Working in Ms. P's shadow

The BBQ Pit
1

I am a student teacher at a keyboard program that teaches beginner piano. There are also 3 or so other student teachers, and combined with the Master Teacher, teach local kids how to play the piano.

One of the other student teachers, Ms. P, was unable to teach on Mondays. Since I needed students anyway, we basically ‘transferred’ the students. The transition was fairly smooth- the studio room they were taught in was exactly the same, Ms P talked to me about the students she had and various nuances about them. I was actually pretty excited, because two of Ms P’s former students are members of the tutoring center I also work at (i.e. I work with them twice a week anyway and had known them for over a year at that point). I was really looking forward to being their tutor AND piano teacher and getting to spend half the week working with them.

However, it seems that Ms P was well loved by her students, and had built up such a reputation (sheesh, you’d think she was the friggin Virgin Mary the way people gushed about her :rolleyes: ) that a lot of parents were highly dissatisfied of me.

Was it because I was inexperienced, a male teacher, a single guy who still lived with his parents? No, none of that was a big deal to them. They simply didn’t like me because I wasn’t Ms P :rolleyes:. What was kind of shocking was some parents were SO UNHAPPY that I wasn’t Ms P, that I wasn’t about to dress in drag and put on a wig and talk in a high pitched giggly voice to emulate Ms P that they thought it would be better for their children to GIVE UP PIANO COMPLETELY rather than be taught by someone who was NOT Ms. P :mad:. I really thought I could get beyond this “We liked Ms P better” bullshit, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Now I know a lot of people reading this are going to think that I’m just being an insecure prick who is whining about some fucking pointless popularity contest at my job. But that isn’t why I’m mad. I could care less about that (and good riddance to the parents who are gonna quit over something so shallow! :mad: ) what grates me is that I am being evaluated in comparison to Ms. P. I am Ms. P’s “replacement” and I get the same strife replacement/substitute teachers probably get; parents unable to accept this degree of change and hence lose sight of their child’s actual progress.

When I told some parents “<child> has to spend a little more time on this before he/she gets it” sometimes the parent will say something asanine like “Well Ms P never used to put us through that. Ms. P would only make us spend a week on something. Ms. P gave hugs and volunteered and didn’t eat red meat and blahblahblahblah” essentially using me as en excuse for their own laziness for not making sure their child practices and puts forth the effort and time required to learn the piano. I enjoy teaching piano, but I swear its a constant uphill battle with parents sometimes, and just when I think I’ve reached the summit, I look up to see I’ve got an even steeper incline looming ahead. :frowning:

2

You know, if you ask Mrs. P about her early days of teaching, I bet she has some identical stories. It does suck though. The only thing that will help is time and further experience.

3

If they’re going to act immature, maybe you should tell them the same thing that you say to kids when you’re babysitting; “Well, Ms. P isn’t here right now; I am.”

4

That made me chuckle, because that is actually one of the things I do to cope.

“Children, the days of happy piano blizz with Ms. P are over,”

BOW DOWN AND TREMBLE AT YOUR PIANO OVERLORD!
:smiley:

5

There’s going to be some strife with a changing of the guards. Parents don’t like you? Fuck 'em. Let them quit, so that some new slots open up for the students you can actually teach.

Sometimes teaching has its success stories. My friend’s husband used to gush over the bass player in his band. He went on and on about how great he was. Then I met the bass player. Turns out he was my student 20 years ago.

6

Here’s what you do to win their respect.

Every time a student plays a wrong note, you administer an electric shock. When they complain, and talk about how Ms. P didn’t shock them, you say “Oh, yes, well, would you rather PLAY THE BASSOON!” and then point at your bassoon student, who is suspended by a chain over a tank full of hungry sharks, and gets lowered several inches towards the water with each wrong note.

God I love Stewie…

7

I, for one, welcome our new piano overlord.

(runs from thread)

8

[Doctor Evil] Sharks with Lasers[/Doctor Evil]

9

My first piano teacher cut some of his fingers off with a band saw while building a harpsicord.

My second piano teacher died of cancer.

My third piano teacher died of cancer.

My fourth piano teacher lost several fingers to epillepsy.

My fifth piano teacher’s fingers siezed up with arthritis.

At that point I took up guitar,whereupon my guitar teacher found Jay-sus, developed a southern accent, and moved into the woods to take up carpentry.

I finally tried the harmonica, but my harmonica teacher up and died from a heart attack.

If you really want matters taken care of, just sign me up for a lesson from Ms. P.

10

Incubus: * what grates me is that I am being evaluated in comparison to Ms. P.*

Unfair, but inevitable. Everybody who has a good relationship with a teacher feels a certain resentment towards somebody who appears to have “displaced” or “replaced” the teacher. Especially where the student is not in a passive role like just sitting and taking notes, but actually has to respond and perform, and has got accustomed to the trust they felt for their former teacher to support them.

I studied under a great yoga teacher for several years, and whenever there was a substitute teacher in a class or special workshop, I had to consciously remind myself not to dislike her. And this is yoga, where we’re supposed to be all aware and compassionate and all!

Tip for teachers wanting to smooth a transition of this sort: It is often helpful for the former teacher to attend the first class/lesson along with the new teacher, and introduce the new teacher to the student(s) in a warm and supportive way. This associates the new “leader” with the old “leader” in the minds of the pack, er, students, and helps them transfer their trust and loyalty.

Similarly, since you’ve talked to the former teacher about your students, it might be a good idea to drop her name occasionally in lessons, in a positive way: “Ms. P told me that you sight-read really well” or whatever.

Whaddya want, people are to a large extent pack animals when it comes to leadership roles, and don’t always adapt to leadership changes very well. Keep trying, and don’t give up your own teaching standards and goals, and eventually you’ll find that your students are just as irrationally biased and resentful against teachers who attempt to replace you! :slight_smile:

(Yikes Muffin, that sounds bad! But if I may ask, are you sure about the teacher who lost fingers due to epilepsy? How come? It wasn’t something else like diabetes or meningitis? I’ve never heard of epilepsy requiring amputations, although of course IANAD.)

11

Mrs. P could probably have done a better rant.

With giggly emoticons.

12

Sory, I had a brain fart – it was diabetes, not epilepsy. He lost fingers, some toes, and developed one heck of a vision problem.

13

My first job with my shiny new BA in Music with Teaching Certificate was as a high school choir director. I ran into the exact same problems you did. I’d post more about them, but every time I think about these memories
THE BITTERNESS RISES.
I managed to claw my way out of that place, and into an elementary school where I was replacing a teacher who had a nervous breakdown mid-year. The parents were just happy that a new music teacher could be found so soon. I stayed there for six years.

While I don’t believe in karma, sometimes I wonder…
:slight_smile: