I consider this song a novelty because it’s only played once a year. I love the Kinks’ song “Father Christmas”.
Very cynical…like a good Kinks song should be.
“Father Christmas give us your money
We don’t want your stinkin’ toys
We’ll beat you up if you don’t hand it over
Give all the toys to the little rich boys”
–Gail
“Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place.” --John Cleese
Nope, nope, nope. The greatest novelty Christmas tune has to be “Who Put the Dick on the Snowman?” Can’t remember who does it, but Bob and Tom play it every year. I laugh until tears stream down both cheeks each time I hear it.
“Jingle Bell Rock” was by Bobby Sherman (early 70s).
I like “Jingle Bells” and other Christmas carols meowed by the Jingle Cats.
Remember “Yulenet” by Satn Frebeg and Daws Butler?
“You Ain’t Gettin’ Diddly Squat” and “It’s Christmas and I Wonder Where I Am” from the Bob & Tom Show.
“Santa Claus and His Old Lady,” by Cheech & Chong–the only title of theirs I like.
I have a great song by Pat Godwin called “A Goyisha Hanukah.” I put it into a MP3 (and zipped it up) is anyone wants it, please e-mail me! It’s quite hilarious…
The lyrics are as follows. Please forgive the spelling of some of the Jewish things… I’m only 1/2 Jewish…
We’be been dating for a month or twoish
How could I know her last name Green was Jewish
With long blonde hair and her first name Veronica
Now we’re going to her place for Hanukah
Meet Uncle Morty, he just had surgery
His wife Sophie, with the gaudy jewelry
Little children playing dredel, dredel
Look at all the strange food laid out on the table
“Have some chraplock (sp) and pickled herring”
Thanks Mrs. Green, I’m not quite that daring
“Vat! No herring for for a fine young Jewish boy?
Oh my God, she’s dating another goy!”
They light a candle on the menorah
I have no idea just what they’re for-a
Have some Manoshevitz and put on this yamika
No I’ll have a Bud, it’s a goyisha Hanukah
Come have Sadie’s wonderful gefelter fish
What’s a nice goy… Doing in a place like this!
I love the Christmas song by The Pogues. I think it’s called “Fairytale of New York”. Not necessarily novelty, yet highly comical. Sample lyrics: “It was Christmas Eve Day in the Drunk Tank…”, and “You scumbag, you maggot, you cheap, lousy faggot, Happy Christmas you ass, I thank God it’s our last”. Heehee, it makes me giggle just thinking of it.
Thanks, Rilch. The minute I saw the title, I was thinking, What the heck is the title of the nuclear Christmas song. And there it was in Rilch’s post.
Also:
I Want a Hippopotumus for Christmas
The Redneck Ten Days of Christmas
Leroy, the Redneck Reindeer
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Santa’s Gonna Come in a Stagecoach
(It’s a novelty song if I say it’s a novelty song)
Favorite non-novelty but non-traditional songs:
Til’ Santa’s Gone (Milk and Cookies)
There’s a New Kid in Town
There’s one I heard when I was living in the South and, unfortunately, I don’t hear it up here in NY. It’s called “Disfunctional Family Christmas” and it’s gotta be the best novelty song ever. It’s about some redneck family. You have to love a Christmas song that mentions buying tampons!!
“They have the internet on computers now.”–Homer J. Simpson
I think it’s called Pissed off X-Mas. He sings very fast and for the life of me I can’t find the tape or remember a snippet of lyrics. Dr. Demento plays it.
Dr. Demento and friend singing “I’m a Christmas Tree.” It sounds, basically, like the two of them have had waaaaaaay too much egg nog:
(Shouted more than sung
“I’m a Christmas tree! I/m a Christmas tree!
Everybody hangs their ornaments on me!
Oh Santa Claus!
Oh, Santa Claus!
He breaks lots of laws!
He trespasses…he breaks and enters…
He travels all around the world without a valid passport!
I’m a Christmas Tree! I’m a Christmas tree!
People throw me out on New Year’s Eve! (sobbing)
I’m a… Hanukkah Bush!
I’m a whole lot like…
a Jewish Christmas tree!”
I love putting that one on the voicemail at Christmas. I’ve actually had complete strangers–wrong numbers–leave messages because the song cracked them up so much.
I used to think the world was against me. Now I know better. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
That old Christmas song by Run DMC (can’t remember the title, dammit).
The Twelve Days of Christmas by the Mackenzie Brothers.
Walking In a Nuclear Winterland (A song I made up in high school :)).
Happy Hanuka by Adam Sandler.
Not a song parody per se, but there was an articlew in National Lampoon’s old humor magazine about the Twelve Days of Christmas. It was a series of letters from the recipiant of the traditional gifts, and how she was touched at first, but quickly got annoyed, then furious, and finally sues the gift giver for harrasment just around the time the nine dancing women got delivered by UPS.
I forgot, Sealemon! The Run-DMC song is “Christmas in Hollis”. That’s one of my favorites too. The video is hilarious with that evil-looking little elf running around.
