One might be compelled to ask again: did you talk to your neighbor? Are these cats neutered and vaccinated? That makes a big difference in how much sympathy the OP deserves for his concern over these cats. It also very much affects how “feral” they are.
The supersoaker idea is a good one. That could deter the cats from your property without harming them.
Yes, but the kajillion reasons you posted also apply to the snakes, turtles, foxes or whatever the heck else decides to roll up on your lawn. You’re singling the cats out for no particular reason, so fuck you first. Your choosing to get more upset about the cats than the mice, just because one of them definitely had domestic ancestors and the other only maybe had domestic ancestors, doesn’t give you any sort of moral high ground here.
What did your neighbors say? I hope they said fuck you too.
Something’s wrong with your reading comprehension skills.
They’re feeding the cats. They wouldn’t be here otherwise. Their quasi-domesticity certainly is relevant here. They’re not considered wildlife. If you can’t understand that, I can’t help you.
Snakes aren’t killing rodents and leaving them on my porch. Foxes aren’t jumping out of my bushes and scaring my wife. Turtles aren’t digging under my house.
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I used to live in a nice neighborhood. Been living there for years in peace.
Then these folks moved in next door with a germ ridden little girl. She immediately became a pest. She was nearly feral IMO. I can’t even imagine why the parents even fed her. Its like they actually cared for her or something. I just don’t get it. Crazy kid people.
I dont like kids, they bother me. The little girl was always bugging me with inane questions through the fence while I was in the backyard trying to get work done. I told her and her parents several times I didnt like it and it needed to stop. She’s a little girl, we don’t have total control over her ya know. Yeah, like thats my problem !
Finally, after just a few weeks I just couldnt take it anymore. So, here she comes again. I go up to my side of the fence. Hi Sally, how are you doing? You know what happens to little girls that talk to strangers through a fence? It angers the strangers. Then, eventually, the stranger gets so angry he sneaks into your house and kills both your parents. And when they are dead, they arent sleeping or watching over you from the clouds in heaven. They are rotting in the ground with the worms eating them just like they are eating your grandparents who died last years. Then, because your parents are dead, the police come and kick you out of the house, so you have to go live in the woods. During the day you have keep running or the bears will catch you and eat you. During the night, you have to stay awake and keep swatting the bats away or they will bite your neck and suck your blood out. So, Sally, it might be best if you never talked to me again.
Tough talk I know, but she was a nuisance and something had to be done. If nobody had been looking I woulda risked popping her with a pellet gun. But I decided to keep it perfectly legal and just have a nice talk. Its my property you know and I have an unlimited right to enjoy it and protect my rights.
Fascinating. You’re missing a vital link, however. The one that equates feral cats with human beings. I’m sure it was just an oversight on your part.
Both are nuisances.
Both were/are/will be dealt with totally legally.
In both cases property owners were/are/will be exercising their rights.
In both cases the “owners” of said nuisances would be righfully and probably be about equally pissed about the methodology used by the property owners.
The girl was not on your property. The girl is not the property of the parents. The cats are not the property of Thespos’ neighbors. The girl has numerous legal rights not given to the cats.
How about spraying the posts of your fence with tiger urine (available from zoos, amazon.com and, well, tigers). Doesn’t smell bad once applied. Will tend to keep the cats away, or at least nervous. 
I never said she was.
So we agree the parents cant control their “girl” anymore than the neighbors can control “their” cats.
The girl has a legal right to not be told a scary story?
Not to step into the ‘fuck-you’ fest, which has been stopped by the resident mod anyway (Killjoy!), but you seem to have missed, or to be ignoring, the fact is that THespos was very clear in his OP as to why he dislikes these particular cats, and despite your assertion, it isn’t that he’s some sicko cat-hater. He said, The cats are wild. They emerge from our bushes and startle my wife when we come home at night. They leave gifts of dead moles and mice on the back patio. They stalk the wildlife in our back yard. He also said, There’s really nothing they’re going to be able to do, short of getting rid of the cats, to satisfy me.
