Zero Tolerance Strikes Again

I just typed this up for my journal, and I’m just going to repost it here:

Let’s see if I’ve calmed down enough to write this without too much profanity. I didn’t get to sleep last night until about 5am, so after I got Dominic up this morning, I went back to sleep. At about 8:15am, my phone rings. It’s the assistant principal at Dominic’s school and she’s being all pissy. “There was some trouble on the bus this morning,” she begins. “Dominic had a shocking pen and was shocking the other kids, and passing it around encouraging them to shock themselves.” She said this in a tone that would normally be reserved for phrases like “…he was beating their heads with a hammer…” and then she proceeded to tell me that she “hadn’t seen the video yet” (yes, the buses have cameras) but that she expected to be getting calls from “plenty of irate parents”. Um. Is our country really that sissified that parents would call the school to complain that someone on the school bus had, essentially, a joy buzzer? Good lord. Anyway, I’m sort of groggily nodding into the phone, waiting for her to tell me that he’s going to have to sit in the office for a few hours or something.

“He’s been suspended for five days,” she says. “That means he can come back next Wednesday, but I wouldn’t bother sending him for the last two days,” (next week is the last week of school) “because he won’t be allowed to participate in any activities.” Holy crap. I’m thinking…‘did I hear that right??’ Part of me is ticked off that Dominic took the pen to school–they aren’t supposed to bring toys and things–but mostly I’m reeling at the massive overkill punishment they’ve given him. “You need to come pick him up now,” she says.

“Uh, ok…” I stammer, still trying to wake up. I hang up, get dressed, and drive to the school. On the way I’m thinking about how much this sucks. Dominic is leaving shortly after school gets out to spend the summer with his dad and his grandma and camp and so on, and by the time that is over, we’ll have moved to Ohio. So he probably isn’t going to see any of these kids ever again. And now he’s being told he can’t even have the last few days of school? Can’t get his yearbook signed? Hell, he can’t even go back to the classroom to say goodbye to his teacher.

By the time I get to the school I’m pretty angry. This zero-tolerance bullshit has always pissed me off. I go to the office and the principal waves me back to the assistant principal’s office. She shows me the pen. I nod, “I know, we play with it at home.” I said that I thought the punishment was far too harsh for the “crime”. She got a condescending tone and told me that this was the policy of Cobb County. “I think the county’s policy is a very poor one then, for handling this situation,” I said. She then told me that she was “glad the county handles it that way” in a really snotty tone. I reminded her that Dominic was moving and was never going to see these kids again, and her response was “I know, and that’s why I’m so disappointed that he made this decision.”

Earlier this semester, Dominic was suspended for a few days for getting into a minor fight. He was being picked on at the time, but he did get aggressive back. This time he did nothing malicious at all. He was joking around with a harmless toy of the type that has been around for years and years and years, and at least from what he tells me, the kids on the bus all thought it was funny or cool (which I can believe). This is the kind of thing that if I’d brought it to school as a child, it might have been confiscated for the day as being disruptive, but it wouldn’t have even warranted being sent to the office, let alone sent home. And yet his suspension is almost twice as long as when he was in a fight, and he’s been told not to return to the school, ever again. I know from my experiences earlier this semester that the county policy is that you can’t even appeal a suspension that’s under 10 days long, so there was no point in fighting it.

I asked her for the pen back and she said no, that it was the school’s policy to keep things confiscated from kids. Oh jeeeezus. To me that’s just petty. I can see not giving it back to the kid, but not to give it back to the parent? The one who probably PAID for it? I walked back out into the hall to where Dominic was sitting. “Guess what, Dominic?” I said. “Your summer vacation just started early.” Then I turned to the assistant principal and told her “if you think I’m going to punish him at home for this, you’re mistaken.”

Actually, I am. He can’t watch TV or play on his computer for the rest of the day. That’s about the maximum amount of upset I can manage over bringing a gag like a shocking pen to school. I told him it was poor judgment and stupid of him to do, since he knew they weren’t allowed to bring stuff from home. But that’s it. It’s not like I’m even mad at him. I am, however, mad at the school.

And so Dominic came with me to my school today, because I had to work. He sat around reading while I worked on the promotional DVD for the visual arts department. I am going to call his school tomorrow and find out exactly why it was such a contraband item…was it really considered a weapon? I am also going to make sure the principal knows how much I think the school overreacted. I also need to find out if this will affect his grades and/or his ability to move on to sixth grade next fall. I’m so glad we’re moving, and he is going to get a fresh start…

You could always contact the Superintendent’s office and ask that they review the situation because you would hate for it to play out in the local paper or on the local TV news. That sort of thing makes great play during the local sweeps & the political nature of a senior administrator might just see that this was pure over-reaction by the principal and make it all go away.

The thing is, though, I don’t want to go to the media. I don’t want to put my son through that.

I have to agree with you, that’s an awfully silly reaction to a toy.

It’ll be interesting to see how this environment affects today’s kids as they grow up.

Then you won’t have justice. shrug. Your choice.

I wouldn’t see how your son would be going through much. It would be pretty much you. I doubt that he would have any retalitaion from the principal or anything, but you know, its your call and all being the mom.

I’m not after “justice” in some big sense of the word. I don’t think this is the case of the century, and in the long run it won’t matter–but I think they’re reacting STUPIDLY and I’m irritated by it. You have to choose your battles. Right now I am trying to sort through everything I own and pack to move several states away, sell my house (by owner), along with a bunch of other stuff in my life. Getting caught up in a big war with the school on a matter of principle is just not what I need right now, and certainly not what my son needs.

