Why, oh why, did I bother to read a thread started by Com2Kid? Oh well. Great work, everyone else, especially Rexdart, Fenris, and [Polycarp**. It’s a pleasure to read your posts. I think i’ll go look for some pot-smoking Christian Conservatives now.
Bad hamsters! Bad!
It seems whenever I use the phrase “raging ass nugget,” the post gets doubled up. Perhaps the furry little rodents think I’m talking about food and get overexcited.
And Polycarp, well put.
stv
I’m hungry.
I like cheese.
hmmmm… the masses have spoken! free cheese for eveyone!!!
Stop trying to regulate me into eating cheese. I do not like cheese. Now I’m going to pass a law saying that you have to smoke pot when performing an abortion or recieving one. Also, all raging ass nugets must double up on their social security taxes.
dead0man
[absolute, total hijack] I just ate another deep-fried chocolate bar. I think I’ll go off and die of cholesterol poisoning now. Bye, everyone. [end total hijack]
My hijack is better than Lissla^2’s
HS my gf at the time and I were at my house when we noticed some Mormon’s going house to house.
Thinking quickly we got ready for them.
I open the door, wearing a full length purple cloak, slacks and a sports jacket.
This actually made them pause.
“Umm Hi I’m Elder… <blah blah blah>” - Them
“You’ve come about the souls?” - Me
“Errr yes?” -Them
<The lights in the staircase turn on (they were covered in red cellophane) so now I’m lit up by this arterial blood red lighting>
“We have much to discuss then. BRING THE CONTRACTS” -Me
<GF shows up wearing this skin tight demon costume [mmmmm]>
“We need the blood of a virgin” -GF
<We look at them, then back off>
I just have to say something to captain amazing. You are exactly the type of person the world needs more of. You and I disagree on abortion, however, you are calm, rational and able to accept that others can have different points of view. I like you 
To comkid, I am a Christain. I am not anti gay. Blanket generalizations rarely work.
A friend of mine was at his mother’s house, and he saw two J.W’s walking up the path. His mom wanted to pretend that they weren’t home, but he told her enthusiastically to invite them in. She did, and they asked him if he knew about Jehovah. He replied, "Well, yes, but do YOU know about Mormon?
He ran upstairs, got one of his two (free) copies of the Book of Mormon, ran downstairs, and began loudly explaining the pictures in the front, talking about how great Joseph Smith looked, and generally expostulating on the wonders of Mormonism. Then he offered them his other copy, and ran upstairs to get it. By the time he’d gotten back downstairs, they were halfway down the block.
BTW, He’s a recently converted Christian.
Also, CRorex, you win the hijack contest. That’s the best scaring-off-religious-group story I’ve ever heard.
I would disagree with you dead0man. I resent the endless litigation against cheese-eating, on the grounds that it is immoral. What I put in my mouth is my business and no one elses. I don’t tell you people that it’s immoral to eat oysters, do I?
Yeesh.
Lissla et al., one of the things my wife and boys used to enjoy immensely was being visited by Jehovah’s Witness or Mormon missionaries.
If the boys were around, they would put on this ad libbed deadpan routine of being sincere, devout, and misunderstood Satanists condemned for their beliefs that would have even the most sincere Christian rolling in the aisles.
If they were not, my wife would begin to evangelize the missionaries as to why they ought to become Episcopalians. It was my job in such a case to jump in with appropriate factual background and back up her impassioned plea to turn to the historically accurate way of following Jesus. We usually got into the Apostolic Succession and how their ministers didn’t have Jesus’s authority backing them as ours did. Other than laying that on a little heavy, we were sincere – but doing it in a perfect evangelical witnessing style.
A couple of J.W.'s called at my friend’s house where he, and another zoologist-type PhD-er were relaxing.
They got invited in (since there was nothing else my friend had to do that morning) and tried the old ‘Creationism vs Evolution’ arguments (the human eye, fruit flies, etc. - Creation Science).
Unfortunately my friend specialised in fruit fly evolution for his thesis, and the other person was an evolution fan.
At the end of the talk the younger J.W. was starting to agree with my friend, and almost converted over to the side of evolution. That was when the elder one said that they had to leave…now.
They never came back.
PT