I assume when the snakes, turtles, and foxes create the same nuisance, attributable to the same apparent cause (neighbor feeding them), he’ll have the same problem and the same attitude regarding it.
And if his neighbors say “fuck you” too, I personally hope the next step is cat traps and wholesale removal to the pound.
Personally, I think people who let cats roam free are irresponsible pet owners who apparently don’t really give a shit if their pet lives or dies. I would never personally kill a cat or any animal with an endoskeleton (too squeamish), but I’d call the pound in a heartbeat for feral cats, and I wouldn’t talk to the neighbors about it first, either.
THespos, what did the neighbors say? Some of us are still interested in how you’re handling this, and not so interested in casting you as the embodiment of cat-killing evil.
Except that (2) and (3) above are probably not true with regard to a child, and (4), the idea that any person would be “equally pissed” in the two scenarios, is just bizarre.
She has a legal right not to be threatened.
But if those animals were becoming a nuisance, would you act? Most wild animals, as has been noted, prefer not to interact with people. And in fact, it is considered dangerous/bad idea to feed wild animals as a general rule, lest they get accustomed to people. If the cats are pets, then they should be taken care of as pets and be controlled. If they are wild animals, then they should be treated as wild animals–you don’t pet or lay out food for the neighborhood fox or raccoon (unless you’re Timothy Treadwell). You can’t really have it both ways.
Telling a scary story is illegal? And even if it is, I am sure I could conjure up something else that would be perfectly legal that would still get the parents royally pissed yet be totally legal.
You can’t **comprehend **that you killing cats that someone cares about **might ** piss them off? Really? Seriously?
Oh yeah, I am sure I’d get thrown in the slammer for that one.
Maybe I’ll just stand in the back yard, and when she looks my way, I’ll violently rip the heads off stuffed bunnies.
If they really care about them, they should look into taking better care of them. Keeping them inside and actually treating them as pets. The way things are now, the cats have just as good a chance as getting hit by a car or dying in a fight with another animal or succumbing to disease as they do of being removed by a neighbor.
And it’s apparently your and his assertion that the racoons that move in won’t do the same things? Have neither of you ever met one?
Well, that’s why I object to his behavior. He has been offered other solutions, he just isn’t interested in them. He’s made a very mild inconvenience into a potential neighborhood situation, with the cats the loser whichever side wins, for no real good reason. In my accounting, that’s a terrible way to behave.
I look forward to his next thread about getting the mice out of his house, and the accompanying confrontation with the neighbor with the birdfeeder.
Yes, intentionally inflicting emotional distress on a child is likely illegal. I’d be happy to look at whatever else you might conjure up, but I can’t conjure it up for you.
I never said this, and I never bother defending things I didn’t say.
Sorry for the double post - this wasn’t there when I was replying before.
Sure - I actually agree with all of that. I don’t think that the next door neighbor feeding wild cats (if that’s what they actually are - I’m not sure that’s been established) is a good idea, but I do think now that they’re there, a solution that leads directly to the death of the cats for the sin of behaving like (reasonably well behaved, actually) cats doesn’t help anyone. Especially said cats.
Sure, a wild fox will avoid humans, as a rule, but that’s only in the “won’t let you pet it” sense, and that has never prevented one from moving in under your porch. I’m not kidding about my neighborhood - I have one neighbor 10 feet away on one side, another 15 feet on the other side, a neighbor directly across the street, and about 800 feet of back yard before the yard of the neighbor behind me begins. That has never prevented small herds of five or six deer from wandering down the street at night, grazing on across-the-street-neighbor’s ornamental grass. In a heavily populated area like, say, Long Island, the wildlife lives all around you because they have no where to go that isn’t heavily populated. There’s a reason that they hold bear hunts around here - we have bunches and bunches of them, and the government is trying to keep the numbers down. I have no problem with that, though I’d prefer that the hunters eat the meat, at least.
But killing cats because they leave dead mice on the porch for you? There are plenty of owls and such nearby that will take over doing the same thing the week after the cats are gone. In the meantime, the cats will have paid the price for nothing. I find that thought sickening.