True. However, we Americans do frequently whip off our glasses and fix our conversation partner with an unblinking stare whenever we’re about to say something important.
We are also capable of driving while gazing fixedly at the passenger in our righthand seat, navigating by psychic sonar projected from our left ear.
I don’t really find it offensive, just incorrect. I don’t have anything against northerners, but I don’t want to be labeled as one any more than as a Canadian or anything else that I am not.
But among my entourage, farewells are common. I usually say, “Later,” when speaking informally. (I don’t do that only on the phone though.) The only time I wouldn’t give a farewell or expect to receive one is if I’m about to meet that person face-to-face.
And no one ever watchs tv when they’re at home.
I have to agree with some of you. It just really irks me when common courtesy is totally ignored. I have a friend who ends all conversations on the phone with a muffled ok and then click. I’ve even jokingly complained to him that I have never used that as an ending and could he please, at least with me, say goodbye so I could have some sense of completion. He said…ok. Arghh!! He still does it.
I always end phone conversations with a closing in social situations. At work I might not, but that’s usually only if I’ve been having a series of phone calls with the person across the office all day, as often happened with my last job.
I did have a Brit friend who said that when asked “how are you?” over the phone, she always said “_______, thanks.” She told me that she would add the “thanks” even when talking to friends. To my ear as an American, unless it’s to someone you haven’t spoken to in awhile or in a formal situation, the “thanks” just sounds way too polite for casual conversation.
Can any Brits chime in on this?
I wanted to add that occasionally I do get people hanging up pissed at me (well, not at me personally maybe, but if I tell you that we are sold out that means we are sold out, I have no way to accomodate you, sorry) so it doesn’t seem entirely unreasonable for me to assume a sudden hang up at work means the hangee didn’t like what I had to say. And no, I was not rude, but I don’t have magic rooms to yank out of my ass for you because you didn’t plan your trip ahead of time either.
An Gadai (sorry, I don’t know how to do the accent), that’s just weird. Especially if you have a flip phone. “Bye!” flip phone shut pretend you’ve been talking to the Enterprise
I had dinner with a good friend this evening and when we parted we did not say anything resembling “good bye”. As we were departing we talked about how the last time we had lunch it was -25F, and a little about things like busy and stuff and life. As we separated I said something about getting together again - preferably before it got back down to 25 below - and she agreed and off we drove in our separate directions.
For me, telephone conversations go the same way. “Sorry, sis, I love ya, but I gotta sleep. Talk to you soon, ok?”
“Ok, I love you.”
“I love you to. G’night.”
At work: “Deb, did you talk to A about B? Cos C just called about D.”
“Yep, just now, and E trumps F so we’re all good.”
“Ok, thanks. Next time you get to talk to G about H! Laters!”
And I’m almost positive that my last conversation with someone on a customer service line ended with me saying, “Ok, great, thanks - have a great night and don’t have too much fun”, but that has more to do with the side conversations we had while he was on hold trying to get the right answer for me.
Soooo…yeah. The actual word “bye” isn’t important, but in any human interaction there is some sort of language that concludes it. I haven’t yet seen an action on screen (small or large) that duplicates anything resembling an end - it’s always just a click. Irritating.
The only time I might not say bye is when the phone call isn’t for me.
Caller: Is Tom here.
Me: No wrong number.
Caller: Oh, sorry.
Then I hang up.
Well…ya see Lakai, even in that situation I would feel compelled to say, at the very least, bye. Even if I didn’t know the person. Maybe being raised in the 50’s did something to me.
By the way, bye
It’s not that. “Gmmbye” or “goombye” or “mmmbye” is a very common but lazy way of saying “goodbye” at least in this part of Yankland. They’re not caught by surprise; they’re just not enunciating it as a Brit might.
It would no more be a sign of surprise than hearing a Brit say “ullo.” It’s not “uhhhh… lo,” it’s a completely missing consonant sound.
I always wondered why they do that in movies. IMO not saying goodbye (or some variation of it) is rude and on those extremely rare occasions when I didn’t say it, that was exactly my goal.
One of my mother’s friends can take 15’ (clocked) from the first “goodbye” until she finally hangs up, but it’s a personal trait. Thank Ogette, the rest of my acquaintances don’t draw “oh, hi, I didn’t know you were visiting! Is your mother in? Oh, ok, can you please tell her I called?” into a half an hour conversation.
Depending on the formality of the conversation, I always end my calls with “smooches,” “HAIL SATAN!” or a wet slurping sound.
Depends. Is Yank an abbreviation of ‘yankee’ or the polite form of ‘septic’? if the latter, fighting words rude.
I usually end with “Talk with you later”, seldom if ever “Goodbye”. I just feel uncomfortable saying goodbye. There are a couple of people I talk to that just hang up, sometimes while I’m still talking but for the most part there is a closing salutation of some sort somewhere.
Oh, and isn’t Hugh Laurie british anyway? I thought his “sleeper” mission was to teach us yanks how to be rude right proper, not half-ass it. Otherwise we may all fall victom to the likes of Simon Cowel and the Weakest Link lady (who always said goodbye).
That’s the explanation I came up with. It’s a strange and recent habit. By the way Alt Gr + vowel = vowel with accent. áéóíú.
Before ‘bye’, or ‘talk to you later’, some type of acknowledgment about the next step is traditional, and makes the transition into ‘bye’ easier.
Example, where-in person 2 initiated the phone call:
person 1: "…yes, I am going to the beach tomorrow. So I have to run to the store now for a few things.’’
person 2: “Ok, when you get back from the beach, give me a call and we will go over those numbers again.”
person 1: “Ok, I should be back on Tuesday”.
person 2: “Well, I will take to you then”
person1: “Sounds good”
person 2: “Good…talk to you then” >deliberate quick pause from person 2<
person1: >uses pause to squeeze in< ‘‘okay’’
person2: ‘‘bye’’
person 1: ‘‘bye’’
My father almost never says bye. Only known a few other people who have this social ettiquette problem, most of whom are a bit rude in normal discourse.
A few jobs back, one of the supervisors, who was a Complete Fucking Asshole™, had severe phone ettiquette problems. Jump right into conversation, hang up the minute his business was done, regardless of whether or not you were still speaking. After they “reorganized” and and he “voluntarily left for other opportunities”, it was one of the things most often mentioned as a reason why they were glad to be rid of him. Doing that to employees is bad enough, doing it to customers was inexcusable, and despite near constant discussion, his behavior never changed.
I absolutely hate it when people hang up the phone without some sort of statement that signifies the end of the conversation. Maybe its “Bye”, or “Goodbye”… maybe its “Talk to you later” or even “Laters”. But to just hang up without some sort of closer? Grrrrrr.
Note - to people who mentioned work calls - if you get them so regularly that the phone is almost a substitute walkie-talkie, then I can understand why the pleasantries don’t play into it. But for the rest of you… [insert accusing finger-pointing here]
Actually, let me revise that. I have definitely hung up on people without saying goodbye, but if I do that, it is a very definite indication that I am supremely pissed of at the person with whom I am speaking.
There’s a wrinkle here, too: The conversation should be ended with a traditional closer, but that closer has to be acknowledged. My dear departed grandmother used to have this trick — you’d be talking to her, and then all of a sudden she’d say “okay, bye” and hang up on you. In some ways, this is even worse than ending the call without saying goodbye, because in that case at least there’s an argument to be made for absent-mindedness. But if you say goodbye without preamble and then hang up without waiting for a response, you are consciously cutting the other person off.