Yeah, anyone needing this service in the Austin area, PM me; I’m retired and I both read and knit, so no troubles with sitting and waiting. And I wake up around 5 every morning so no problem with early appointments (unless my cats both die, in which case I might get to sleep in some day…but they’re young cats).
I have no family nearby. I do have a couple of friends who have taken me to a local hospital for a colonoscopy and minor surgical procedure. In both cases, the hospital insisted we be there very early in the morning, so I could don the gown and shower cap and then sit for hours in a hospital bed, while the ladies working the reception area scolded the drivers to not leave the room unless they sign in and out. Half-hour procedures took 8 hours.
I have sat in the reception area myself, subject to the haranguing and I’d rather not put myself or my friends through this again if I can help it.
Hospital policy strictly forbids taking a taxi or even senior transport (which I qualify for). The lawyers have it all buttoned down. A family member or representative must be in attendance at all times during the procedure. We have lawsuit-driven medicine. Being hesitant to ask a friend to spend a whole day in a waiting room has caused me to delay indefinitely several procedures I should have taken care of.
At my last appointment with my internist (gatekeeper of all things health related in my PPO) I asked him to refer me to a different hospital next time and he agreed. I’ll still have to scare up a ride and hope for a more efficiently run operation.
I’d just press the wife into service yet again. But I’m curious. Is this something new, this no procedure without someone present? I don’t recall ever hearing of this in the US back when I lived there. And they would go ahead and do it anyway if you checked in as an inpatient and stayed overnight, wouldn’t they?
I don’t know how long ago you lived here, but routine outpatient surgery and tests requiring sedation, like colonoscopy, have been growing in popularity over the years. If you were under 50 and never damaged yourself much, you probably just didn’t run into it.
There’s also a push from insurance companies to do things outpatient more and more, because it’s cheaper. Used to be a tonsilectomy would get you three days in the hospital for observation and teaching and all the ice cream you could eat. Today, it’s more likely to be outpatient, sent home after an hour or two in recovery. Outpatient Surgery | Johns Hopkins Medicine
Grumpy home nurse doesn’t like this. It means, most often, they’re sending people home when they’re still at risk from the effects of the anesthesia, and the patient often has no idea what was done or why or what she should do now.
So if you wanted to be admitted to the hospital overnight, that wouldn’t be an option? I suppose it’s the insurance companies, like you said.
My recent colonoscopy here was outpatient, but no one was required to be with me, although it was recommended. And my doctor gave me the option of checking into the hospital overnight since some patients only had inpatient insurance. Mine covered it okay though.
how about paying somebody?
I don’t live in the US, but it’s common in hospitals here to pay a private nurse to help out in the hospital. Lots of people don’t like being left alone in the hospital and don’t want to trouble their family, so they pay a private nurse to “be a member of the family” for a day or two after, say, having an operation.
The private nurse just sits alongside your bed (usually at night), and helps you. Simple things like hand you the wetwipes when you want, help you go to the toilet—(help you get out of the bed and support you leaning on their shoulder while you walk painfully to the bathroom, or bring you a bedpan if necesssary, etc. When the staff brings food to your bed, the private nurse will spoon-feed you at your own pace if you are too weak to feed yourself, or can’t move your arms independently.
Sure-- the regular hospital staff will do all this for you for free…but you may have to wait 5 or 10 minutes till they finish taking care of somebody else, and they tend to be efficient but impersonal. Paying for private care makes you feel better, and usually only necessary for one or two days, so it’s not too expensive.
These people will also be glad to let you pay them for 5 hours of their time if you need an escort.
If you want to pay a few thousand out of pocket, maybe. Insurance definitely will not pay for it. But lots of these procedures aren’t even done in hospitals anymore, but stand alone “Ambulatory Surgery” centers. So no, you can’t be admitted, because there’s nowhere to admit you. At 5:00, the staff locks up and goes home.
I don’t remember those at all.
I came to say what Senegoid said. This is a big issue that social services and charities work on. Contact your local church. Or “a” local church. They can facilitate arrangements. Some housewife or senior citizen out there is willing to sit with you.
The day laborer idea is pretty good too.
Co-workers are kinder than you realize. Just ask. If they can’t do it they may know an out of work relative.
See?
I was lucky to have my mom when I went under for wisdom teeth extraction, but she totally left and ran errands in between. 
She does the same thing for reluctant neighbors and friends. It’s okay to ask people for help. People LIKE helping.
For example, SiamSam, colonoscopies are now done at colonoscopy centers, outpatient places that only do colonscopies. Hospitals aren’t needed.
I’d be perfectly happy to do it for somebody who needed me to - coworker, neighbor (and I totally do not know my neighbors at all), friend of a friend - I think a lot of the people who think nobody would do it for them are underestimating people.
