You wouldn’t say that if adding ten years to JRR Tolkien’s life, and providing him with a really good secretary so that he could whip “The Lay of Luthien” into shape, were an option.
I’d rather go back in time and tell Jim Henson to see a doctor about that cough.
Isn’t that cutting for stone clause obsolete now? I was under the impression that y’all shattered stones with ultrasound or something, and then let the patient piss it out in tiny grains of sandlike particles.
That would clearly be a net good for the universe. You can’t possibly expect me to help.
Why not ask if we could scoot back in time and tell Elvis not to strain at stool? Or stop Mark David Chapman? Or Sirhan Sirhan? Go back in time and kill John Travolta before he made Battlefield Earth? Go back in time and kidnap Joe Lieberman while he is waiting for the call from Al Gore to ask him to be Vice President. Head back to Yale in the 60s and film W doing blow and give him more booze?
I began the thread when a Michael Jackson song was playing on my media player thingie. No other reason.
Also, John Travolta starred in Michael, which as everyone knows is the greatest movie ever made. He’s earned an exemption from pointless murder.
ETA: You seem to forget that all my CS threads are deliberately pointless. 
Given the scenario as presented, and lacking the ability to reprogram the scooter, I’d do some research on someone else who was in mortal peril that day within walking distance of the Jackson mansion, and try to help them. In and of itself, saving Jackson’s life that day would be an inherent good, but you always also have to consider the opportunity cost. And I could probably accomplish something much more good on my trip, if I don’t spend my time trying to save Jackson.
I’m not going to chance the Nazis taking over just for Michael Jackson!
I don’t know how it would happen, but it’s the inevitable result of mucking about with time.
Silly boy. Saving Michael Jackson cannot possibly cause the rise of the Nazis. It will however contribute to Sarah Palin becoming president in 2013, but it’s not like that isn’t gonna happen anyway.
Where is the “Who cares?” option?
It’s at the upper right hand corner of your screen; it looks like a little red x.
No, because I couldn’t care less about Michael Jackson or his music.
That’s the booby-trapped scooter remark.
I just know this will work out like that time they prevented the pyramids from being built, and for three whole iterations people were writing to newpaper columnists asking “What is that thing on the back of the dollar bill?”
Almost as bad a propagation as removing the third common “-gry” word from the English Language.
Why would I undo what took years of planning to carry out? But perhaps I’ve said too much…
“Hengry” is the word you seek; it refers to the condition of a person starving for lack of the flesh of fowls. Check the OED if you don’t believe me.
He used up his exemption with Broken Arrow. And he earned a death fatwah for Battlefield Earth.
You are of course wrong. Admittedly both those movies are execrable, but even combined their crappiness does not approach Michael’s level of greatness. It’s not like he was in Star Trek 90210.
Michael? With Andie MacDowell?! My friend, you need to check your meds. 
I will grant the Travolta’s performance was decent, but the movie… ugh. I’ll take Dogma any day.
You of course are trying to tempt me into saying <blank> of a <blank>. I shall not, though you are, as I am not Gandalfy in October.
Speak not to me of that abortion of filmmaking. It’s not often that a film manages to be preachy and vulgar and the same time but Dogma managed it. I think Tyler Perry was somehow involved.