Would I run into any restrictions giving my kid an obscene name? (US)

[mangeorge]

@t-bonham@scc.net

Yes, I believe they could. The hospital, after all, is just doing this as a convenience for the parents*; the official birth certificate is the paperwork filed with the local clerk of court or similar.

The hospital could simply put “baby boy” or “baby girl” on the paperwork, and give that to the parents. (See the recent threads on SMDB ‘Do parents have to give their baby a name before leaving the hospital’.) Then the parents would have to go to the clerk of court to enter the name they wanted. Thus the hospital is out of it; the parents can go fight with the clerk’s office about their ‘obscene’ name.

• Hospitals do this, and other things as a ‘convenience’, and make fairly substantial efforts to make their ‘birthing wing’ attractive and pleasant for parents. Because this is generally a very profitable part of the hospital. And parents can choose to go to any hospital (in their insurance plan) to give birth, unlike emergency medical problems. So hospitals work hard to make new parents happy.

That’s interesting. Makes sense, though, except that the parents could toss the paperwork and the kid would be a mystery baby.
I assume hospitals are required to report births.

[wonky]

@Chronos

Huh. I’m pretty sure I saw it spelled as “Nazi”, but Google only gives 36 hits for “Nazi Mohammed” (with quotes), and I’d expect more than that even if it were just misspelled in some news media. So I guess I sort of have to blame myself, here.

His name is Nazr, but it was pronounced and occasionally spelled Nazzi (NAH-zee) on TV. (Husband is UK fan.)

[TheOtherOne]

I met a guy not too long ago who changed his name to Joe Mighty Dolla. Don’t know what his original name was, but he actually showed me his ID to prove it, and I know several people who know him around here. What a kickass name!

[danceswithcats]

Worked with a fellow called Richard Head. A very nice fellow-I’m sure he had to kick some butt along the line. Retrieved a damaged ATM card that was jammed in the reader for a nice Asian gentleman named Kin G. Kong. Talk about supressing a snorf when the customer is right there.

Possibly the oddest name, again from the world of music:

BUSHWICK BILL AKA DR. WOLFGANG VON BUSHWICKIN THE BARBARIAN MOTHER-FUNKY STAY HIGH DOLLAR BILLSTIR…My last name was Bushwick Motherfking Bill, so I had to upgrade it to show some expansion and to show everybody who the biggest Geto Boy of all is. My new name is Dr. Wolfgang Von Bushwickin the Barbarian Mother Funky Stay High Dollar Billstir. I call myself Dr. because that is someone who must be precise when they execute their job. The Wolfgang is because on the cool, I’m into classical music and my favorite artist is Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Bushwickin has to do with me being a father now and producing my own next of kin. So now I’m reproductive both verbally and physically. The Barbarian is to show that I still have the mind of a lunatic and that nothing’s changed as far as me coming hard-core rough and rugged. Mother Funky Stay High is a manifestation of the aftermath of chronic-izm. Dollar Bill because I’m currently currency in the United States and abroad. Finally, “stir” is on the end because when I kick shit I always manage to stir something up, whether it’s the police, parents or psy.

[Telemark]

@Seven

My real name is in fact Seven. I like the name alot but sometimes I do get quite tired of hearing "is your sisters name eight?

You wouldn’t happen to have a sister named Nine by any chance, would you? Seriously, I went to college with a woman named ‘9’ (the numeral, not the word) and she had a brother named ‘7’. Actually it was their middle names, but she used it as her common name.

[gazpacho]

I went to school with a girl named Day Ann Knight

[Spongemom]

I had a teacher that went to school with a Sunshine Buttercup.

I haven’t seen an answer yet…sorry if I missed it…what’s a “grapist”?

[roger_thornhill]

Someone who posts in colour without any apparent raisin, and looks blanc when called for it.

I’m going to send this without preview, so may be pipped by another poster. I hope it’s not all in vine best Dick van Dyke accent.

[Snooooopy]

@Spongemom

I had a teacher that went to school with a Sunshine Buttercup.

I haven’t seen an answer yet…sorry if I missed it…what’s a “grapist”?

A long-departed poster whose mission was to quote other people’s posts in purple and add the tagline “This post has been graped by the Grapist!” A real one-trick pony.

To learn more about the legend of the Grapist:

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=280924&highlight=graped

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5368339&postcount=39

Note that the second link goes not to the original Grapist, but to a pretender who registered using a very similar name (and, actually, screwed up the coding). But that’s the best I could find. The intent was the same.

[Snooooopy]

Actually, neither link goes to the original Grapist. Maybe all of that poster’s threads have been lost to the sands of time.

[The_Llama]

@Spongemom

I had a teacher that went to school with a Sunshine Buttercup.