I disagree. If they let him back in class because I made a huge stink, I think he *would *be stigmatized by it. Regardless, there are only 7 days of school left, and by the time the fighting was done it would be moot anyway, because school would be out.

Let me just clarify here… I’m not asking for anyone’s ideas on how to get the school to change their mind on this matter. I think it’s a long shot that they ever would, and if they did, it would only be because of massive effort on my part, and I don’t think the situation is worth it, considering that school is almost over anyway. It’s not like they’re going to be learning a lot in the last week of school.

I was sort of figuring this would more turn into a discussion about how overreactive in general schools have gotten with these zero tolerance policies.

I agree with the school’s decision, quite frankly. If your kid tried to electrocute one of my kids with one of those fucking things I would not be a happy camper. I used to be a teacher. I am very familiar with the kind of [del]little shit[/del] kid who does things like that and the mother invariably thinks he’s an angel. You’ve already said this isn’t the first time he’s gotten in trouble for being aggressive in school (I know…he was being “picked on,” that’s what they all say and the moms always believe it. :rolleyes: ). Shocking other kids with a pen is obnoxious behavior. I don’t like zero tolerance policies as a rule but I don’t think this is an example of an overreaction.

Maybe you should concentrate on figuring out why your kid is acting out in school instead of excusing his behavior with your lame non-punishment. Parents like you were a huge part of the reason I quit working in schools.

I don’t have any kids in school, but I help write textbooks and so am aware of zero tolerance. I recently tried to write a “model essay” on the subject as an example of well-constructed persuasive writing. My boss almost let me put it in the book… and then, Virginia Tech. I think she was as disappointed as I was, but we both knew it just wouldn’t fly.

Your kid’s story ranks among the worst I came across doing research for the above. (I’d LOVE to hear the rationale whoever-it-was gave for “turning in” your kid for passing around a shock pen! :eek: ) Sadly, ZT does not seem to be going out of style. I just hope that by the time I have a kid in schools (assuming we don’t leave the country or resort to home-schooling) it will be as passe as requiring girls to wear skirts to school.

You might enjoy some of these…

Zero tolerance nightmares
Randy Cassingham’s zero tolerance page
Parents Against Zero Tolerance (Yahoo discussion group)

On preview: Diogenes the Cynic, my reading of the OP includes these points: first, the kid was previously aggressive only after being provoked. Second, at least some of the kids “shocked themselves” on purpose while the toy was being passed around. (Nobody’s gonna get electrocuted from one of those things, either.) While it’s possible the kid in question is one of the kids you characterize with phrases you cross out before posting, why assume?

You should send this story to Randy Cassingham. He’s got a ‘Zero Tolerance’ section of his blog with outrageous stories like yours.

My younger brother was expelled (yes really expelled) from high school his junior year because of zero tolerance bullshit. He and his friend were riding around after school in my brother’s small pickup when they stopped by an old property with a falling down barn. They decided to explore. My brother found some old rusted trinkets and his friend found an ancient rusted old knife blade like a small machete but with no handle. His friend wanted to clean it up and hang it on the wall. A few days later, my brother forgot some homework in his truck and the rule was that only the principle or teachers could retrieve things from vehicles. My brother requested their assistance. Half an hour later, the police came and took him away from school for “possessing” a large knife.

My mother is a world renowned speaker and author on education. She was even an education professor at the time. His friend’s family fought against the stupidity as well. It was no use. The superindent simply recited the letter of the zero tolerance policy back to anyone that dared challenge her.

It still worked out fine. My little brother started community college instead of his senior year and ended up a good school. Oddly enough, he is a police officer now.

Yes, the kids were, for the most part, shocking themselves. It’s actually kind of hard to shock someone else with the pen. And it doesn’t hurt at all, it just makes your hand vibrate and startles you. “Electrocute”? Oh :rolleyes: PUHLEEEEZE. And DtC: The teachers and administrators are the ones who tell me that Dominic is picked on, not him. They see it first hand. He’s one of those “easy target” kids and they tease him until he cries on a regular basis. His TEACHER told me this, and it’s the same thing teachers have told me before. So yeah, I believe it. The fight was because kids were telling him he was gay in the lunch line and then pushed him. He pushed back. The lunchroom staff saw it and said he didn’t start it.

Oh and DtC? I’m glad you’re not a teacher anymore. People who are so quick to judge based on thinking they “know the type” without having actual facts specific to the situation are exactly the personality types who should NEVER be in a position of authority, especially around kids.

I can see how the principal would like zero-tolerance, it means she doesn’t have to think or do any work when doling out punishment. No worries about punishments fitting the crimes because she can hide behind district policy. Very convinient, I’m sure. :rolleyes: Coward

That’s exactly what I told my mom. Zero Tolerance is a cop-out so the school doesn’t have to actually think and make decisions and have responsibility. It’s also these kinds of one-size-fits-all punishments that leads kids to believe that actual consequences are arbitrary and they might as well go all out if they’re just going to be punished “for the worst” anyway.

When I was a teacher, I knew the kid and I usually saw what happened. I didn’t have to rely on knowing the type.
Maybe in your case I reacted too strongly or made biased assumptions from past experience. I don’t actually know what a “shock pen” is, I assumed it was some kind of taser. If it’s just a toy, then I apologize. I thought it was a weapon.

Ah. In this case, you may find it helpful to click on the link OpalCat provided in the OP.

Well I linked to one so people would see what I was referring to. (The one he had isn’t the same one as on that page, but it’s the same idea. Scroll to the bottom of the page, it’s on the last row.)

It’s one of those gags that you buy at a place like Spencer’s. It’s the same thing as those joy buzzers people hide in their palm and then shake someone’s hand and it gives them a mild shock. It’s a silly little toy.

Edited to add: I accept your apology.