Gather 'round brothers and sisters. Let me tell you of this evil that’s creeping into the minds of our children through their ears.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, but listening to music in your car, brothers and sisters, is a far greater danger.
No, I do not speak of music from the streets of Compton.
No, I do not speak of music that is either hip or hop.
Yes, I speak of the Devil’s own music. Celtic music.
Music couched in the lilting accents of the emerald isle.
Evil that disguises itself behind bodhran drums and penny whistles.
Why just this morning, brothers and sisters, many young women were taken by their lily-white hands and lead down the paths of fornication. Whiskey and the ol’ black rum were poured morning and night down the throats of men who sang casually of its demonic effects. Grandmothers, wives, and young fiances were killed and sunk into rivers, streams, and cold graves. Young men marched off to war, never to return.
The evils of country music cannot even approach the high body count that Celtic music records in the guise of entertainment.
Music is a product of its environment and given that the history of the Celtic peoples (especially the Irish) is filled with poverty, disease, famine, alcoholism, violence, massacres, and “(y)oung men marched off to war, never to return,” the high body count from Celtic songs is not surprising. What is surprising that somehow Celtic music didn’t turn into all-dirge all of the time.
Or, if they do return, it’s without an arm, without a leg, as an eyeless, noseless, chickenless egg that’ll have to be put with a bowl to beg.
Yet, occasionally you can find tips on staying a pure woman -
“Girls when you’re courtin’ take my advice,
Never let an Irish man kiss you more than twice.”
The OP was inspired (tounge in cheek, by the way) by my first realizing that Garth Brooks’ greatest hits album having no less than four killin’s in it. Listening to GBS this morning, I realized that country music hasn’t got nuthin’ on Celtic for sinning.
Besides GBS, I’ve got some Irish Rovers, Bothy Band, Clannad, Loreena McKennitt & Claddagh Ring (Wichita local band) in my collection. I have to admit to liking the overall variety & energy of GBS the best even though they’re not truly Celtic.
Bluegrass & Celtic mix? Considering the roots of Bluegrass, it doesn’t suprise me that The McKrell’s mixture works.
Not a big surprise that Celtic music and bluegrass have a lot of similarities, as great swaths of the southeastern US were settled by Irish and Scot immigrants. (Great Big Sea is a Newfoundland group, and a lot of Irish and Scots settled there, too.)
I hear ya. Some Celtic music is wonderful and intricate and puts the Lilt right back in yer Kilt, but other sorts , like the recently trotted out “Celtic Woman”, on PBS, is jaw-droppingly irritating.
Gotta quote a friend, who, in a newspaper music review of “Celtic Woman”, wrestling with his own very red-headed Celtic heritage, trying to find some appreciation, finally gave up and said: "I could here the Lucky Charms Leprechaun upon my shoulder, saying, “It’s magically repetitious!”
Check out Old Blind Dogs and Kornog for some good ole’ fratricide, stepmothers feeding their husband his favorite daughter in a pie, young mothers tempted into leaving their husband and infant child only to be drowned at sea by a monstrous hundred foot tall Satan and other wonderful little ditties.
Oh yeah, and if there is a pen knife mentioned, someone’s gonna die.
I like “Celtic Women” but if one dislikes the music, any straight man or gay woman could easily mute it, put on their own favorite music, and still find the video to be
magically delicious!.
Are there any good rock/metal celtic bands? The only ones I know are Thin Lizzy and Gary Moore, neither of which have had a celtic rock album out in years. I’d really like to find more stuff like Lizzy’s Black Rose, or Moore’s Wild Frontier.
