Would you be able to find somebody to go to surgery at 7am with you?

Today I took a nice elderly gentleman to the hospital to get outpatient surgery. They couldn’t tell him the surgery time until the night before and it could’ve been anywhere in between 7 am and 11am. They would not perform the surgery unless there was a person with him and the person would have to be there a minimum of 5 hours.

I was connected with him through a Facebook plea of a mutual friend of ours (who had to work).

There’s a few people in my life that I could ask to give up a day of work starting before 7am, but I would hate to have to ask, it seems like a BIG favor.

The nurse seemed surprised that I had just met him that morning, but it’s gotta be kind of hard for a lot of people she sees every day to come up with a companion.

How do people deal with this?

Most people have family or close friends. If you don’t, then your SOL.

Well, or even a neighbor. I’ve had maybe 3 conversations with the lady next door in the past 5 years, and apart from the first they weren’t pleasant. Nevertheless, if she were to ask I’d be her huckleberry for an adventure such as described. I can’t be that much more awesome than your average neighbor.

I had to have my wisdom tooth removed a few years back. The surgeon wanted to do all 4 of them and started making arrangements with the nurse. He’s telling me about how the surgery’s going to go and what I’ll need to have beforehand. One of those things is a person, since with four teeth extractions, I’d have to be put under and thus I’d be too out of it to drive. The person would then have to sit with me for two hours to make sure I’m okay.

I told him that I didn’t have anyone who can do this. At the time, all of my relatives were 400+ miles away. No friends. Just workplace acquaintances.

Both the doctor and the nurse stood there looking dumbfounded. The nurse looked like she was thinking, “This poor child!” For a good five minutes, they gently prodded into my personal business, trying to get me to cough up a name of someone nearby who I halfway trust. When tears started springing to my eyes they stopped.

So the surgeon told me that since he couldn’t use anesthesia on me, he could only remove two teeth. Which was 100% fine with me.

Later, my therapist told me that she would have picked me up since she lives literally around the corner. She was so sweet for offering to do this, but I just don’t think it would have been right to impose on her.

Now that my sister lives a couple of hours away, I feel like I do have someone who’d help me out. But I would need to have significant lead time so she could make arrangements to drive down.

Besides my family, I have at least 3 close friends who would help me in a situation like this. And I’d do the same for them.

I have plenty of friends and family in the area. I would be able to find a number of people who would take me to surgery at whatever time was schedule, and at least a couple who would likely be able to help in an emergency. I feel very fortunate.

Besides my SO I have two or three other friends who might oblige, if they were able. But my SO is the only one I would expect to take time off from work for me. The last time was my colonoscopy, which was 8 years ago.

Gee, wasn’t I lucky :dubious: that I had my prostate biopsy done with only a local, so I was able to just toddle off home by myself.

I’d call on a coworker: I’ve driven her to a colonoscopy in the past, and to the emergency room, where we stayed all night.

My mother is a couple of hours away as are two of my brothers. But my father’s not in great health, so I couldn’t ask my mother to come down. My brothers would, if their schedules allowed, but I feel like it would need to be fairly serious before I asked.

I do have an aunt, uncle and cousin in town - but we’re not close, and it would feel like a bigger imposition with them than with my siblings.

I am in that situation right now. I have to have a minor procedure done on Wednesday and I don’t really know anyone to even ask to accompany me. I have family but they are thousands of miles away except for my daughters who are too young and in school. I have coworkers that are basically friends but I live 30 miles away from work and they have to, you know, work. I have some casual friends close by but they have jobs too and I am not going to ask them to take off work to drive me to the doctor half an hour in another direction, wait and then drive back. I hate asking favors from anyone especially if it costs them something.

The only real options I have are to cancel it or pay one of my non-working neighbors (who I am friendly but not personal with) to take me. I might just go to Home Depot and pay a day laborer $100 to come with me just to make the staff happy. “Meet my lifelong best friend, Juan Jesus…something”. I kid but not really. I feel like I just have to beat the system on this one because it is a real problem for a significant number of people.

The last time I had this happen, I didn’t take anyone and I showed up anyway. The staff balked but I talked them into doing the procedure without any anesthesia. They did it reluctantly but said I was the first. I may try that again.

Plenty of family. My parents are retired, so the times I’ve had to go under it’s been her. I also have sisters, an aunt, and a couple of cousins close enough to help out. Things like this get interchanged among us.

If I didn’t have family close by I do have friends at church I know I could call on, as I’d do the same for them.

