Youa re more than welcome. I guess you don’t personally know any smokers, though, or you’d know our deep dark secret: we are just folks. Just poor, pathetic, misguided folks who made a stupid decision when we were kids and now pay the price. We come in all flavors, just like any bunch of folks. The only thing that is the same about all of us is that we smoke.
You may have come across some militant smokers in your life, smokers who, in my opinion, feel so frustrated and stupid for having taken up such an insane habit, can’t just cop to it and feel the need to somehow defend or justify it. I’ve never been like that. The few times I quit, I learned immediately how offensive smoking is to those who don’t…the smell is overpowering, so I understand completely why non-smokers don’t like it around. (My fiance is always telling me after I come in from having a cig that I smell like I’m on fire.)
Jerry Seinfeld, in his book, made a very amusing (of course) observation about smokers: perhaps it’s a macho kind of thing, something like: “I have fire right in my face and it doesn’t bother me at all!”.
You sound like a guy that is going to be smoking again before long. Let me recommend a book to you…shit, I’ll have to go find it, it’s something like “The easiest way to quit in the world” or soemthing. Bottom line to it is that the whole book is spent disabussing you of yoru false beliefs about your smoking, such as the idea that it calms you, which it doesn’t. But I can’t do it here, you really should read the book. It will help you transform your thinking about it so you will be able to STAY a non-smoker. Taking one drug to be rid of another doesn’t sound like such a great idea to me.
Cat: thanks for the encouragement. I am reading the book I suggested to Satan because I do think it is crucial to change my mindset about smoking in order to successfully rid myself of it, never need it, never want it.
Eiss: I was at a party on the last day of school. It was an all-night pool party, and like most Hollywood kids in 1974, we were smoking pot and taking other drugs. Cigarettes were jsut part of the mix. I inhaled, I liked the look and feel of the cigarette in my hand. I used to love to watch my hand with a cigarette in it, isn’t that ridiculous? I didn’t feel sick, and I kept smoking all night. My lungs felt pretty thrashed the following day, but that iddn’t stop me.
Nowadays, it blows my mind to watch old TV shows and movies where it looks like EVERYONE smoked! The NEWSCASTERS smoked, for heaven’s sake! And in old movies, two people are puffing away, and then do a lip-lock. YAR! I never do any major kissing without thorough tongue and toothbrushing and gargling first! (One of the many things I hate about my smoking: it totally blows any spontaneous smooching with my honey!)
This is a good thing for me to be talking about…very inspriational.