Curse you all with the fury of four a Cygni s.
Yo mama’s so fat even the One Ring can’t transport her to the Shadow Realm.
Yo mama’s so fat that when Gandalf talks about the Crack of Doom, he don’t mean Orodruin.
Yo mamma’s so ugly, she makes vogons look good
Only when dealing with relativistic mass of yo’ mama, however. Invariant mass of yo’ mama (which is what we’re pretty much dealing with here) is an inherent property regardless of momentum. At least that’s the way I understand it, but IANA quantum physicist.
Oh, and yo’ mama’s so stupid, when I asked her what manufacturer produced her processor chip, she told me Frito Lay.
Variants of this have already been posted, but
Yo momma’s so fat, lightcones at her surface fail to intersect future null infinity.
Hoopy Frood, you’re correct, except that you’re not a relativistic physicist, rather than not being a quantum physicist.
Yo mama so dumb, she doesn’t know the difference between relativity and quantum mechanics!
Yo mama so dumb, she tried to get a Sierpinski carpet installed in her living room, and tried to use a Menger sponge for birth control.