I used to think that abortion on demand right up until birth was a neat and easy answer until I was pregnant. I hate to admit that it can even happen, but I went off my rocker when I was pregnant. From a physical standpoint, I had a normal and uneventful pregnancy, but I also went crazy. If I had been very young, instead of 38 and pregnant for the first time, there was a good chance I might have been diagnosed as bipolar. As it was, I had enough stability behind me to make it pretty clear that my craziness was pregnancy related.
Now, I didn’t walk into the doctor’s and demand an abortion, but I did think about it a couple of times, and this was a planned and wanted pregnancy-- and I cooled off after I calmed down. These incidents happened late in pregnancy, and I didn’t really want an abortion, I just wanted the psychic trauma to be over-- which it would have, I suppose, but having toughed it out for say, eight months and a week, my doctor would have been better off talking me into a psych consult than prepping me for an abortion. Or even agreeing to an induction and delivering the baby (who when he was born at 41 weeks weighed well over 8 lbs, and probably would have been perfectly healthy three weeks early), on the basis that it was appropriate for my health.
Now, I was an unusual case. I do not represent women who have been seeking abortions for months, and frustrated at all turns, who would not be candidates for late-term abortions, if early term ones had been easy to get, or women who just found out their fetuses do not have brains, or who just got a cancer diagnosis, and want to start chemo immediately in order to try to live for the two children they already have.
It did make me think that a woman who has waited six months can probably wait another day (unless she’s having a heart attack, or kidney failure, or something, and then, get the damn fetus out). Of course, any woman can wait a day unless the law says she can’t or the abortion clinic is 50 miles away.
I wish any woman could make a measured decision about what to do, but a lot of times she can’t because of restrictive laws. If she has days before she goes from 14 to 15 weeks, and abortion is suddenly illegal, then she makes a quick decision, which she is more likely to regret, no matter which one it is. Same for if she makes a quick one because of the distance of the clinic.
So this brings me back to me, my craziness, and the confidentiality of doctor and patient. If my doctor could talk to me about my personal situation, knowing me like she did, a woman who had made a decision to become pregnant, and carefully carried a pregnancy for many months, telling me to wait, to think some more, that’s great. Being able to have a completely different conversation with a 14-year-old who was accidentally pregnant, and has concealed her condition for five months, because she was afraid of her parents’ reaction is just as good. Being able to have yet another conversation with someone whose planned pregnancy has gone terribly wrong is sad, but also good.
Restrictions and rules about what doctors can (or cannot, or even must) say are bad. Rules that make decisions rash are bad.
TL;DR: Rules that restrict abortions are bad and hurt women, and may in fact lead to decisions women regret, both to have abortions, and not to have them.
More to the point of the OP: every fetus is different. Not all of them develop exactly the same, and so even if we invested a lot of money trying to determine a point in time for “personhood,” at best we’d come up with an average, or maybe a mode.