You need a motor on that thing... why??

The BBQ Pit
1

Today I was out buying a new shirt when I heard a buzzing motor sound behind me. At first I thought it was a motorized chair stores offer for their less mobile customers. The sound just zipped through my mind and I didn’t give it much thought…

A few minutes later I heard the same sound again. As I turned my head I was actually surprised by what I saw. An electric baby stroller. WHAT?!?! AN ELECTRIC BABY STROLLER?!

Now wait a minute.

I understand the US is in a period of over blown decadence. SUVs larger then some people homes, giant plates of food at restaurants, super sized everything, mobile phones with so many features you almost can’t even use it as a phone, and televisions and DVD players for your car… but a motorized baby cart?

I watched the woman for a short time wondering if she perhaps had a back problem or showed some sign she needed a motor assisted cart to push around 20 some pounds of baby meat. Nope, I didn’t see anything outright. She seemed to function fairly well.

I started wondering what benefit a motorized baby cart could bring to the table. Now, I’m no stranger to baby carts. I’ve used them before. The one single thing I remember from using them is the ease of take out and break down between uses. Upon inspection of this cart it seemed to not have this. For one, it looked quite heavy. My guess with the battery, motor and reinforced frame, it might hit around 40-50 pounds - with the added benefit of being bulky.

The woman driving this silly thing had a somewhat small frame, so I would guess getting this monster in and out of her car would be somewhat of a struggle for her.

The weight of this baby, which looked to be about 6 months, might have been around 20 pounds. It didn’t look fat and it didn’t have a monstrously oversized head, it looked like a regular baby of regular baby size. Now I could totally understand the need of powered stroller if the baby looked like “the worlds fattest baby” as seen on the cover of supermarket tabloids. I mean, I’m not jumping for joy at the thought of shoving Baby Rotund the 300 pound infant through the streets. I think in this case I’d consider one of those motorized forklifts that go “beep-beep-beep” when they back up. But a 20 pound baby I think most people can handle without the need of power assist.

Ok, so I think a powered baby stroller is stupid and anyone who uses one just might be, in my book, perhaps a little lazy and stupid. But wait,. My story gets better.

I see this woman later in the parking lot. As I expected she wasn’t having a good time hefting this machine into the back of her HUGE Cadillac Escalade. I had to stand and watch to see if the benefit of a powered baby stroller outweighed the hassle of getting it into the SUV. Plus, I’ll admit I rather enjoyed watching someone decadence bite them in the ass.

So she tries a few times to wrangle this bugger into the SUV, but honestly it didn’t seem like she was trying very hard. And then, for the second time today, I was actually surprised by what I saw. She hit up an fellow walking by for assistance. I couldn’t hear what she said, but he hefted the thing into the back for her as she directed him with pointed fingers and arm movements. She waved a good bye and pulled herself into her suburban tank.

I don’t even know how to finish this story. I’m at a loss for words. But I will say this…

AN ELECTRIC BABY STROLLER?! AN ELECTRIC BABY STROLLER?! AAAAAAAAARGH!

2

Heh, now she needs to add an electric power lift to the back of her crapscalade to get her electric stroller into it…

(generic rant about the stupidity of “luxury SUV’s” that will never see off-road use, why not call them what they are, 4wd luxury cars…)

the hacker in me would love to patch in a more powerful motor into the stroller and see what 0-60 times you could get with it

heck, why not do away with pushing it at all and rig up a remote control for steering it, voila! R/C baby stroller, ditch the baby and you have a nice lightweight frame to build a BattleBot on :wink:

America, land of the lazy :wink:

3

“Remote control?” Screw that! Keep Junior in there and let babies fight anime style. Sure, he might not have the fine motor skills to work the mecha perfectly, but it’ll still be amusing.

4

Probably the baby will grow up to ride one of these:

http://www.electric-scooters-electric-scooters.com/reviews_Razor.htm

Sad. Just sad.

5

On a semi-related note, one time I was in a supermarket when I heard this weird “woot-woot” sound behind me. I turned and saw nothing unsual. A few seconds later I heard it again and spotted the four year-old in someone’s shopping cart pulling on his wool cap tassels and making a sound like a steam engine whistle.
It had nothing to do with electric baby carts, but it was pretty damn funny.

6

There was an arcade game with a mecha riding baby as one of the playable characters. I can’t remember what it was called though.

7

A mini Tommy lift for the stroller and a swing arm baby lift to get the kid out of the cart and into the baby seat equipped with a 30 inch plazma screen/DVD combo, electric baby bottle warmer and perhaps an automatic wet/dry vac attached to a robotic arm to suck the crap out of the diapers when baby makes a poo-poo.

This leaves mom with more time to chat on her mobile phone and do her nails when she drives.

8

Can anyone find a picture of an electric baby stroller? How does it work, does it run by itself and how do you steer it?

9

I blame Debbie Gibson. She used to go on and on about that “electric youth” shit.

10

My PAL Motorized Baby Stroller.
I don’t know if it’s what you saw - it’s hard to tell how bulky/heavy this one might be from the photo.

11

I tried to find one online but couldn’t.

It looked like a beefed up stroller. On the handle was a large, flat, toggle switch (forward & reverse?). It looked like just the rear wheels were powered. The front wheels looked like regular spinny stroller wheels.

The wheels themself looked more knobby, like BMX bike tires, but where the same size found on other stroller.

It was covered in all sorts of blue canvas - covers, shades, and seat.

12

No. The one I saw was different. I seem to recall a box that went across the bottom along the back wheel axel. This one was also dark blue with a black frame.

13

You’re probably thinking of Captain Commando. The character was called Baby Commando, and can be seen in a screenshot here.

14

That’s it. This really is the place for arcane knowledge, isn’t it?

15

It’s called the Peg Perego - Dinamico and the company is Italian. Lazy Italians! How’d they ever build Rome? Oh that’s right! Slaves!

Stroller Queen! - 2004 Stroller Previews

16

I read the thread title and thought, “Because it’s FUN!”

Then I realized you weren’t talking about bar stools.

17

The great thing is in the Marvel vs Capcom games, if you play Captain Commando, you can summon him as one of your special attacks. I wonder how many people played those games and had no idea what the heck that was about? :slight_smile:

Me, I liked CC. Not Capcom’s best beat’em’up, but there really is no way they can top their “Aliens vs Predator” game.
Anyway. When I was out running yesterday, there was a jogger pushing a baby stroller. She looked like she could’ve used one of these motorized things. How fast can they go?

18

Jet propelled wheelchair!

Lsura, you evil person, that link has the loudest bloody sample of a toddler saying “you GOTTA love it”, and now everyone in my house thinks I’m a NAMBLA member… :smack:

19

Probably a vain hope in defense of the lady, but are there a lot of hills in your town?

20

Let’s take the aforementioned carriage, fit it with a steering axle, a GPS locator, collision avoidance logic and a small memory. Then, it can follow a programmed route to take baby out for a stroll, freeing Mother to do other more important things, like…boffing the pool boy!

Hey-anything that further removes parents from parenting has to have a market niche, right? :rolleyes: