Hey Freak, sorry you have to wait 6 months for all the paperwork to go through until you are able to enter Sweden. Life sucks sometimes, and we have to deal with it. I hope that this all goes smoothly for you, and that you don’t have any further problems. Have a nice day. 
Coldfire- I agree. Mariah’s singing reminds me of a coked-up parrot.
Bear_Nenno- I met her through the internet. She can’t come see me for reasons that I’d rather not go into. And my mother didn’t offer, so I’m not askin’.
ChiefScott- Ya lost me. “27 and a wup”? What does that mean? Ohhhh… I get it… so that’s what you navy guys are calling it nowadays. You perv.
JC: The problem is, Minneapolis has a lot of colleges. So in the summer there’s a lot of competition.
ssskuggiii- Thanks. Actually, I am having a nice day. I was pretty depressed yesterday, but I got it out of my system. Everything passes with time. Just gotta be careful not to waste too much of it.
Moderator’s Notes: Mr. F. Feely, as you may have noticed, I deleted one of your posts in this thread. It also was inappropiate. As you may, or may not know, threats of the nature of your post are illegal in this country. This board does not and will not tolerate behavior of this type. If you continue in this vein, I’ll delete this tread entirely. If you force us to go further than that, you will be banned without additional warnings.
I trust I’ll not have to admonish you again.
I can see the President thing, but the original thread title? That’s illegal in the US?
Just out of curiosity, what DOES that mean for my Mariah Carey thread title in the Pit? Don’t get me wrong, Unc, I’m not trying to put you on the spot here, I would just like to know where the line is.
I fully understand that the SD and its moderators will edit thread titles when they are illegal. But where does one draw the line?
The attitude in recent years over here (in the US) has been a bit less tolerant of threats, even implied threats, or those in jest.
I imagine that the SD is a bit leary of allowing them also.
I’m not a moderater but, I think of it like this. Your thread is obviously a joke. Freak’s is too, but threats agaisnt states or airports or government officials, are taken more seriously. Even if it was intended in jest, they might crack down. Whereas it’s extremely unlikely that Mariah Carey will give a shit.
Kinda reminds me of that old “the state” skit, the one where people kept getting carted off for threatening the president.
Well, it’s illegal in the U.S. to yell, “Fire” in public place. Take it from there. Now, I realize that FF was probably not serious, but how is anyone who happens to stumble across this to know that? You have seen for yourself, more than once, just how acrimonious some of the simple misunderstandings around here have become. You have to remember that everything you say here is public and presumably carries the weight of the written word. When you consider that and the litigious U.S. society, you can see where the Chicago Reader’s concerns lay. All we ask it that you exercise a little restraint.
Maybe this would be a good way to think of it. Consider, would you want what you post here printed in your local newspaper, on broadcast on the evening news? If the answer is no, then maybe you should reconsider you post. I hope this helps.
That’s good advice above, too. Thanks guys.
Thanks UncleBeer et al, it does help.
For what it’s worth: I’ve got a rear window sized “Fuck Mariah Carey” sticker on my car IRL
So I don’t have any problem communicating that thought here either 
Fair enough!
Hi future fellow countryman! (That is, if all goes well)
Some of my suggestions and personal takes on this one. First, try your bloody hardest to not go to the embassy with your application unemployed and homeless. That’s like asking for a refusal. If you have no way of finding a job in the US, make your love find one for you in Sweden. They will be a lot easier on you if you can show that you can support yourself, and not have your girlfriend support you. I don’t know where in Sweden you will live, but if it’s in one of the larger cities, you should be able to find a job. I must warn you though, although they claim that there are plenty of jobs, they’re all jobs which require serious qualifications. It is going to be even harder before you learn Swedish. Don’t get me wrong, you don’t need to know it to live here, since most people know enough to talk to you, but in order to find something else than a minimum wage job, you’ll need to study.
If all else fails, have you thought about going to school? I have no idea what that’s going to cost, but maybe it’s worth checking out.
In the meantime, hang in there. Love is worth the trouble you’re going through.
Yours truly,
soda
Hey, Freak, please don’t take your frustrations out on the SDMB.
