Woah, woah, woah! We don’t need your whole life story here.
I had briefly worked for a woman who had the habit of putting “obviously” into her sentences . . . when no such thing was obvious.
“Obviously the client wants this part bigger, and obviously this other part is the wrong color.”
Some employees were intimidated by her, thinking that they shouldn’t have to be told things that were obvious.
I remember a customer that called who used “Basically” as a capital letter to start a sentence. Basically, every time he started talking, he’d add that word to the front. Basically, he talked really fast too, so he did it a lot. Basically it was all I could hear him say and I ended up just letting him drone on and on until I pretended the line went dead.
It seems worth pointing out that what will, for one person, be over-explanation, may, for another be insufficient explanation. A lot of the skill in being a good explainer lies in being able to assess what the explainee needs. And of course, if you are explaining something to a lot of people together, you are almost bound to pitch things at the wrong level for some of them.
Well, that’s how they rolled.
In one case, actually rolling across the lawn of the Conservative chairman straight into a tree. (“The accelerator stuck on” - funny how that only happens to the elderly…) Which should bring you some pleasure.
I had to reread that twice before my brain noticed the words ‘lawn of the.’ 
Some explainers just don’t *care *that you don’t get it.
Some explainers just don’t *get *that you don’t get it.
*Most *annoying is the explainer who knows you don’t get it but just keeps repeating the same stuff.
_Put the blanjet through the bezinger and then wongle the roudet.
_ wait! what’s a blanjet?
_Right in front of the bezinger! You need it so you can wongle the roudet.
_ No, I don’t understand.
_ It’s there. The blanjet – put it through the bezinger! Then after you wongle the roudet, you turn the poggler 3 times to the left.
_ Back up, dude. I’m not getting it.
_Simple. Put the blanjet through the bezinger, then wongle the roudet and turn the poggler 3 times to the left.
_AARGH!! Can’t you see that I don’t understand? Could you try to explain a different way?!!!
I think it’s simple. Some people can teach and others can’t. Teachers make the effort to get into your head to find out why you’re not understanding, and revise their explanations.
My mom does both. She has to tell me a whole story to get to the point, but she often cannot remember the exact name for an item, and wants to point rather than discribe where I need to look.
I think it boils down to how much attention you pay to what things.
I’m great at explaining things written down. Sometimes I think I’d be good at writing instruction manuals, I get such positive feedback.
But I am terrible when it comes to articulating my thoughts verbally. Even if I prep beforehand, I get tongue-tied and miss crucial details and rush through sentences. I don’t even like listening to myself when I do it.
My mom is a terrible, terrible over-detailer. I think of it as thick description. She is a professor in an engineering field, so it may be professional habit… or maybe she got into that sort of field because of her detailed habit of mind. Whatever. It drives me nuts.
+1
Years ago I was walking through a busy part of the city with a friend. There was a lot of traffic going by, a lot of loud people, and a strong wind. It was a noisy environment.
My friend turned to me and said something like “You know what I’ve always wondered? If it’s Friday and there’s snow and the moon is full, then…” She turned her face away, pointed off in some direction, and finished her question.
“What?”
“I said, I’ve always wondered, if it’s Friday and there’s snow and the moon is full, then…” She turned her face away, pointed off in some direction, and finished her question.
“Say it one more time.”
She got mad. “I said, I’ve always wondered, if it’s Friday and there’s snow and the moon is full, then…” She turned her face away, pointed off in some direction, and finished her question.
“I couldn’t hear the end. Once more?”
“You never listen to me! Friday! You know, Friday?!?”
“Yeah, I got it. Friday.”
“And snow? You know, snow?”
“Yeah, I heard you. Snow. Moon is full. On Friday. Got it. What happens on Friday when there is snow and the moon is full?”
“Well, I’m glad you finally listened.” She turned her face away, pointed off in some direction, and finished her question.
If there had been a desk, I would have headdesked.
My kids do this all the time.
I have been known to stop, crouch, take hold of their heads and turn them nose to nose to me before: “Now, say that again, exactly the same please”
I guess you’re not supposed to do this with fellow adults though
Well, since I had a special relationship with that particular adult, that’s exactly what I did.
I think it is a gift. Many very intelligent people can know a subject but only some can teach it.
Maybe more schools need courses in “How to talk good.”
Yeah, but why’d they change the name from Morganville to Shelbyville?
Stranger
Basically, TL;DH?
I think reading your audience plays a big role in this, too. Some people just love the sound of their own voices, and your glazed-over eyes and tongue lolling out of your mouth mean nothing to them.
Grr! I knew a girl in high school whose affirmative response to anything was “Basically” instead of “Yes” or “I agree.”
Me: God, I hate rainy days.
Her: Basically.
Me: Do you like spicy food?
Her: Basically.
Me: Do you want to go watch a movie?
Her: Basically.
Me: Okay, how is that a response to what I asked? What do you mean you “basically” want to watch a movie? In some respects, you do not, but in the fundamental ways you do? What kind of answer is that? Just say “yes!”
Okay, I never went off on her that way, but I probably should have.
Heh, that’s been a running joke among some of my friends. Whenever someone started telling a long, rambling story, one of us would go, “So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time,” and the person would know to get to the point.