Yes, we get it - Tom Brady is *the* quarterback

The BBQ Pit
1

(Disclaimer: I loathe the Patriots, always have, always will.)

I went ahead and watched the end of the Pats/Ravens game. Ravens almost had 'em, but for some bad luck & stupid calls in the last minutes of the game.

I understand that the Pats are undefeated, and that Tom Brady is apparently the Second Coming. I’ll even concede that he’s a good quarterback, even though it pains me to do so.

But Mr. ESPN Announcer (sorry, not sure which one it was), do we HAVE to spend the whole last two minutes of the game listening to you suck Tom Brady’s dick? How can you even commentate that way when your mouth is so busy slurping up everything you can off his sweaty balls? Can you please fellate him some other time in private, so we don’t have to listen to you making sucky-sucky noises?

And it doesn’t seem to be limited to just the ESPN guys, it’s damn near every color commentator at any game they play.

Ok, he’s a great quarterback. Ok, the Pats are having an exceptional year. WE GET IT, honestly, we’ve noticed, I swear. It is NOT NECESSARY to praise Brady so much you’ve got his cum oozing out your ears.

I know it’s only going to get worse; I just hope to Og that someone puts them out of my misery soon…it’s possible, we’ve seen it come close. Maybe Pittsburg next week…

But damn I hate listening to this sycophantic blather.

2

I’m so angry about that game that I can’t form a coherent sentence, except to ask “what the fuck?” Seriously, your biggst problem with that game was the announcer?

3

The Eagles almost beat 'em. The Ravens almost beat 'em. The Steelers are better than both of them. Therefore…

4

[QUOTE=Bearflag70]
The Eagles almost beat 'em. The Ravens almost beat 'em. The Steelers are better than both of them. Therefore…
[/QUOTE]

The Patriots are going to win in the fourth quarter by scoring with 25 seconds left on the clock, again?

5

[QUOTE=Mosier]
I’m so angry about that game that I can’t form a coherent sentence, except to ask “what the fuck?” Seriously, your biggst problem with that game was the announcer?
[/QUOTE]

There was lots to be angry about in the game, true, but since I was rooting AGAINST the Pats, and not automatically FOR the Ravens, I’m picking my poison.

I will say, however, what the fuck is it with badly timed time-outs and coaches this week, anyway?

6

While I’m totally indifferent to the Pats, anyone who’s rooting FOR the Ravens suffers from terminal brain damage.

I’m with Bearflag, and eagerly awaiting the Steelers march to victory.

7

I think the Patriots spent most of their time against Indianapolis sitting on the Colts helmets, cause they got horseshoes falling outta their ass.

8

[QUOTE=Indyellen]
(Disclaimer: I loathe the Patriots, always have, always will.)

I went ahead and watched the end of the Pats/Ravens game. Ravens almost had 'em, but for some bad luck & stupid calls in the last minutes of the game.

I understand that the Pats are undefeated, and that Tom Brady is apparently the Second Coming. I’ll even concede that he’s a good quarterback, even though it pains me to do so.

But Mr. ESPN Announcer (sorry, not sure which one it was), do we HAVE to spend the whole last two minutes of the game listening to you suck Tom Brady’s dick? How can you even commentate that way when your mouth is so busy slurping up everything you can off his sweaty balls? Can you please fellate him some other time in private, so we don’t have to listen to you making sucky-sucky noises?

And it doesn’t seem to be limited to just the ESPN guys, it’s damn near every color commentator at any game they play.

Ok, he’s a great quarterback. Ok, the Pats are having an exceptional year. WE GET IT, honestly, we’ve noticed, I swear. It is NOT NECESSARY to praise Brady so much you’ve got his cum oozing out your ears.

I know it’s only going to get worse; I just hope to Og that someone puts them out of my misery soon…it’s possible, we’ve seen it come close. Maybe Pittsburg next week…

But damn I hate listening to this sycophantic blather.
[/QUOTE]

This, from someone in Indy?

You should be glad they’re knobbing him; isn’t Peyton Manning the official spokesperson of Tom Brady’s dick? All his endorsements are running together these days.

9

The OP reads like NFL slash fiction. :slight_smile:

As a fan of two teams that couldn’t find a quarterback even as good as the bad Manning, I understand the fascination with Brady and, lately, Romo. I do look at those guys and go, wow, they seem to know what they want to do out there.

As a nonpartisan observer, that was an unbelievable game last night. I am no big fan of the Raven’s D, (except maybe Reed), but they were on point, it was a real struggle.

I don’t know how you call the Gaffney play at the end. I think you have to say that he was still repositioning the ball, that it was no catch. But even then, there were a few downs left and things were looking inevitable.

10

[QUOTE=Trunk]
This, from someone in Indy?