I’ve put people up before, Freak. If you have no other options, email me. Yea, sure, it’s a little weird ‘cause I’m on the East coast and you don’t know me, but that’s never stopped me helping people get their shit together before. I’m not the only one, either. I’ve found that humans are a very kind species. Talk to more people about this. Someone will help.
If you’ve got nothing keeping you where you are, get the hell out. Go somewhere you can make better money faster. Don’t live on the street though, man. It’s too easy to forget why you’re still alive once you get to that point.
I hope this won’t offend you, but I really think that your bitterness is limiting your options. It really seems that you’re not going to be able to clearly see your options until you cool off a little and stop trying to convince yourself that you need to be angry. Not asking your mother for help just because she didn’t offer is not bright, man. That’s what we call foolish pride, which is something that the tone of you OP suggests you can’t afford right now.
Take a deep breath. The Swedes are not out to get you. They have rules. You dig their country because of the nature of their rules, right? Research the origin of that citizenship law. It might give you a better understanding of your current plight, and learning is a much better outlet of anxious energy than killing, pillaging and burning. Take this opportunity to learn and prepare for the move. Bend that anger to make yourself stronger, richer and wiser. Give yourself a really good start when you do make the move.
While we probably should be more afraid of Tommy Mottola than the Swedish government, we felt this thread as titled IN THIS FORUM was not appropriate.
your humble TubaDiva
Administrator
But, FF, the US Gov’t (according to a PIT thread you started) is SO bad, and the Swedish Gov’t is SO wonderful!?!
:rolleyes:
I’ve got a friend who left the US to live with her SO in Sweden several months ago. I never heard that she had any problems. I could send her an e-mail and ask for you. As far as I know, she isn’t working at all. She’s even come back here and they let her back into Sweden with no problem. I’ll ask her.
Greetings Mr. Freak,
I was in a very similar situation once. My ex-wife is Swedish and I am American so we had to deal with all the endless bureaucracy that went along with that. Before we were married, I lived with her in Sweden and worked for her father’s moving company in Norrkoping. To get my work permit and residency we went to the immigration office in Norrkoping to apply. After filling out some paperwork and going through some interviews it only took a week or so until they presented me with a pretty little sticker to put in my passport allowing me to work and live legally (resulting in many pieces of broken IKEA furniture). Now, things might have changed since then (1994) and it may depend on how long you can prove that you and your girlfriend have been together. So, you may want to ask her to check things out on her end. Keep in mind though that this is just one guy’s experience and I have no idea what the “official” residency requirements are. So please don’t go jumping on a plane because “Otis” said it would work out. They might not buy that one at customs. Best of luck to ya though man. Hope it works out.
Yeesh UncleBeer, way to overreact. FWIW, in the class I took on law they told me quite specifically that if you say something in a hypothetical context, i.e. “If they pissed me off that much, I would shoot the president.” Or “It’s a good thing I don’t want to shoot the presdent.” That’s not legally considered a threat. I didn’t say I was going to. I didn’t suggest that I was going to. I said that it was a good thing I didn’t post something saying I was going to. That can’t be construed as a threat. But I don’t really care that much, it’s not like I had my heart set on saying that. I also understand that if you feel it’s over the top, that’s the only justification you need. I’m just giving my point of view. So more power to ya.
And as far as changing the title, once again, I really don’t care that much. But I can see why you felt you needed to change it. In that instance, I was making a statement “I’m going to”. Also, this isn’t the right forum for that kind of title.
But why all this talk of deleting the thread and banning me? C’mon, I don’t deserve that. Lighten up.
That said, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause any problems.
Also, that “Damn SDMB can’t take the heat.” comment was a joke, I was just kidding. I didn’t mean any offense by it, and if you did take offense, then I apologize.
Oh yeah, Daniel, I’m not in the mood. I thought you would get that impression from reading the OP, but here’s an extra warning just to be fair.
Welcome to the club, <b>Freak</b>. Two months ago, my finace (now husband) was finally permitted to come to the US from Nepal. It took us 17 months to get the required permission. Oh, sure, INS says 3 months, but that’s only for INS here to process the forms once you collect all 5,237 of them. After that, the whole lot goes to the American Embassy in whatever country your intended lives, and they can take however long they want about it. In our case, it was 10 months and required my going to Nepal for three months to speed things up.