Could you actually manage to set up and use a ‘colonoscopy/endoscope for upper GI’ mobile van unit? Though isn’t part of the person to take you home to theoretically sit with you for a couple hours afterwards to make sure something untoward doesn’t happen?
I would definitely use a mobile GI van, plenty of space in the upper parking area on the farm for one 
One problem is that for a lot of these procedures, they use sedatives such as Versed or Propofol that can temporarily prevent you from forming short-term memories. (You may be in pain during the procedure but at least you won’t remember it 
The effect persists for a while after you wake up and things can feel weirdly dreamlike for a while. I’ve done the colonoscopy thing a few times now and it’s pretty weird to have only a faint memory of things that you know happened. (My gastroenterologist has a bad habit of telling you the results of the exam just after you woke up, which means that you sometimes have to call the office the next day and find out what the results were.)
Um, long story short, they don’t want people with impaired memories going out and playing in traffic.
When I lived on my own, I had a couple of close friends I could have asked to help me with something like this. Now that I live with my father, I would expect him to do it since helping each other out is part of the bargain. In fact I have to take him to his cataract surgeries this spring.
I’m with Lsura on this one. If you were in my area, and I didn’t have some sort of “I can’t get out of this” thing going on, I’d help you out. Thankfully, I’ve got an understanding manager, and I don’t take advantage of the system.
I can count about a dozen people living within 30 miles that I feel comfortable asking for any kind of help. I can think of another dozen that I could call in an emergency. “I know, it’s 3AM, but I really really need help.”
This. I have had to have outpatient surgery twice and both times the doctors told my friend or sister how the procedure went and what needed to happen next. The first time, I think my friend assumed the doctor had actually explained any of it to me, and I didn’t take care of myself properly. Not my friend’s fault, she was there to be my companion, not my nurse. The second time was a few weeks ago and I’m still finding out stuff the doctor said. My sister explained some things but I was on heavy pain killers for several days and remember very little. Luckily she called a lot to see how things were going.
I had this problem years ago. It’s a horrifically lonely feeling, and asking a mere acquaintance was more than I could face. At the time I called a local concierge service, and they had a courier they used who was more than willing for a small hourly fee. Today, I would put a note out on Facebook and I’m sure some friend or neighbor would find the time.
In NOVA we have a registry for in-home care providers. http://www.virginianavigator.org/vn/ListingReport.aspx?directoryEntryId=120956 you may have to call a few before finding one who drives, but it’s not that difficult, and these folks generally work on loose schedules so are available for occasional work.
Internet search by “Elder Care” and your city or zip code to find a multitude of resources.
I have no idea if anyone is doing it, but it’s a fantastic idea for underserved rural areas. I can’t think of a technical reason why you couldn’t. The GI room I worked in was about the size of my pop-up camper’s interior. They’ve got portable monitors and oxygen systems and IV poles. You’d probably have to go back to a “home base” to sterilize the scopes each night; I think they’re gas sterilized, not just autoclaved. You would want to work out a “recovery room,” though - generally nurses observe a patient about an hour after a colonoscopy, and you wouldn’t want to tie up your Procedure Trailer waiting for people to wake up and start farting.
Just as a guess, I’d bet that “home colonoscopy” wouldn’t have a higher risk than home birth. But there is some risk that Bad Things can happen. In both situations, I wouldn’t really want to be more than a 20 minute ambulance ride from a hospital, just in case.
[QUOTE=Finagle;17063794 (My gastroenterologist has a bad habit of telling you the results of the exam just after you woke up, which means that you sometimes have to call the office the next day and find out what the results were.)
[/QUOTE]
For one of my colonoscopies, an acquaintance I did not know all that well, but was available that day, offered to take me, and got to not only sit there all day (not allowed to leave the premises under threat of something unspeakable) but was called to speak to the gastroenterologist after my exam. Lucky woman got to hear all the grisly bits about my colon!
I remember being a bit groggy, slowly putting my street clothes back on when a nurse brought her back to the surgical bay. She said “I know all about your colon now, and I even have color photos for you!”.
I don’t remember ever speaking to the doctor afterwards. He sent his report to my primary physician, who gave me the details about a month later. Ah, the beauty of US industrial medicine!
Carlotta I just came in to say, “bless your generous heart for doing that.”
FYI, if you guys need someone and can’t find a friend/family member/random, Google “medical transportation”. They’ll pick you up, drop you off and wait if necessary. Also, if you’re in Central Florida, I’ll come pick you up.
My wife had a bunch of cervical epidurals last year and I was able to take her to three of four. Her mother was there for the other. I’m not sure how many of my friends would be up for it at 7 am though.