You should be glad they’re knobbing him; isn’t Peyton Manning the official spokesperson of Tom Brady’s dick? All his endorsements are running together these days.
[/QUOTE]

You know, I almost put something in the OP about how I realized this complaint was coming from others last year regarding Payton Manning and I was going for equal opportunity bitching, but decided against it. Obviously, that was a mistake. :rolleyes:

At least the endorsements are amusing to listen to, most of the time. What I’m commenting on was gratuitous and unprofessional.

11

I stopped watching football years ago. The inanity of the color commentary wasn’t the only reason, or the biggest, but it was certainly a factor. I believe that the NFL literally has rules in place that encourage announcers to only talk positively about players. I would love to watch a game where this wasn’t done.

“Jones, back to pass…”

“Oh, that sucked. What the fuck was he thinking?”

“Well, you know, he’s about as smart as a sock full of doorknobs.”

“You got that right. They say beats his wife, have you heard that?

“You bet! I’d beat my wife too if she gave me kids that ugly. Have you seen them? I’d say the look like lawn gnomes, but their heads are all too big.”

“I’m with ya on the two boys, which aren’t even his, by the way. I think they belong to what’s-his-face on the Jets. His daughter, though, I think she’s hot.”

“Wait sec… did he just pass again? What down is it? Did you catch that?”

“Nope.”

12

I’ve often wondered if you could set up a podcast to call an NFL game live, or if that would run you afoul of some legal protections of the league. It seems analogous to the thing where peoplle do their own DVD commentaries, and that survives…

13

I’ve been a Pats fan for 30 years, and I can’t stand the ball-washing. But they do it to all of the stars-Brady, the good Manning, Farve*, now Romo. Hell, Mike Patrick on the old MNF crew was sooo bad about ball-washing Vick that I ended up watching with the sound off.

  • Every time I type Farve I want to add “I WANT A LITRE COLA.”
14

[QUOTE=Waverly]
I stopped watching football years ago. The inanity of the color commentary wasn’t the only reason, or the biggest, but it was certainly a factor. I believe that the NFL literally has rules in place that encourage announcers to only talk positively about players. I would love to watch a game where this wasn’t done.

“Jones, back to pass…”

“Oh, that sucked. What the fuck was he thinking?”

“Well, you know, he’s about as smart as a sock full of doorknobs.”

“You got that right. They say beats his wife, have you heard that?

“You bet! I’d beat my wife too if she gave me kids that ugly. Have you seen them? I’d say the look like lawn gnomes, but their heads are all too big.”

“I’m with ya on the two boys, which aren’t even his, by the way. I think they belong to what’s-his-face on the Jets. His daughter, though, I think she’s hot.”

“Wait sec… did he just pass again? What down is it? Did you catch that?”

“Nope.”
[/QUOTE]

Reminds me of the commentary in “Major League.”

15

[QUOTE=Bearflag70]
The Eagles almost beat 'em. The Ravens almost beat 'em. The Steelers are better than both of them. Therefore…
[/QUOTE]
Therefore the Patriots crush 'em by three touchdowns in a total laugher. You heard it here first.

No, I don’t have a rooting interest in the Pats (or any one NFL team, for that matter).

16

The thing that gets me is the after action report for the last two games makes it sound as though Tom Brady was solely responsible for bringing the Pts back to win it. There are no other players on that team besides Tom and Brady. No one catching the ball. No one running the ball. No one blocking or kicking. Only a single person. And that person is throwing the ball for back to back 100YD TD passes.

He’s a great QB, but people need to get off his jock already.

17

Not only is he the quarterback of every sports announcer’s (wet) dreams, he possesses the amazing ability to make his hairline advance rather than recede.

Must be plugs, since Rogaine is a banned substance (masks steroids).

18

[QUOTE=Trunk]
This, from someone in Indy?

You should be glad they’re knobbing him; isn’t Peyton Manning the official spokesperson of Tom Brady’s dick? All his endorsements are running together these days.
[/QUOTE]
Thank you, thank you. It is a running joke in our family. When the Colts and Pats played each other, I was sure it would turn into an orgy as the announcers got orgasmic, repeatedly saying “Tom Brady” and “Peyton Manning” every other minute. It was a dream come true for them to slobber on the balls of both QBs at the same time. I’m surprised the announcers desk didn’t have a few boxes of Kleenix and an extra large bottle of Jergens so they could stroke themselves while they discussed the plays.

Enough already! I thought that Michael Jordan was overexposed when he was playing but those two are pathetic. Shut up, stop the commercials for everything except Preparation H, and play the fucking game.

And announcers, wipe the cum off your lips and find another player to blow.

19

[QUOTE=MadTheSwine]
I think the Patriots spent most of their time against Indianapolis sitting on the Colts helmets, cause they got horseshoes falling outta their ass.
[/QUOTE]

This line is pretty amazing. No lie.

And it’s awful.

But I think the Big XII championship game was just a Sam Bradford led orgy. I can’t believe that the announcers saw that game from their knees in the Sooner locker room. I guess they caught the updates when they went to go grind on Daniel.

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

20

This the gayest football related thread evar. Think of adding Madden and Favre to the three-way QB circle jerk.