Now, due to a mistake on US Embassy’s part, it will probably be at least a year before we can bring my stepchildren here. Had the embassy done what it was supposed to do, they could have come immediately. But alas, they made a mistake which they admit to but refuse to correct, so we have to file all sorts of other forms and jump through numerous other hoops.
And don’t think it ever ends. It will be at least 2 years before my husband is granted even “conditional permanant residence”. Until then, he is not allowed to leave the country, which means we can’t visit his relatives or vacation abroad. After the two years, it will be another 3 years (minimum) before he can get unconditional permanent residence.
I don’t know who these people are who are suppposedly getting married under fraudulant circumstances to get into the US becasue “it’s so easy”. Easy my ass. You couldn’t pay me enough to go through all this crap.
I am not an immigration lawyer, but I and my wife have been in a similar situation, so I may be able to offer some insight. I am a Swede, and my wife is Chinese. We met in China when I was living there, in 1997. In 1998, I went to the Swedish embassy in Beijing to ask about Swedish immigration procedures. For reasons that I do not want to talk about in detail at a public message board, having her permanent residency application processed while she was still in China could have caused her and her family some political problems. Therefore, we really preferred to have all immigration matters processed once we were both in Sweden.
The diplomats I met at the Swedish embassy were very helpful. The part of the conversation that is of interest to you went something like this:
Me: So my girlfriend should apply for permanent residency in Beijing, before she goes to Sweden?
Swedish diplomat (SD): Yes, preferably.
Me: Well, as we talked about, it would be better if she could leave China on a tourist visa and then apply for permanent residency when she arrived in Sweden. Could you issue her a tourist visa, so that she can go to Sweden and apply for permanent residency there?
SD: Well, we can and will issue her a tourist visa, but the Invandrarverket [Swedish INS] prefers that immigration petitions are filed and processed before the immigrant leaves his or her home country.
Me: But they will process an application that is filed in Sweden?
SD: Of course. They have to.
Me: And it would be approved?
SD: Well, you can never guarantee that, but as a general rule, if she moves in with you in Sweden and you live together, they will grant her permanent residency.
In the end, I and my wife decided that moving to the United States (where I had lived before) was a better option for us, so we never followed through on our plan to move to Sweden–so I can’t tell you if what I was told is true. However, if you think about it, it does make some sense. Foreigners visiting Sweden meet and fall in love with Swedes all the time, so permanent residency petitions must be filed in Sweden fairly often. Even though the Swedish immigration authorities may prefer to process and decide on petitions before the alien arrives in Sweden, they must occasionally accept (and process) petitions filed by aliens who are already in Sweden. I just reviewed an online copy of the Swedish immigration law, and there is no clause that mandates that petitions should be filed outside Sweden. Of course, even if the application is accepted for processing, there is no guarantee that it will be approved.
So, you may be able to stick to your original plan. You could go to Sweden as a tourist, and apply for residency once you have arrived and settled in with your girlfriend. If the Swedish authorities grumble something about that you should have applied for residency before you left the United States, apologize profusely and say that you had no idea. You could also claim that you came only to visit her and get to know her better, but that you both now have fallen madly in love and have realized that you can not live without eachother. Either way, they will probably (but not certainly) grant you residency. And what is the worst that can happen? They may ask you to go back to the United States and file your petition here–but that wouldn’t really put you in a worse situation than you are already in (and it would actually give you a good reason for being out of a job, if you claim that you thought that it would be no problem applying for residency while in Sweden).
Of course, if you have already contacted the Swedish embassy (as opposed to just having visited their web site), then you can not claim ignorance or that you have no intentions to immigrate. You would have to file the petition and wait.
Note that it should make no difference to the Swedish immigration authorities whether you are married or not. Swedish immigration law treats all couples the same way, regardless of whether they are married or not. In practice, however, I assume that a marriage would help you demonstrate that your relationship is serious.
By the way, the “permanent residency” that you would get is in fact not permanent. It would have to be renewed once a year or so. After about 2 years, you would be eligible for a “permanent” permanent residency. (Well, I don’t know how to describe it…)
I really do not want to give you any advice that may land you in trouble. Before you decide what to do, I would strongly suggest that you or your girlfriend seek some advice from a Swedish immigration lawyer.