Perhaps people won’t just launch into tests without considering all of the potential consequences. People with a family history of a disease have had these dilemmas having to decide whether to get tested and to know whether they have the “bad” gene(s) or not. I don’t think people are counselled at all before sending in for these “pop” DNA services, are they? Perhaps they need to be. If you’re somebody who will take something like this in your stride, fine, if it will completely rock your world and security, perhaps the answer is not to get the test.
(personally, I don’t “get” the “it’s not my real father” thing. I think the people who raise you and look after you are your parents, regardless of the biology. The biology matters if you need a bone marrow transplant or something, otherwise “meh”. People have children via in vitro, or sperm donation or adoption or whatever and the baby isn’t ‘theirs’ biologically, but I think they are the parents. To me, it always seemed a bit insulting to the adoptive parents when an adopted child went off to find their “real” parents.).
I watched a documentary on the tv (Little White Lie) about a young woman who found out her father wasn’t her biological father, but her biological father was black and she looked different to the rest of the family. I think her mother should have told her because she lived with being “odd” her whole life, but if you “fit” your family, it might be better not to delve into biology if it’ll just upset everybody. Generally speaking, all of this spying and tracking doesn’t make people happy, does it?)
What is the social benefit of mandatory paternity testing? If we have two people, and both of them step up and say they are the parents, there’s no reason for the rest of us to insist they prove it.
DNA doesn’t establish legal parenthood, if it did then adoption would be impossible. Nobody made me take a test when my kids were born. I just put my name on the line, and nobody else showed up to dispute my claim. The legal system only gets involved in actual existing disputes, not potential disputes that may or may blnot arise decades later.
Pretty soon, DNA sequencing will be a standard normal procedure to perform on all babies shortly after birth (or maybe even in utero). Not for paternity, but for all the medical issues it helps you anticipate and be aware of.
A few years ago I was hospitalized for three days due to what ended up being an allergic reaction to an antibiotic I was taking. The diagnosis was confirmed a month or so after the fact via genetic testing.
When genetic testing gets cheap enough, it will be done in advance. They could have already known it would be dangerous to give me that drug. And there are thousands (millions?) of other genetic quirks where forehand knowledge is medically relevant.
I’m sure there will be small groups that choose not to do the testing, but most people will.
There’s a big difference between the following scenarios:
Biological father (a) knows he’s the father or (b) doesn’t care and accepts parenthood.
Non-biological father (a) knows he’s not the bio father or (b) doesn’t care and accepts parenthood.
Biological father doesn’t know he’s the father and can’t accept parenthood even though he might want to.
Non-biological father doesn’t know he’s not the biological father and accepts parenthood of a child he wouldn’t have parented given the knowledge.
I think most people would argue that scenario 3 and 4 are at least a moral grey area and probably a social negative. Limiting those cases is a social good. Scenario 1a and 2a aren’t affected by mandatory testing. 1b and 2b are only affected if the man wants to remain in a state of blissful ignorance. Is that enough to balance scenarios 3 and 4? I would say probably not, but maybe it is.
What percentage of affairs result in illegitimate children?
Of that set, what percent never gets found out about through other means besides Ancestry.com?
Of that set, how many completely oblivious ones are going to take a DNA test?
My guess is this is not going to change change cheating in any way. It’s now easier to catch a cheater, and get caught, without DNA tests, than ever before, and people still cheat. People that cheat are either not thinking clearly about consequences due to infatuation, or don’t care in the first place.
My feeling is these things have a way of getting out. I do have a half sister from an affair. That was caught when her non-biological father got a fatal disease and she could not donate. Yes, it was through technology that she found out, but not Ancestry.com. However, all 4 of the adults knew practically the whole time decades ago due to some sloppily handled love letters.
I don’t know the answers to the first few questions. I agree that they’re interesting and relevant.
The answer, in not very long, is going to be almost everyone gets a DNA test. At birth. Automatically. Again, not to catch cheaters. When we figured out blood types, that made it a bit easier to catch cheaters, but we don’t blood type babies to figure out who their fathers are. It’s just a side effect.
This is the wrong analysis. If it is now easier to catch cheating, then do fewer people cheat? That’s the question to answer. I don’t know the answer to that, either, but it’s not sufficient to show that some people still cheat.
The best data I have found so far shows that infidelity is increasing. Which is consistent with your claim. But of course there are other social changes going on to. I’m not sure how you can separate the effects of changing attitudes toward sex and marriage from things like how much easier it is to catch cheaters. I’m sure some clever statistician is working on it.
What happens when it’s not just easier to catch a cheater, but practically automatic?
DNA tests still won’t catch a majority of cheaters, since I reckon a VAST majority of infidelity does not result in illegitimate children (plus we have to factor in abortion). Maybe people will be more careful to use birth control, maybe not. I still don’t think people are thinking rationally when they cheat if they actually care about their marriage. I’m not a cheater, but I imagine that if I were I’d either be so infatuated that I wouldn’t be thinking clearly about consequences, or so checked out of my relationship that I really wouldn’t care that much if it got found out.
I wonder if some cheating is done with the notion of becoming pregnant when the legal spouse can’t provide viable sperm - a sort of unwitting sperm donation. Or even witting, if the third party is willing.
I suspect some cases of sperm/egg/embryo/infant adoption are coming to light that in an earlier era would have remained a deep, dark secret… but then the social stigma that used to attach to such things has largely disappeared.
Certainly, if the Maury Povich Show is anything to go by, reliable paternity testing has not stopped folks from fathering children and trying to walk away, or conceiving children then trying to find a baby-daddy to provide financial support. You’ve got men fathering children and insisting the kid isn’t theirs, men insisting the kid is theirs despite the mother’s denial, and mother’s wanting multiple men tested because they aren’t sure which of the studs they slept with in a given month is the bio-dad.
Things will change, but it probably won’t be a totally radical upheaval.
Maybe people will begin to understand that it’s not whose sperm it is, it’s who has put in the time and emotion, which determines who the real (father) is. Maybe.
It is unfortunate that your relative got an unwelcome surprise, but I see no reason to “imagine, imagine, imagine” all kinds of broken families and social upheaval based on your anecdote.
If you want to cheat, you are 729,645,311,141 times more likely to get caught in the present day by your own stupidity than by some stupid geneaology trace.
And 23 and me is just another Theranos waiting to happen.