Evidently invasive Black and White Tegu Lizards, a native of Argentina and other South American countries, has gotten loose in the Southeastern US. It has no predators there, eats the eggs of ground-nesting birds, and can grow to a length of four feet. It’s been reported in Georgia, South Carolina, and (of course) Florida (especially the Everglades, home to other invasive species). They think pet tegus might have escaped into the wild.
I’ve seen those suckers in South America. They’re pretty scary.
Oh, dear.
Tegus are capable of running at high speeds and can run bipedally for short distances. They often use this method in territorial defense, with the mouth open and front legs held wide to look more threatening.
Yes, that would look more threatening.
Oh. I thought this was going to be about some lizard alien conspiracy theories. You know, to take a break from COVID-19 conspiracies to one we could laugh at.
Turns out it’s another to add to the list that includes the murder hornets and feral pigs instead.
I don’t remember exactly what the rules are for this drinking game, but I’m pretty sure I need to pour myself a single-malt.
I’m on an enforced drought, David, so pour one for me.
You ask so little and give so much.
Of course I can do this one for you 
Do they eat nutria?
I saw a show on PBS a while back about nutria, and how people in the Mississippi Delta wetlands have dealt with them. This story also said that they, and not climate change, are actually the main reason the wetlands have shrunk, because they live on roots. My favorite story was the man who had friends who hunted them, and they sold the pelts (which was why they were brought here in the first place) and gave him the meat, which he would smoke along with vegetables and seasoning. Of course, he would always tell people what it was before they ate it.
I am OK with invasive species in general as long as they are freaky, big and exotic. Burmese python? Sure. Tegus? Sure.
Some tiny horned beetle that you can barely even see but devours crops? No, just no.
Make them open season and post recipes. They taste like chicken, problem solved.
There was an episode of Dave Attell’s Insomniac several years ago where he was down in New Orleans and accompanied a group out in the Mississippi hunting down nutria from a boat at night.
Catch and cook wild Florida Tegu.
Evidently it tastes like Pollo Tropical.
I’ve had stewed Green Iguana, which is quite delicious. (And yes, it does taste like chicken.)
Nice! 
Heh, I tried stewed Iguana, but the iguana was wild-caught and skinny. I remember gnawing the bits of meat off of the bones.Tasted like chicken, but hardly any meat.