Shaving

[Du_Hast]

Am I the only one who absolutely HATES doing this? Seriously, I'm at the age where I can't grow a decent beard, but if I don't shave, it's noticeable and looks really stupid.

I really do hope one day the Taliban's scraggly, unkept beards become fashionable, just so I can get a year of nonshaving paradise in.

[Drastic]

If I could simply shut off my face follicles (without paying some person armed wth a laser doohicky several hundred dollars), I would do so happily.

All in all, a body could be much more user-friendly and configurable. I'm going to have some strong words for the design team after I finish the test of the current build.

[Cat Whisperer]

Boo-frickin'-hoo - men complaining about shaving. Do you guys realize that you shave about a twentieth of the total area that women are expected to keep completely smooth and hairless?

"Oh, but our faces are so sensitive..." - and our bikini lines and underarms aren't?

"Oh, but we get ingrown follicles under our chins that hurt..."
Yeah, and folded skin like the bikini line doesn't. Mmmm-hmmmm.

I'll give you one point - you can see your face every day, and we can cover our legs and underarms if we're a little too au naturel on any given day. Of course, this also means that we spend a lot of time in long-sleeve shirts and long pants when we would dearly love to be in short shorts and a halter top.

(I'm a natural brunette with nice, thick, dark hair from the top of my head to my toes - literally. This may be a bit of a hot button for me.)

[Atreyu]

I fully acknowledge that the gals have a lot more acreage to shave than us guys.

That still doesn't keep me from wishing I didn't have to shave. I consider it time stolen from me every morning. If I know I don't have to go anywhere on a particular day, I simply skip the shave.

I'll get in line behind Drastic to file a complaint...and what the hell is the evolutionary point behind guys having beards but women not having beards?

[Cat Whisperer]

Oooh, another hot button. Women don't have beards? Have you ever seen a post-menopausal woman in an unbleached, unplucked, unlasered state? I'm 35 now, and I have a mustache and beard that a 16 year old boy would envy, that I pluck and bleach and wax all the frinkin' time. (Oops, think I just slipped into TMI territory.)

(And I concede the point that everyone who wants to can hate shaving just as much as I do. No matter how much real estate they have to shave.)

[Slip Mahoney]

Somebody did this a while back. I remembered reading a while ago so I did a search.

Here it is:

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...I+Hate+Shaving

I'm with ya. Whoever invented shaving should be cut up in pieces and fed to the dogs.

[Drastic]

Well, framed as a contest, you certainly win.

I'm still going to lodge a long complaint form with the design team. Shaving's a minor bullet point with the individual wetware build I'm tasked with a lifetime test of, but I want to be thorough. Did you know that squid eyeballs have their retinas anchored in a much stronger fashion than mammal eyeballs? Flatly absurd; the different departments just don't communicate. And it requires too much downtime between activity cycles, the memory function, well sure it's remarkably powerful and robust, but I would think that could be achieved with far less loss of precision, and with accessibility that worked consistently.

They'll probably just file the report in the trashcan, too, or heavily edit it to make all the comments positive. Damn marketers.

[Odesio]

Originally posted by Du_Hast
Am I the only one who absolutely HATES doing this? Seriously, I'm at the age where I can't grow a decent beard, but if I don't shave, it's noticeable and looks really stupid.

I really do hope one day the Taliban's scraggly, unkept beards become fashionable, just so I can get a year of nonshaving paradise in.

Well I don't think I'd wanta scraggly beard but I understand your feelings about shaving. I remember when I was 13 thinking how cool it was going to be when I could shave. Now I'm 26 and I still can't grow a decent beard in a short period of time. Which I find odd considering how hairy I am everywhere else.

If I could grow a good beard I probably would and then I'd just keep it neatly trimmed.

Marc

[Soul Brother Number Two]

when my wife and i got serious, i said to her, 'um, dont shave on my account.'

she hasnt for 11 years.

[The Griffin]

She must look like Santa Claus by now!!!

[WillGolfForFood]

I'm at the age where I can't grow a decent beard

Do me a favor and let me know when that age ends. I'm 54 and I still can't grow a decent beard. And now some of the stray patches that show up here and there come in grey. Sheesh.

(OTOH, I hear that non-hairy chests are sexy. AHA- at last I'm trendy!)

[Jonny T]

Meh. I don't bother - never gave it a second thought growing up. I've probably shaved 3 times in total.

The odd thing is that the beard I have now seems to be a goatee that changed its mind. And looks vaguely Evil. Fun for scaring children and small animals

Jonny T.

[Coldfire]

"The human body needs a lot of maintenance, a lot of showering, a lot of shaving, a lot of cleaning, a lot of clipping, a lot of checking... If your body was a car, you wouldn’t buy it."
-- Jerry Seinfeld

[Aspidistra]

Originally posted by The Griffin
She must look like Santa Claus by now!!!

You think not shaving's wierd? And you're posting from Scotland?! Why on earth would any sane woman shave in a climate where none of the results would ever be seen except for about 10 minutes in June or July when the sun comes out, looks around a bit, then says 'Aah, fuckit, I'm off to Majorca'.

::shakes head in disbelief::

[Soul Brother Number Two]

Originally posted by The Griffin
She must look like Santa Claus by now!!!

i dont get it.

[JocoseBanter]

Originally posted by The Griffin
She must look like Santa Claus by now!!!

[list=1][*]Witty SDMB post -- Check![*]Spit all over monitor -- Check![/list=1]
Wow, I'm starting to feel like I belong.

Yes, this list does have only two items and is entirely devoid of pigment enhanced felines.

[PosterChild]

y'all'll probably hate me but I no longer mind shaving much. I used to hate it and did it as little as possible, but for the last couple months, I've had to shave every day except for 3 or 4 and I find that it doesn't hurt anymore unless I stop for a day or 2. Some things that make it go more smoothly: shave in the shower at the end- makes a huge difference. (get a mirror, a little soap will keep it unfogged to shave), change blades frequently, and I really like the Mach3 (despite it's stupid name). Also, until you get used to it, don't shave directly up first, shave sideways or an an angle up.

Happy shaving.

PC

[LorieSmurf]

Originally posted by essvee
when my wife and i got serious, i said to her, 'um, dont shave on my account.'

she hasnt for 11 years.

<Sigh> I would love to not have to shave. But it's so totally some thing a woman has to do now for social acceptance. Yeesh. People get grossed out over simple things...a woman with hair in her armpits, a woman with hair on her legs, a woman with hair in her hoohah area. It's freakin' body hair. What the hell's wrong with body hair?????!!!!!!

I should rebel and not shave anything, and see what happens. See if my husband says "Ewwwww!" and divorces me. I should wear a BIKINI in the damn SUMMER, with hair hanging out EVERYWHERE and see how many people VOMIT when they see me!!!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!





ahem. Sorry. Got a a little carried away. Back to the, uh, discussion

[sturmhauke]

I'm genetically incapable of growing a decent beard. Most of the men in my family on both sides have very little facial hair. Mine grows in very distinct patches, and in weird directions.

[LouisB]

I second the notion of shaving in the shower. I have been doing that for years, and without the hassle of a mirror. I also brush my teeth while in the shower so I guess I kill several stones with one bird.

[nightshadea]

I have too much hair ,,,,,, I cant ever get rid of it

Being clean shaven for me is the 5 o clock shadow is as short as possible

If i could shave my self which with hand problems it extra difficult Its a everyday thing

My family jokes on the male side when our tribe evolved from the apes we kept the hair


But I'm probably one of a few males that will be glad when he goes bald

Of course knowing my luck it will just all turn gray ......

[Mangetout]

Originally posted by featherlou
(I'm a natural brunette with nice, thick, dark hair from the top of my head to my toes - literally.

My, that must take a while to shave; do you get somebody else to shave your back or are you double-jointed?

::d&r::

[kabbes]

Electric razor (yes it isn't as good, but who gives flying fuck?) on the bog straight before having a shower. I lose very little time and post-shower don't feel any ill-effects. I recommend this simple little practice.

Still frickin' annoying, mind.

Not as bad as ::shudder:: nostril hair mind you.

pan

[Cat Whisperer]

Originally posted by Mangetout
My, that must take a while to shave; do you get somebody else to shave your back or are you double-jointed?

::d&r::

Hey, if nobody's seeing my back, I ain't making the effort. Maybe I should just stop shaving altogether and pretend I'm wearing fur pantyhose.

[Legomancer]

I hate shaving. I put it off as long as I can, but eventually I look like I'm pursely going for a Don Johnson look, so I do it then.

[Soul Brother Number Two]

hey superlorie. go for it. its very freeing, according to my wife. i have always been astonished at the number of dopers that shave their bikini lines and such. seems to me it must be unpleasant as hell. ive never been with someone who did that.

for the record, i dont have some kind of fetish thing going here. its just that she didnt like doing it, and after a while the act seemed just plain weird to me. i actually felt guilty and thought 'geez, i hope shes not doing it because of me...' turns out she was.

[Soul Brother Number Two]

also for the record, i dislike shaving a great deal and keep a full beard. i have the barber trim it way down when i remember, and i dont shave my neck or my cheeks. its not sexy, its animal!

[pendgwen]

Originally posted by SuperLorie


<Sigh> I would love to not have to shave. But it's so totally some thing a woman has to do now for social acceptance. Yeesh.

I tend to think that anyone who is going to judge me solely on whether I shave my legs isn't someone whose opinion I am terribly worried about. If they are so totally unable to deal with minor social nonconformity that's their problem not mine.

[catsix]

I like to shave. I feel all ooky and gross when I have hair all over my legs and pits and cooch. I despise stubble, I feel even worse if it's long, and as for having a hairy bikini area - forget it. Sex isn't nearly as good as when things are all smooth and sensitive.

I guess I'm about the only person here who sees it as something I do to enjoy my own body more, and not some godawful chore that's been foisted upon me by a patriarchal society with warped ideas of what a woman should look like.

Oh well, people can keep figuring that I'm so totally seeking social acceptance, or they can mind their own business and leave me to my razor so that I can enjoy my sex life as much as is humanly possible. It's not being a 'conformist' if you really enjoy what you're doing.

[Gary Kumquat]

You know, I actually don't mind shaving. I've got two different routines for it:

1) The daily - standard safety razor, in the shower, no mirror takes about 2 minutes tops. The steam from the shower softens your stubble nicely, so it really takes no time.

2) The going out shave - a straight razor I inherited from my grandfather, a kent shaving brush, and shaving soap from Taylors of London. More a ritual preparing for a night of debauchery than anything else, this takes about ten minutes, and requires a fair amount of concentration if I don't want to remove my chin with a poorly aimed stroke of the blade.

[Tansu]

Women who shave their legs have a larger area to shave, but the density of hair per cm² is much less, and it matters less if we miss a bit.

Occasionally I have bizarre recurring "beard dreams" where I dream I have sufficient facial hair to justify shaving my face. In the dreams I'm usually horrified by it, especially when I realise that after shaving I'm doomed to stubble. I think it's some strange gender insecurity thing.

[Cervaise]

I have a goatee not because it's trendy or looks good, but because I find it an enormous hassle shaving around my chin and lips. I'm willing to shave my cheeks and neck in the name of civilization, but no more.

Of course, the time I save in not shaving parts of my face is dedicated to trimming back my pubic hair...

[Podkayne]

I'm pretty conflicted about my leg hair. I think sometimes I would feel more socially comfortable and confident if I just shaved it off, but then I think of all the hassle I would have to go through. I hate stubble, so when I am shaving, I'm really obsessive about it. Usually practicality wins out.

Most men I've dated have told me that they actually like the leg hair because it's different. On the other hand, I notice people staring at it all the time.
The creepiest thing is that when I see a woman with hairy legs, my first, instinctive, gut-level reaction is always negative.

And I think armpit hair (on men, too) is gross. That's a tiny bit of real estate, though, so I don't mind keeping my pits shaved.

*Sigh* Just color me a victim of the patriarchy.

[iampunha]

I think I've shaved five times in my life, and two of them were because I wanted to.

People don't comment either out of being nice and pretending not to notice, or outright not noticing. I'm really un-hairy, so I'm guessing the latter.

[Medea's Child]

I shave my legs when I have time and they are going to be seen.

Summer.

Stubble sucks but I don't mind the opposite ends of the spectrum, so when I'm shaving, I shave obsessively.

[FallenAngel]

Color me weird, but I actually enjoy shaving. It's kind of ritualistic and focusing, with a vague Zen feel. Then again, I've been called a fool and a dangerous person in the last few days; so this may just be evidence of my psychopathy.

[OpalCat]

I hate body hair on a woman, but I also hate shaving. Since I've gained weight, I've stopped shaving my pubes (only because I can't see them anymore and I don't wanna do that "by feel")... but I've never been real big on leg or armpit shaving. Even when I was dancing I would wear thigh high boots or stockings so you couldn't tell. I did shave my armpits then... and I still prefer them shaved... but I don't do it regularly. My legs I get waxed once or twice a year, and the rest of the time they're au naturale. If someone finds me socially unacceptable they are invited to bite me.

And yes I wear dresses and shorts and stuff. People can either deal with it or not--their choice.

[butter pie]

I should rebel and not shave anything, and see what happens. See if my husband says "Ewwwww!" and divorces me. I should wear a
BIKINI in the damn SUMMER, with hair hanging out EVERYWHERE and see how many people VOMIT when they see me!!!

This is the funniest thing I have read in a long, long time.

I like to shave. I feel all ooky and gross...

I agree. I shave pretty much my entire body below the neck, arms included. It takes me about 15 full minutes to go through the whole ordeal, but it feel so good afterwards. Like a dolphin or something.