A surreal question to be sure, aside from the obvious reasons (i.e. “I would never kill someone” etc) why would you be a bad serial killer?
I would be a bad one because I am very habit-driven; eat at the same restaurants, drive to the same movie theaters, everything in my life fits a predictable pattern. It is how I remember things- to make a ritual of it. I think that if I was some serial killer police were on a manhunt for, they’d probably catch me pretty quick because of it. I think the clues they would find would easily link me to the crimes.
Sheer unadulterated laziness. I really don’t have the time nor the inclination to try and “hide” and “get away with it”. I really don’t. I am just too lazy to care.
I do an astonishingly bad job of predicting how other people will react to a situation unless I’ve deliberately and systematically watched people react to a highly similar situation — and the latter requires that I anticipate all the little situations that people might react to.
I think that would make me a bad candidate for serial killing because what constitutes obvious tracks to the people trying to track me down might not even register with me.
Also, I have a sufficiently unusual appearance that folks tend to remember seeing me. I don’t blend in.
If I killed someone, they’d find me, passed out by the body. Even if I managed to get out of there quickly enough, I’d be sending flowers to the family before they even knew the person was missing.
And of course the usual reasons, overwhelming guilt, regret, inner demons poking my ribs, the voices, etc.
I’m so absent minded that I know I’d be the guy who dropped his driver’s license at the crime scene. I picture myself an hour after the murder reaching for my wallet, realization sinking in, and saying, "Oh, crap! "
I couldn’t do it because I’m not quiet, single and I don’t pretty much keep to myself.
Also, I don’t like messes - Eeeeewwwww - look at all this blood. Now what am I supposed to do?
Although I will admit, if it weren’t for the fear of getting caught, there would likely be a few less people in this world…I’m looking at you, pointy-haired boss.
Well, I don’t meet the bed-wetting, fire-setting and pet-torturing trifecta of childhood signs, so I’m afraid this is yet another career I’m unqualified for.
I’m such an under-acheiver! :smack:
Because I can’t stand a screaming women. Assuming that my target would be women that is. The sound pisses me off and makes me want to run around in circles trying to get away.
I’m not a nice, quiet loner. I don’t want lampshades made of human skin. I do sometimes wonder what human flesh tastes like, but I can live without knowing.
Mostly, killing people would involve getting off my couch, and I’m against anything that makes me do that.
Actually, I think that I would be a very good serial killer. From what I have read, I share many of the traits of successful ones. I can seem perfectly innocent while engaging in evil, I am extremely sneaky, I rarely get caught, and I can keep my mouth shut like nobody’s business.
The reason that I am not already a serial killer is that I don’t have a target population that is motivating enough. Kids and most people that I deem “innocent” are out. I would need to find some “group” that generated enough hatred within. As it stands now, I can only think of individuals and not groups that have that effect on me. That would make me just a plain murderer and not a serial killer and what is the fun in that?