Hi Punoqllads! What a perfect simulpost!
If I changed my username to Nobody’sMommy, I wonder how it would go over.
Nah.
Where the hell do you get off categorising other people’s children en masse as “little gits”? Dickhead.
In Arab culture, it’s customary for men to take their eldest son’s name and incorporate it into their nickname. I’ve always thought that was pretty cool.
Therefore, when my first child is born this February (God willing) I may very well change my username to Abu [baby’s name], OP be damned.
I agree completely.
Who are you, and what have you done with Reeder?
I have a slight problem in general with mothers who call themselves “moms.” To my way of thinking, a mother is what you are, “Mom” is what your kids call you. Calling yourself a mom is sort of like giving yourself a title.
“I’m a mom.” “I love being a mom.” Like the OP said, it is to barf.
Irrational and pedantic, I know. I can’t help it – it’s just one of those little things that make me wince internally. (Probably has to do with my own less-than-wonderful relationship with my own mother. I don’t call her Mom; she hasn’t earned it).
Not everybody’s children of course, just the child of WiddleChasitysMom. If you are miffed that I have appropriated your preferred title, many apologies.
I could have used the term “sprog” (as is customary on the Brats board), but felt that was a bit over the top.
And by the way, my dog can beat up your honor student.
I know what the OP means, to an extent. Especially on other boards where parenting stuff is the major topic, “Soandsosmom” types often stick out as lacking any identity or self-worth (going from the content of their posts, not just their names).
But when I think about it, the thing is, you have to come up with a unique name, which often eliminates simply using your first name and many common words. So it may largely be a matter of convenience.
Also, it occured to me that as a pudgy housewife who has named herself after a gorgeous badass warrior woman, I don’t have much standing to say someone’s choice of username is pathetic. 
My big concern is for baby#2. Or #3. Usually it’s only one kid they claim to be mom of, which is fine until the second kid comes along. Will they change their name? Or will child #2 suffer unbearable rejection?
In real life I sometimes refer to myself as “Molly’s Mom” or “James’ Mom” when introducing myself to people who know my kids, but not me. But I quickly tell them who I am, really. But now my kids are adults, so I’m not as eager to be identified only as their mom.
I get it too. People are inordinately proud of spawning. Well, you know, anyone can do it, just about.
It’s not that I think you shouldn’t be proud, it’s just…well, it doesn’t exactly seem a cut above the ordinary, if you know what I mean.
I hope I expressed myself clearly.
Look, there’s pride in an accomplishment.
But, XXXXMom simply indicates the user has accomplished getting knocked up, carrying the. . .git. . .to term, and naming it XXXX.
It is to compare with putting a bumper sticker on your car that says, “XXXX is an honor roll student at Dumbville Elementary.”
On the scale of user names, it’s right below naming yourself after your cat, and slightly above naming yourself after an elephant’s proboscis.
Never said that I’m not a dog! 
Abu Jed?
Abu Sparky?
Abu Bubba?
Abu Boo Boo?
Abu Kensington?
Abu Dweezil?
Abu Bigus Dickus?
This is one of my worries as my husband and I try to get pregnant. I see these usernames on pregnancy message boards and all the talk is about their children, their avatars are their children. A lot of them seem dull-witted and flighty (and Republican, I might add ).
I can certainly understand being proud of your child, but I don’t want to lose my identity and be one of those mothers who only talk about their children and has no interest in any other conversation than spit-up and breast-feeding. I also understand that a baby is a significant life-change, so a lot of conversation will be about the baby, but some of my friends who are mothers now, don’t talk about anything BUT their children.
So when I see a username like that, I’m also irrationally making a judgment about that person. Notice I said “irrational”. I know it’s not fair, but there it is.
My first experiences with message boards took place on parenting boards and, let me tell you, it was nauseating AND bizarre. I remember one woman wore her child’s Asperger’s diagnosis like a badge of honor. Another told me that cow’s milk caused diabetes. And so many of them implied that sending one’s child to daycare was like sending one’s child to Auschwitz. And the birth stories! Ugh! You could practically feel the amnionic fluid running down your own leg and that’s a feeling I am NOT looking to relive! But, looking back, I have pity for these women because they didn’t feel they had any other experiences to share.
Of course, none of their kids were as cute or smart as mine so I pitied them for that too.
My very first username online was Ginosmom, because I couldn’t think of anything more original.
Now I’m named after my now-defunct business. How sad is THAT?
I used to belong to a lot of budgeting lists, and I found the signatures more nauseating than the “-mom” names. For instance: “Jeffswife, loving wife to Jeff since 6/16/85, doting mother to Bratley (8/01/87) and Snotleigh (11/6/89), and cuddler of one Very Special Puppy named Buster (10/13/92).” Ick.
Some of these parents had six or eight kids, and you’d have to scroll past a long list of names, birthdates, and accomplishments just to finish reading the thread. It was sort of like receiving a mass-mailing Christmas letter in every message.
I like this one best, perhaps because it could be a dog or a baby.
Truthfully, I never really thought about the SpawnMom/SprogDad names, I just assume people picked a screen name they could remember…but if that was true they’d all be something like “Jethro, Noooo!” because that’s what parents really say, in my experience.
It’s easy. All children are little gits, except your own.
Fang is a wonderful little man who can say “Dadda” with the best of them. Unfortunately, the best of them are little gits.
Why don’t you play some patty-cake to pass the time?
Hmm, it looks like I’ve been pitted.
I picked my username not because I’m proud of my kids or of my ability to reproduce, but because it someone defines who I am. I could have picked **I’m A DBA ** or I like to read, but WVMom conveys more of what influences me on a day to day basis.
I’ve thought about changing it just because it’s a bit too cutesy and maybe too descriptive, but, eh, too much trouble.
Don’t forget the listing of each miscarriage as an “angel baby.” I guess whatever helps you cope, go for it, but personally I find that incredibly macabre.