I haven’t seen an answer yet…sorry if I missed it…what’s a “grapist”?

This post has been UN-Graped by… ah forget it.
Man, I HATE the N-word more than anyone I know, but the name in the op had me laughing hysterically.

[dorfl]

@Walloon

Langmaker: “France, Germany and Scandinavia all have lists of approved first names; a baby must be given an approved name, or the child will not be legally recognized.”

This is true in spirit but wrong in the detail. My German cousin picked a nordic name for her little baby girl. It was not in the famous reference book, so the person at the registrar[1] asked them to show that this is indeed a real name. They did so by pulling some older scandinavian history books. Voila - name approved.

So while the reference book is a guide, you can give your kid a name that is not in there as long as you have some prove that it is a traditional name. So “Scheisskopf”[2] would not work.

Dorfl, whose real name very traditional and boring
[1] Or whatever the local authority would be called in English - German “Standesamt”
[2] Shithead

[Gfactor]

Well, this may not be directly on point, but it shows the variety of surnames out there.

There will be several other training cruises before the Chafee can expect go on its first western Pacific deployment next fall.

“It was an experience, starting from nothing and to be the first crew on a brand-new ship,” said Petty Officer Zorahnadawn Tampon, a 1996 Hilo High School graduate who had never been off the Big Island until joining the Navy five years ago.

Because Tampon is one of the original crewmembers on the Chafee, she is now a “plankowner.” Plankowners receive an officer’s greeting when coming back aboard the ship, even after they leave the ship or retire from the Navy.

However, what even tops that for shipmates Kaleopa and Tampon, both single mothers, is being home for Christmas.

Both have children waiting for them.

For Tampon, it’s 2-year-old son Zyrus Johnry in Papaikou on the Big Island. For Kaleopa, it’s 6-year-old daughter Alexis.

http://starbulletin.com/2003/11/16/news/story8.html

[Spongemom]

@roger thornhill

Someone who posts in colour without any apparent raisin, and looks blanc when called for it.

I’m going to send this without preview, so may be pipped by another poster. I hope it’s not all in vine best Dick van Dyke accent.

I’m sorry I missed that in the rules. I post on a ton of message boards, and my posts are always purple. It’s kinda my thing. A signature of sorts. If you saw my website, it might make more sense.

[Marley23]

@Snooooopy

You haven’t Godwinized the thread either, actually.

Technically, if you’re going to invoke Godwin’s Law, you have to compare someone or something to Hitler. You haven’t made any such comparison. You just mentioned his name.

So, Mighty_Girl has misapplied an Internet rule. Just like Hitler.

[Regallag_The_Axe]

I’m just suprised that no one mentioned “Blfema” (Black female) or “Nosmoking.”

[jbarro]

@Dr_Paprika

So much for naming my first kid Enis. I kind of like “Third” (1/3).

I actually taught a kid named Innis, pronounced to rhyme with “penis”.

[Sample_the_Dog]

@hlanelee

Has a child ever grown up and brutally murdered its parent(s) for the name they gave him? Is it really that difficult to believe that this could happen? It’s a cruel world and DSS might not be the worst thing to worry about. I started seeing this girl a few weeks ago and she told me that at her divorce proceeds she asked the judge to please not make her return to her maiden name (Dix ). I agreed with her. I said that that was an unfortunate name to go through school for 16 years with.

hlanelee, your post brings to mind 2 kids I grew up with.

One brutally murdered his parents.

The other was a girl of the last name Dix. Here in Eden Alley, it’s not infrequent for parents to give their first-born the mother’s maiden name as a middle. Her parents followed this tradition, and unfortunately for her, her mama’s daddy’s last name was Love.

My father swears he once worked with a man whose parents refused to break the chain as well – guy by the name of Greasy Sweat.

As for the OP, no idea.

PS: A friend of mine also taught a Shithead at a local elementary school.

[Khampelf]

@Telemark

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seven
My real name is in fact Seven. I like the name alot but sometimes I do get quite tired of hearing "is your sisters name eight?

You wouldn’t happen to have a sister named Nine by any chance, would you? Seriously, I went to college with a woman named ‘9’ (the numeral, not the word) and she had a brother named ‘7’. Actually it was their middle names, but she used it as her common name.

Well, Seven hasn’t come back, but I can just imagine that exchange:

“Is your sister named Eight?”

“No, Nine.”

“???”

“We’re an Odd family.”

[Snooooopy]

@Marley23

So, Mighty_Girl has misapplied an Internet rule. Just like Hitler.

At first, I was going to point out that this isn’t possible, given that Hitler’s death predated the Internet by decades.

However, it occurred to me that Godwin’s Law doesn’t say anything about whether or not the comparison to Hitler makes the least bit of sense.

So, I concede. Congratulations!