Piloted by American wombats.
Wombats sneer at your puny cables.
Or at least they always have in the past at our poker games.
Here is my theory. There are undiscovered conspiracies out there, and the conspirators want to discredit those who would uncover them. So when two planes crashed into the WTC in view of millions of people in NYC, and 10s of millions on TV, they decided that they’d come up with the absolutely ludicrous theory that it was anything other than a terrorist attack from hijacked airplanes. This has been really successful, and now conspiracy theory buffs for anything else are lumped in with the clearly insane Truthers.
I have no idea who you’re fnord talking about. Nothing untowards happened fnord in Manhattan that you should concern yourself about. There were no, I repeat NO sentient potatoes involved in any capacity whatsofnordever.
That’s just what Devo WANTS you to think!
Well, of course not. Anyone with sense knows that there aren’t any such thing as potatoes in the first place, just disguised giant spiders that look like potatoes. Why else would potatoes have so many eyes?
It’s very clever actually. “They” caused WTC 7 to collapse precisely because it is inconsistent with the conspiracy. That way those silly people who believe the whole thing was caused by two hijacked aircraft crashing into WTC 1 and 2 would point at WTC 7 and say, “if it was a conspiracy, how come WTC 7 collapsed?”
It’s like the Babelfish. It proves God exists and therefore He doesn’t. WTC 7 collapsing proves it wasn’t a conspiracy and therefore it was. QED.
Let’s face it. There’s a very simple reason why WTC 7 was demolished. After WTC 1 and 2 were destroyed by nanothermite and C-4 coated rebar (triggered by a hurricane powered space laser) in the concrete central core, you can’t very well go calling WTC 7 WTC 7 anymore. There aren’t 7 buildings anymore! WTC 7 was all that was left. What are you going to do, call it WTC 1? I don’t think so!
They had to tear it all down and start over.
This is a parody of a couple of WTC-related discussions in Great Debates, but since it’s not a debate on its own I’ve moved it to the Pit.
You’re just trying to discredit the Truth! They’ve gotten to you, haven’t they?!
If you look closely, you can see the wombat puppet master pulling Marley’s strings.
You’re betraying your people! [Shakes fist]
Particularly not any clandestine or surreptitious ones.
whistles inconspicuously
I came up out of the subway Saturday to go to the Gene Siskel Film Center to see a couple of movies (including La Verite with a beyond gorgeous Brigitte Bardot…ooh lala!) and was confronted by a bunch of idiots waving “LOOK!! I’M AN IDIOT!” signs. Like Teabaggers, they deserve nothing but scorn and ridicule. I love this thread.
Cthulhu had awoken underneath the twin towers. Making them collapse was the only way to block the ancient one’s entrance into this world.
Mister Marley, tear down this tower! Ich bin ein wombat!
Well, since it’s in the Pit now and all, and since I was thinking of opening a thread in the Pit on this, let me just take this opportunity to speak to the various Truthers and pretend Truthers here on this board and out there in the greater universe. From the bottom of my heart I want you guys to know that I really, REALLY loath you people. With the heat of 10,000 suns. Of all the loony CT fuck heads, you guys definitely take the cake. You are loathsome toads, the scum of the earth, and some of the stupidest, most stubborn assholes ever to be spawned from under a rock or shit out in a nasty public port-a-potty.
From the bottom of my top, and with all the sincerity I can muster, I just wanted to say: fuck you, you slimy bastards.
Oh…and these days there are many decaffeinated beverages that are just as tasty as the real thing! Just thought you should know that.
-XT
That one I like! 
But the tastiness is just to hide the poison! They use decaffeinated beverages to get the people missed by vaccination and fluoridation programs.
Hold on a minute, has something happened to the WTC???
The Brits knew.