I make the world’s best Margarita. They’re famous. You can too. Here’s how:
Get a bunch of limes. You want yecchhy looking ones, yellow ish with spots, going somewhat soft, small and sickly looking. Trust me on this.
Abuse the limes. Beat on them. Roll them around. Call them “bitch.”
Cut the limes in half (you need about 1 1/2 limes per drink if they’re small) and squeeze the juice into a glass using your hand. Squeeze the crap out of them. Pick out the seeds, but let a little pulp get in there.
Frost your glasses - Any old glass won’t do. I use huge brandy snifters. They’re like goldfish bowls. Fill them with hot water. Dump it out, and put them in the freezer for five or ten minutes.
Dump your lime juice in the blender - 'nuff said.
Add an equal amount of Triple Sec and Tequila, so that it’s one part lime juice, triple sec, and tequila each. Good tequila is a must. I like Two Fingers, or Cuervo gold, though other fine brands are acceptable. If you wish, you can experiment with other orange based liqueurs besides triple sec. I like Joaquins, not sure why.
Add two parts of chopped ice, and turn blender on for 1-2 minutes.
Remove snifters from freezer and salt them. Rup the lip with a lime peal, and touch it into a tray of coarse salt. Less is more.
Shave some ice with a cheese grater, or chop it finely in a cuisinart. Drop a small handful into each snifter, so it forms a cone.
Pour contents of blender into snifter.
It’s a small drink in a big glass, served ice cold. The best part is when you’re finished, and you get a mouthful of that packed slush, and just suck the juices out of it.
Well, normally I prefer mine rocks or straight up, but I’m not too picky, and that sounds right delicious now. Have you got an extra glass and some sand? (for my toes, not the drink)
Worst margarita I ever had: I was at a party in college, and the “margaritas” consisted of tequila and margarita mix poured over ice cubes. Okay, typical fare for a college party, but some rube had gotten jalapeno flavored tequila. I don’t know if there are any circumstances under which artifically jalapeno flavored tequila would be worth drinking, but it certainly is not when mixed into margaritas. I tasted just exactly like melted plastic.
I’ve been posting that recipe on this board for the past three years. OK, I don’t do 'em frozen - but the recipe is the same: Equal parts Lime Juice, Orange Liquor, and Tequila. Shake with ice, pour over ice. Drink like you’re a horny wood nymph on Viagra.
And get this - ya gotta try it with top-shelf Tequila and either Grand Marnier or Cointreau. Yes, it does make a difference. Mr. Athena and I have put many, many hours of research into this. Tequila with small red sombraros on the cap and discount Triple Sec is NOT the same as Herradura and Cointreau.
Lime quality matters, too. Sometimes we get very very bitter & sour limes. When that happens, you have to mellow them with just a touch of orange juice. Best, though, is when you get perfect limes, and treat them like Scylla says.
What Athena said. I, personally, don’t care for tequila (the drink, I like the Doper) but I’ll drink a top-shelf margarita. Cheap stuff is for college students, and that I’m not anymore.
A key element of an ideal “rocks” margarita is to use a shaker full of ice and then strain the marg into a glass containing its own fresh ice. This keeps the dilution factor down, and helps concentrate the flavors. Also, play with the idea of silver vs. gold tequila. Silver tequila usually yields a slightly dryer marg and gold slightly richer. And, on the subject of limes, if you get limes that are bitter, go ahead and add 1/4 - 1/2 teaspoon of sugar to each marg making sure that it dissolve before it’s poured. Now GO DRINK!
Back to me, Athena:
Coldfire, aren’t you in Tequila-forsaken Amsterdam or somethin’? What you doin’ talking about Tequila? Go back to yer stroppenkoofers or whatever ya drink over there.
Who wants to give me a kiss
(Seriously what the hell is that, The Odyssey for idiots?)
I’ve had 'em with the Cointreau, Grand Marnier, etc. and guess what? They ain’t Margaritas! They’re something different! They may be better, but they lack the soulful honesty of a true Margarita which can only be born of triple sec.
Part of the charm of the margarita is that it’s a lowbrow sort of drink. It benefits from good to excellent tequila, but you don’t want to go too crazy or too hoighty toighty, because there is a law of diminishing returns here.
You use too good a tequila, and instead of enjoying the margarita, you’re wishing you hadn’t ruined good tequila by freezing it up with juice in a blender.
At a certain point in quality (anything above two fingers IMO) you oughtta be drinking your tequila straight to do it justice.
Again thanks! More importantly, you remind me that I do have some good sipping tequila tucked away here somewhere, and some limes. Excuse me just a moment, please.
No sugar. No silver tequila. Ever. If you don’t have good limes, drink something else.
I’ve personally found little difference between shaking them and blending them as I’ve describe. I blend them to get tha nice frosted bubbles on the top.
The reason I use a huge glass with shaved ice in it is so that when you pour the Margarita into it, the ice in the snifter catches the ice in the drink. It just strains through it.
If your freezer is very cold and you chilled your glasses, it shouldn’t dilute very much.
The trick to avoiding dilution in cold drinks is to use either a lot of very cold ice, or none at all. Use a lot and it keeps the temperature and melting down for a while.
My margarita is an honest margarita dammit.
Ah, Tequila Corralejo, a bottle of reposado I inherited from a Mexican friend when he moved from Frankfurt to Madrid. (although my bottle is blue, not the brownish color in the link, so it may not be the exact same)
It occurs to me while playing around with this thread and sipping my second margarita of the night, that I may be doing a disservice and giving a wrong and bad impression.
For my entire adult life, experience has shown me that those that drink to the point that they make fools of themselves and lose control are either immature idiots or have a serious problem.
Enjoy a good drink. Have fun, but moderation is always the key.
I now return you to pseudo-drunken shenanigans.