Why isn’t this thread in the Pit where it belongs? It’s a shit-fucking PITA and nothing less, what the above posters are saying. I had similar problems within recent years.

Had upper-GI endoscopy a few years ago. Had to ask a neighbor that I hardly know to take me. At least, that time, they didn’t require the neighbor to sit on her ass in the waiting room the whole time.

Had a colonoscopy scheduled about a year ago. I kinda-sorta tentatively had a neighbor lined up for that, but it ended up not happening for various reasons.

Finally had that colonoscopy several months ago. My brother drove up from three hours away just to drive me the 2 miles to the hospital for that one. And they require the driver to stay there the whole time. (He couldn’t have come at the earlier date because he lived in Vancouver at the time. I am in California.)

So I can’t drive myself home? Fine. Can I just call a taxi? Nope. How about taking a bus? Forget it. How about Dial-A-Ride? Nope. How about one of those medical transportation shuttle buses I see driving around town all the time? Nope. So what the fuck are those shuttle buses for then?

Next time, they can damn well bring a portable equipment set to my own living room and do their fucking procedures on my own turf.

What, me pissed? :mad:

I live several thousands of miles away from all my family, and my boyfriend doesn’t drive, so it’d be tough but I think I could find someone. I’d probably have to schedule it for a day that they had off or something though. I don’t know anyone nearly well enough to ask them to take a day off from work, or maybe I just don’t like imposing on my friends that much.

I don’t think you’re in the Atlanta area, but if you are, PM me. Yes, I’m basically a complete stranger, but I’ve seen your name around the board for years.

Thanks for the generous offer :). I am sure you mean it but that it is a little too far for me to ask anyone to drive for an appointment. I live in the Boston suburbs.

My wife had cataract surgery twice this fall as an out patient. For the second operation, I was teaching class so I dropped her off and was going to return to pick her up about two hours later. That was well before they’d let her go.

At first they balked about this arrangement, then she said the social worker questioned her closely about whether she was scared to go home with me since “obviously” if I couldn’t sit in the waiting room the whole time, I must have been some kind of evil person I guess.

I have a couple people who would do that for me. But I would avoid asking if at all possible. Last time I was in the hospital, they kinda wanted someone with me at discharge, but I was nearly two days post-op and within my faculties, so I guess they didn’t have any reason not to let me go. My discharge nurse was insistent that I call her when I got home (I took a cab) and when I forgot and didn’t call for a couple hours (so glad to be home, my pets happy to see me, we all snuggled up and took a nap), she called me to make sure I got home and was OK.

I am lucky to have a couple people I could easily call on (husband and college-age child living at home), but I’m surprised that this issue does not come up more often than it apparently does. One example would be a young college graduate who has moved to a new town, far from relatives, to start a new job. In the first few weeks, or even months, is it really likely that that young person would feel comfortable asking neighbors or co-workers to take several hours out of their day to deal with this?

I’m also surprised at the requirement that the other person has to stay with the patient the entire time. I’ve had procedures that involved anesthesia where someone was required to come pick me up and take me home. But I got to the hospital on my own steam, and was by myself for the procedure. My ride came to pick me up when it was time for me to head home.

There are services that you can hire to be your wait around person, and to drive you home and sit with you the requisite time. I’ve never had to hire someone but I’ve come close.

I’ve had several out patient and one in hospital surgeries. After the first male friend ‘baby sat’ me, word got around that I’m hysterically funny to watch recovering from anesthesia. Sort of like those videos of cats coming out of anesthesia, only taller and older. When I need help, even people I barely know are willing to help.

Nope. Been in Singapore 4 months, and apart from my husband there is nobody in the same continent, never mind locally. (And actually, he ISN"T on the same continent right now. Huh. Better keep away from sharp objects and high places today).

A similar thing came up with my daughter’s school registration - they wanted an emergency contact other than myself or my husband. Uh, yeah - no. It’s us or social services I’m afraid. I’m not worried about it most of the time - I have a bunch of acquaintances and maybe one or two of them will become something more eventually. However, I am going to stop thinking about this right now.

I guess I kind of unfortunately know way too many unemployed or retired folks. There are oodles who could do this for me on a moment’s notice.

I have several gainfully employed friends who would help me out as well. My best friend would do it at a moment’s notice, and the others could help out with a little heads-up.

I guess it’s one of the perks of being a total loser and never having left your hometown. Everyone I know is right here.

That is really sweet of you to help out, carlotta. Hope when all of my relatives and friends die, there’s someone nice around like you to help me :slight_smile: