there no dominance thing going on in the cat world?
They say dogs are pack animals and if you establish yourself as the pack leader your dog will obey you. I find this to be true - although I also find it hard to not be submissive to such a cutie wootie baby pie.
What’s the deal with the nature of cats? Do they not follow any sort of leader in the wild? Why is it so much easier to get a dog to submit to you than it is to get a cat to do it?
Back when I lived with a pussy and a missy, we had one window AC unit. We had to keep the door to that room closed, because the apartment was too volumous for the AC to handle. The cat was constantly thinking that the best place to be at any given time was on the other side of that door. All night long, in and out, every two minutes.
Both the porch doors are the sliding glass type. I know they make those inserts that can be wedged in a door or window, but my husband thinks someone could break in that way. Also, he points out, those are much more expensive than killing the cat. Can’t argue with that. :dubious:
lieu, these are indoor cats who like to go out on the screened porch. And back in the house. And out. And back in.
Yes there is -if you have a multiple cat household, one of the males will almost always be noticeably in charge. If there is a strong female, she can manage to not be bothered by other males, but that Alpha male is easy to spot.
People, on the other hand? We are service providers and laps.
The “pecking order” at my house seems to be determined by who’s in the pissiest mood at the moment. I have two males and a female, all neutered young. Biggest cat is most laid back, smallest cat is grumpiest, youngest cat, who’s middle-sized, is the bratty little brother, most of the time.
Your cat, a predator with a tiny brain, hasn’t trained you. You’ve trained yourself, by repeatedly choosing relief from an irritating factor (like your stupid cat clawing at the glass door) over something else (like spending more time in bed). You’ve also trained your cat to just be annoying every time he feels like going in or out.
Decide what you want, and stick to it. Either get rid of your cats, or take control. Try earplugs when you go to bed. Decide on what the schedule will be for your cats’ entrances and exits and stick to it, no matter how much they yowl. They aren’t your masters; they aren’t your children; they’re nearly mindless, furry objects that you own. Treat them like the household possessions they are.
My youngest cat figured out very quickly that she could train me to wake up at will by pouncing on my chest, swishing her tail on my face, and then trying to dig a hole through the covers and into my legs if all else fails.
She does this whenever she decides she wants her breakfast, which is usually at some point in the wee hours of the morning - anytime from 2:30am to 6am, depending on mood. Sometimes she’ll decide that she feels like two shifts, which we shall call breakfast A (in the earlier time slot) and breakfast B (in the later time slot). There’s really no rhyme or reason to this… we’ve tried feeding her a snack before bedtime to tide her over, but it had absolutely no positive effect. Closing the bedroom door doesn’t work either - we end up with a screaming feline banshee for the duration of the night instead of a wee mischievous sprite for the ten minutes needed to wake us up.
Of course, no matter what time breakfast occurs at, she’ll immediately follow up with a demand that we entertain her whilst she quickly depletes all the food energy she just consumed, which usually involves hunting feet under the covers, attacking random bits of hair, or occasionally just using our semi-conscious bodies as an obstacle course for a frenzied spazz-out.
Actually, Bruno was no trouble at all until a couple of years ago, when he became an indoor cat. I also got married to a guy who doesn’t wish to share his bed with cats or let them eat off his plate, like a sensible person. I’ve been appeasing the two of them ever since!
