I am the Angel of Death. During the course of your every day life you have unwittingly, indirectly caused numerous deaths and as a reward (or punishment) I am here to bless (or curse) you with knowledge of your own demise.
I will tell you either:
Your age when you will die
OR
How you will die
You must choose one. If you do not choose I will tell you one or the other anyways.
What’s it gonna be?
ETA: The when and how of your death are set in stone; somehow, it’s gonna happen when and how it’s supposed to, no matter what.
Knowing when, I can do some sensible scheduling, investments, vacation planning, etc.
Knowing how, without knowing when, would only frustrate me. I’d keep trying to fight it. “Drowning.” Okay, I’ll never be able to go swimming again. It would detract from my enjoyment of life.
Besides, there aren’t any good ways. It’s like knowing exactly what torture method the Holy Inquisition is going to use. Does it really matter?
I think I’ve posted this before: many years ago, Marilyn vos Savant, a genius with a column in Parade Magazine was asked if she would like know when she would die. She thought it would be great, because then she could go skydiving. She didn’t factor in the possibility of breaking every bone in her body and suffering unbearable pain until her preordained death date.
I was originally going to choose the time of my death, because I could make plans based on that based on it (retirement, child raising, major purchases, etc.). But then I realized that knowing exactly how much time I had left would probably torture me for the rest of my life. With that in mind, I decided to go with the manner of my death, because that would probably result in it being mostly a surprise (until it drew near, at least).
Then again, I could end up being tormented by obsessing over the manner of my death. “Killed by a student driver? Is it while I’m teaching my kid to drive? Is it tomorrow? Next week? Oh no, the local high school starts driver’s ed in two weeks. Oh shit oh shit oh shit.”
I’d rather not know either, so you’re a real asshole, AoD.
Well, you already know you won’t live forever. Does that torture you? What if you’re told that you’ll live to a hundred. Wouldn’t that be more of a relief?
I wonder how far into the future my death would have to be for me not to be bothered about it, if I was told. If you tell me I’ll be dead tomorrow, I’ll have a panic attack. Five years? Yeah, that’ll ruin my day. Ten years? Well, not so bad. Twenty years? Yeah, whatever, I can deal with it later, then. goes back to playing video games, unbothered
For me, a lot would depend on how much information is contained in the ‘how’ part. If you tell me I’m going to die of pneumonia, that doesn’t tell me much. If you tell me I’m going to die of pneumonia brought on by Alzheimer’s, that tells me considerably more.
So if all I’d get in the ‘how’ is the immediate cause of death, I’d go for ‘when.’ But if the ‘how’ included (if applicable) the name of the affliction that brought me to the point where something was gonna finish the job before too long, I’d go with the ‘how.’
Crap, voted before I saw the ETA. Thought the how would be more useful, if it came back as something that you could catch early you could go to the docs and get it sorted. If it’s set in stone, ignorance would be bliss I think.
Yes, but it all comes down to what the answer is. If I was told that I’d live to be 100, I probably would be ok with that. If I was told I’d live to 50, it might suck the flavor out of the next few decades. Then again, perhaps it would jolt me into making the most of the time I had left. I dunno.
But then you would drown in a way that wasn’t adding fun to your life. It would be a real pisser to deny yourself the enjoyment of swimming only to die in bathtub in the nursing home at 99.
But she could have gone skydiving shortly before her death without a parachute from 10000 feet and lived long enough to make the record books as not only being the smartest woman in the world but also hold the record for surviving a jump without a parachute…
Myself, I’d like to know so that I could spend every penny I had right up until that day. I’d die with only loose change in my pocket and no other assets.
This raises an interesting point: does knowing the how change the when, and vice versa? Or are both set in stone?
You mean you wouldn’t want to die heavily in debt? Ten credit cards, all maxed out? Car, house, and boat loans all ready to default? People can’t inherit debt, right?
Well I don’t live my life like that now so I would like to think that the knowledge wouldn’t actually change that aspect of how I conduct myself.
But on the other hand, just knowing that there actually is an angel of death would most likely reaffirm my belief in God so much that I might be more mindful of how I lived my life. Being given this type of knowledge would basically mean that I had been touched by God, and from my readings of the Bible most people who were touched by God had some crazy assed shit happen to them soon afterward. So yes, the Angle of Death is a real pisser. I'm going to be given choices and then be judged on those choices. I'd prefer not to be another story in the book of good and bad examples.
I don’t really want to know either, but I guess I’d rather know how, since at least it would mean there would be some things I could stop worrying about. Like, say, if I knew I was going to die in a car accident, at least I could be sure it wouldn’t be cancer or Alzheimer’s or whatever else I may have been dreading, and vice versa.
You would end up being the guy that couldn’t remember they found a cure for cancer and committed suicide by car wreak on the way to treatment. Yea, I watched way too much Twilight Zone in college.
