will guns protect me from jellyfish?

[Duckster]

@Mr.Excellent

I’m scared of jellyfish. Really scared. Jellyfish are scary. If I’m in the water with a jellyfish that’s large enough to shoot, would it be useful to shoot it? Or even possible?

If all you have is a hammer, everything you see is a nail. As mentioned guns won’t work her to achieve your desired outcome.

[Bootis]

I’m afraid not even not going to the beach will assure your safety. There have been multiple reports of raining jellyfish. It’s not surprising, they’re extremely light, often near the water’s surface. It’s very likely a jellyfish will fall on your head sometime while you’re about town. Maybe tomorrow? I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that dozens of children (and adults) have been killed while playfully catching raindrops in their mouth, but swallowing a falling irukandji jelly instead.

[engineer_comp_geek]

@Mr.Excellent

But I am going to Australia, maybe! For Worldcon!

In that case, you’ll need to watch this:

- YouTube

[YogSothoth]

Your only chance to avoid death by jellyfish is to kill yourself before they get to you. Sadly, that’s probably not even possible, as there are probably at least 3 jellyfish between you and the nearest gun

[BrightNShiny]

I’ve seen a nature documentary where a clown fish escaped a swarm of jellyfish by bouncing from the top of one jellyfish to the top of another, as if playing a jumping game. Perhaps this will work for you.

[Enter_the_Flagon]

@Mr.Excellent

But I am going to Australia, maybe! For Worldcon!

God, I hate jellies.

In that case, I strongly suggest that you not drink any liquids while there. Even the beer contains water, which itself is likely to contain tiny hidden jellyfish.

Also, do not attempt to wash your hands, nor take a bath or shower, unless wearing a full wetsuit.

[DrDeth]

You can wear protection, a wetsuit will do or even a rash guard against most jellies.

I got stung once, on a CA beach. Not bad, kind of like a beesting.

[kopek]

@Mr.Excellent

(This is inspired by a thread in GD - I originally asked the question facetiously, but I’d actually like to know.)

I’m scared of jellyfish. Really scared. Jellyfish are scary. If I’m in the water with a jellyfish that’s large enough to shoot, would it be useful to shoot it? Or even possible?

That is:

1.) Will most modern handguns fire whilst wet? What about whilst submerged?
2.) Is a dead jellyfish still dangerous? Will a bullet even kill a jellyfish, or just pass through harmlessly?

1. Load it under water and make sure to get as much air out of the system (especially the barrel) as you can. Do not use one of those trick handguns that will fire a .410 shotgun shell. Shotshells, having their own built in air obstruction, can cause firearms to fail in the not-so-nice fashion.

2. Don’t know. Never shot a jelly fish. I have gone to Vermont in the past for their “bang-ling” (firearms season) on rough fish (carp and suckers) and I’ve been to a couple clam shoots. But never jelly fish.

[Martini_Enfield]

@Enter_the_Flagon

In that case, I strongly suggest that you not drink any liquids while there. Even the beer contains water, which itself is likely to contain tiny hidden jellyfish.

Also, do not attempt to wash your hands, nor take a bath or shower, unless wearing a full wetsuit.

And make sure you buy your wetsuit brand-new, still in the plastic wrap. Ensure that it has been transported to the store solely by air or road transport, and that it’s never been anywhere near any sort of liquid at all. Only then can you be reasonably sure you’re safe from the ever present threat of [del]International Communism[/del] TINY JELLYFISH!

Seriously though, as long as you’re not swimming during stinger season at beaches known to be stinger “hot-spots”, and make sure you’re wearing a full-length “Steamer” wetsuit or anti-stinging suit when you go in the water anywhere that stingers might be (ask one of the Surf Lifesavers on duty; they’ll be able to help you out). Wear good shoes when on the beach, and generally don’t swim outside the flags, and you should be fine. You’re not going to encounter them in your soup at a restaurant, or coming out of the taps, or anything like that. It’s like being scared of crocodiles- as long as you don’t go swimming alone in remote Northern Territory or Far North Queensland rivers, there’s not much to worry about.

[Isamu]

By staying out of the water you can avoid most jellyfish other than (i) the aforementioned rain-borne one’s (which we call ‘jellies from heaven’) and the (ii) land jellies - they’re smart so don’t answer the door to someone you don’t know.

[Khaki_Campbell]

@Enter_the_Flagon

Also, do not attempt to wash your hands, nor take a bath or shower, unless wearing a full wetsuit.

He’ll really mix in with the local population

[naita]

@Mr.Excellent

So, basically, what I’m getting from this thread is that jellyfish are like the liquid metal terminators of the ocean. They can’t be shot, they can’t be reasoned with, and even torn to pieces they will threaten you. They will just keep coming until you’re dead.

This isn’t helping me get over my fear of jellyfish, people.

Let me try a helpful approach then. Your statement “They will just keep coming until you’re dead”, is false. Jellyfish aren’t interested in you, will not, and mostly cannot, follow you, and, as has been pointed out, are 99.99% unable to kill you. You can avoid the 0.01% by not swimming in certain tropical and subtropical areas.

[Martini_Enfield]

@naita

Let me try a helpful approach then. Your statement “They will just keep coming until you’re dead”, is false. Jellyfish aren’t interested in you, will not, and mostly cannot, follow you, and, as has been pointed out, are 99.99% unable to kill you. You can avoid the 0.01% by not swimming in certain tropical and subtropical areas.

Namely, most of the coast of Australia.

And Jellyfish are actually capable of killing people, FWIW.

[kombatminipig]

I just came here to post this.

[Princhester]

All this talk of shooting the bastards is fatally flawed and not just because shooting won’t work: they’re not like sharks, you can’t see them coming. They’re too small and transparent. So even if you had a gun capable of killing them, and even if killing them would stop them stinging you, you can’t shoot what you can’t see.

Also, I went out to dinner at a Chinese restaurant. There were even jellyfish on one of the serving plates. I guess they were meant to be there since they were chopped up, covered in soy sauce and cooked. Quite nice actually.

[Tapioca_Dextrin]

@Princhester

you can’t shoot what you can’t see.

It’s easy. The OP needs to buy an umbrella and modify it by adding four or five mini to the top, along with a million round ammo supply. With some half way decent design, the umbrella will spin around rapidly, mincing all jelly fish within a twenty foot radius. I can’t foresee a downside.

[Leo_Bloom]

I think the clear ones are mostly harmless, though. Mostly.

Mostly?

They only come out at night, mostly.

[Lust4Life]

I for one welcome our new Jellyfish overlords.

[Machine_Elf]

@Martini_Enfield

Namely, most of the coast of Australia.

And Jellyfish are actually capable of killing people, FWIW.

And even if they don’t kill you, they can really, really, REALLY hurt. See Irukandji syndrome:

@wikipedia

Because the Jellyfish is very small, and the venom is only injected through the tips of the nematocysts (the cnidocysts) rather than the entire lengths, the sting may barely be noticed at first. It has been described as feeling like little more than a mosquito bite. The symptoms, however, gradually become apparent and then more and more intense in the following 5 to 120 minutes (30 minutes on average). Irukandji syndrome includes an array of systemic symptoms including severe headache, backache, muscle pains, chest and abdominal pain, nausea and vomiting, sweating, anxiety, hypertension, tachycardia and pulmonary edema.[4][10][11] One unusual symptom associated with Irukandji syndrome is a feeling of “impending doom”.[12] Patients have been reported as being so certain that they are going to die that they beg their doctors to kill them to get it over with.[13] Symptoms generally abate in 4 to 30 hours, but may take up to two weeks to resolve completely.[

And yes, they can sting after they’re dead. Back in the '50’s, my dad and his friends were driving on the beach, running over beached jellyfish with the car. At some point in the future the car had (unrelated) mechanical trouble; on a nice hot day my dad, wearing only shorts, lay down under the car and started banging on something. Jellyfish stingers rained down on him and stung the bejeezus out of him. Fortunately nothing like Irukandji, but bad enough that he wriggled out from under the car in a hurry and ran for a shower.

Not all jellyfish are deadly or even terribly painful. I was SCUBA diving in the Cayman islands about ten years ago, and we had to descend through a school of rather small jellyfish. Our dive master had us smear our exposed skin with vaseline; this, plus a relatively rapid descent through the swarm, was said to be enough to keep us from getting stung (much?). I don’t recall any of us having any symptoms at all.

[elbows]

I just recently watched a disturbing documentary, (sorry can’t recall the name!), about jellyfish. It was about the fact that, with the oceans warming, they are multiplying, literally blooming in the millions, in a way that scientists have never witnessed before.

Not only that, they are migrating further north than they have even been seen before, including a report of one off of England. Not a lot of research has been done on these creatures and scientists are now scrambling to learn all they can, y’know, before they are everywhere.

Sorry to break the bad news, better stick to baths, I suppose.

Found it, it’s called ‘Jellyfish Invasion’, from Wild Docs. Not for the faint of heart.