Why do people hate success in others?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people proudly lay claim to liking a band before they were big and then just as proudly sneer that this was “before they sold out.” Uh, well, okay, it’s true that some bands do alter their sound to be more commercial, but I’d argue that not every success story is a “sell out.” I’ve heard people get all possessive about U2, about REM, about Barenaked Ladies… (forgive me for not knowing shit about currently huge bands)… and then refuse to like them any more when others like them. I realize that there is some validity to questioning art that suddenly appeals to the dubious tastes of the unwashed masses, but I don’t think popularity ought to immediately brand every band, every movie, every trend as worthless.

Also, why do people start hating famous people? Even I do this–before I even knew which songs were Brittney Spears’ I had fantasies about her involving plane crashes and twisted burning metal entwined with nubile teenybopper flesh… what’s with that? Why do we salivate waiting for the successful to fail? Ever noticed how happy people get when a second album crashes and burns? When the next big movie role is a flop? Honestly, having even one big hit is an accomplishment beyond the average schlub like me. Even if, say, Hootie and the Blowfish sink into obscurity, the fact that they had one kazillion-selling album kicks the ass of most aspiring pop musicians. So why the glee when bands like this end up the subject of “Look who is a loser now” VH1 special?

And is this an American thing? Or true elsewhere?

In a nutshell: What the fuck?

Lay some pop psychology on me, folks.

Individuality. It is trendy and popular in our current society to think for yourself and stand out. People want to fit in, but be an individual too. They want you to know that they liked the band earlier, know more about them than you, and are not following the crowd in liking them, especailly with long standingalmost classic bands like U2 and REM. That is my opinion anyway

As my pal Aaron, who is a phenomenal songwriter and terrific guitar player but puts bread on his table as an admission offical at Oberlin College, has said many times: “I wish to God someone had offered me the chance to ‘sell out.’ I’d have done it in an instant.”

IMHO, it’s because when a band is less known, it’s listeners tend to be (a) a tighter group; and (b) proud to be more “individualist” than the masses listening to the popular groups.

Example - no one really listens to Bare Naked Ladies at first, so their concerts are small and intimate, and the following is mostly people of similar demographics. Then along comes “One Week” and suddenly everyone is listening to them. Joe Alternative, who thought he was being unique is now seeing Susie Mainstream and Marge Adultcontemporary listening to “his” band and feels somewhat cheated on.

There is a similar flip-side to this called (and I’m going to destroy the spelling here) shaadenfreud (it’s German, sorry). This is the getting enjoyment from seeing others fail or meet misfortune. [Dennis Miller once did a great “Rant” on this topic.]

I think it’s schadenfreude and it’s a damn shame we don’t have a term for it in English. I know what you’re saying.

Hey, I used to work in Admissions. And I can tell you, that’s no way to put money on the table. Does Aaron tabledance on the weekends?

next weekend, go to a fish market, get two crabs and put them in a bucket. You’ll find it enlightening.