“No on one and yes on two.” [/Buckaroo Banzai]
Been said already, but they’ve got interstellar tech and they can perform apparent ‘miracles’. I don’t think they’d actually need us; if they wanted to enslave us, they could probably just synthesise some kind of drug, either to gain control of our minds, or just something like Soma - to use as currency to bribe us into submission and docility.
Perhaps the aliens could use a small force to set up the circumstances for this “religious war”.
A group disguised as Muslims could hijack aircraft and crash them into American buildings. See, no alien bodies to find, unlike Roswell.
Then sometime later (George W probably would hope late in his second term) the whole JC, Bush’s destiny to save the planet - King of earth scenario, could begin.
You don’t work for the White House do you?
Ok, let’s see if I’ve got the parameters correct:
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Aliens have super-advanced technology.
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Want to enslave humanity.
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Can’t achieve #2 by direct means: war would destroy whatever they want, and they don’t have the sheer numbers to police the planet.
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They therefore have to work by manipulating the systems we humans already have in place. I presume from the whole fake-Jesus scam that they can’t alter human behavior directly.
The aliens could go a long way simply by gaining control of the world’s economy. Start with a few front corporations that introduce profitable new technology, and then build this up into a vast empire of subsidiaries and holding companies. Use alien surveilence technology far beyond human means for industrial espionage, blackmail and evading law-enforcement. Spend a few decades steering people they own into important positions.
I’m reminded of the SF-Conspiracy movie They Live, where one of the aliens’ human stooges says (paraphrased): “They’ve been here for decades. They run everything. They OWN everything. They ARE the system.”
NARF!
Anyhoo, if at noon the President tries to form policy based on his personal meetings with Jesus, the cabinet will invoke the 25th at 12:01. If not, the Joint Chiefs will smile and nod and find reasons to avoid carrying out the nuttier-seeming orders. The aliens will have to make an impression on more than just the Prez. It’s not like he hogs the nuke-launching-device like your Dad with the TV remote.
I never understood the value of conquering a planet to mine it, anyway. If you’ve got casual space travel, you can mine asteroids with a fraction of the hassle. Aliens who need water can scoop it up by the megaton from Saturn’s rings, or just grab comets. Landing on Earth and then trying to lift water off the surface against the planet’s gravity represents a huge waste of energy.