(And, coincidently it occured on a Thai beach.)
So I’m at the beach with Mr Elbows, Mr Grumpy (half of another couple we know) and another male friend I’ll call Cake. (That would be the Thai pronounciation for ‘Craig’.)
Mr Elbows is floating about in the spectacularly beautiful and chrystal clear South China Sea, on an inner tube. It’s a postcard beautiful day and Mr Grumpy is bobbing in the water near by. I am 30 or 40 yrds away in shallower water, lost in my own world. Cake in lying on the beach catching some rays.
It becomes clear to me that the boneheads (Mr Elbows & Mr Grumpy) are playing about with something interesting. They are clustered together and intently looking at something in the water. So I moisie on over to have a look. Getting closer I see what they are so interested in. It’s a snake. Not a large snake but very colourful and clearly a water snake. Mostly they are just observing but they are getting awfully close in my opinion. Standing some distance from them I point out that while I could be mistaken, I once saw a National Geographic special on water snakes and I seemed to recall that they were highly poisonous. I even pointed out that I was certain I had heard the phrase ‘dead before you get out of the water’.
Of course, two big men, having already survived several months of hard travel through rougher spots than a bloody beach are not going to listen to the nervous musing of one small girl.
I get out of the water.
Now I join Cake on the beach and explain to him what I know and suspect. We can now see that Mr Grumpy is coming up on the beach. He has come to get a stick, but all he can find is the claw thingy that comes down with the coconuts, and back he goes.
Now they are sort of poking it / coralling it with this stick. One is floating as close as possible to the thing in his inner tube and the other is slapping the water with the stick.
Cake and I sit watching intently from the beach. When along comes a young Thai man. Who cannot help but grow interested in what these two boneheaded white guys are up to. Cake and I are amused. He wades into the water till he is close enough to get a better look.
At which point he stops dead in his tracks and begins to slowly back out of the ocean. We can only see his back, of course, but we can clearly see the faces of Mr Grumpy and Mr Elbows. His behaviour has caught there attention in a way that my warning failed to. From the beach the only words we can hear the Thai fellow say are, ‘bite’ and ‘die’.
Cake and I are splitting our sides we’re laughing so hard as these two boneheads timidly drag their sorry asses up onto the beach leaving the highly poisonous water snake to go on it’s merry way unmolested.
It was several years ago now, but when we get together, Cake and I still laugh about the look on their faces when the that Thai guy started backing out of the sea.
(A little knowledge isn’t near as dangerous as a little testosterone if you ask me!)