Good Christ, I love cleavage. I’ve never been called to task for unwanted ogling or motorboating, either. Clearly, I must either have the knack or have the cleavage aimed at me.
Summertime cleavage
Moistly pressed together
Blinds me like the sun
Ah, those young’uns - no manners. They’re much more circumspect these days.
Men can be so accommodating.
We’ve never done this thread before.
You’re almost there; you need one more syllable in the second line and that will be a first-rate haiku. Call the New Yorker. 
because a woman’s mind is a funny place, especially when she’s looking for shoes
My ex was double D and wore them as much out in the air as possible and always said “what is the matter with that guy staring at me like that. What would he think if I stared at his balls?” etc. Never met a woman who wasn’t like that. Nor a woman who wasn’t envious of other women who had more to show. One of our biggest sellers when I had a T-short shop on Ft Lauderdale Beach was “Why don’ t you stop staring at my chest pretending you are reading my T-Shirt.”
Are you afraid of my watermelon-ness?
Yeah, you don’t know many women.
Sometimes cleavage is just accidental. I avoid low cut blouses, but something modest will reveal cleavage if you reach for something with both arms stretched out, or bend over to pick something up. Treat a stranger the way you would your mother, sis, or daughter. We’re not all trying to flash.
I like that. That’s actually some good practical advice for going about your day.
Well, except for the sister part. My sister likes it when I look. She’s into that.
I kid, I kid. I don’t even have a sister.
OP, just buy yourself some damn sunglasses. Christ.
That’s a good idea. And if you add a walking stick and a guide dog to the costume, you can even get away with some groping by “accident”, in elevators and supermarket lines.
In high school we called that “flobbing” and any girl with more than inverted navels got flobbed – often.
Lightweight.
Isn’t that sexual assualt?
Which part? The fake-blind-guy groping trick, the high school shenanigans, the sister-ogling, or the Attack of the Boobs?
You need to be more specific.
Join date, yup; number of posts; yup.
Oh Zeldar, I don’t want to believe this about you. 
Sorry, I didn’t make it clear. I wasn’t in on the flobbing (nor did I get flobbed – thank God) but the flobbing was a ritual before class almost every day as kids were making their way to home room and the halls were crowded. There were a few (maybe 5-10) flobsters, but I didn’t have the nerve to be one.
And in those days if there were any specific laws in the sexual assault realm they were not heavily enforced among high school kids that I ever heard about.