What do you think?
I don’t know much about their advertising, but I do know that Gillette is a bitch to work with. How many production tracking forms do they freaking well need, anyway?
Because why?
Because they are always stupid and corny. They make razors out to be the center of a man’s universe. It’s patronizing. It’s just a f*****g razor!
Give them a break. They’re only trying to plug their product.
Male “performance enhancers,” OTOH, should be banned from the airwaves immediately.
Nothing against people plugging their product (except a general dislike of the way advertising is conducted in today’s world) but don’t you think they overdo it? Thay make each advert seem like they’ve just invented time-travel or something like that.
You thought the last couple bitches about Gilette razor commercials were the ultimate in pointing out advertising idiocy, right?
The commercial-bashing action is increased 150 million percent. This thread is dedicated to mocking Gilette’s advertising. The first post sets you up for the ultimate Gilette-hating experience. The second prepares you for a different perspective. The third prompts you to think about the commercials. The fourth reinforces the idea that this thread is founded on. You’ll come out of this thread with the closest, purest form of Gilette hatred known to the hatred of man. Female psychoanalysts will flock to you to rub their hands over your smooth smooth mental problems. Be prepared.
I dunno. I kinda LIKE Smiling Bob.
(Unless he started working for another company…Isuzu perhaps?)
My gillete has a 4 turbos and 100000000000000000000 mach speed and can travel through time. I practically wake up and don’t have to shave, it’s gone already! So the ads are kinda close.
Time travel? Is that it? Ha! My razor brings me breakfast in bed!
Oh, come on. How can you take a razor commercial at all seriously when it begins,
“There is a force out there so powerful you would do anything to have it…”
And the force in question is a slightly vibrating blade?
No, the ads are accurate.
When I shave, I am not in a suburban bathroom, bleary-eyed and hungover. No siree, I am dogfighting in a fighter jet.
When I drink beer, I’m not flopped in front of the TV in my smelly work clothes. Uh uh, I am in fact toasting beautiful women on my luxury yacht, having spent the day excelling at a multitude of extreme sports.
No, really.
You can keep your dumb old Gillette. [I’ve got shampoo that give me orgasms!
Wait…Isn’t that what the new, battery-powered Gilette is really for?
Just make sure you take the cartridge off first.
(Death of a thousand cuts, indeed.)
I’m actually a beta-tester for Gillette, and while I’m not supposed to say anything (according to my non-disclosure agreement), I’m actually testing a new razor, set for release just before Christmas 2005 that
[ul]
[li]Has eight blades that automatically rotate after each use upon the press of a button to ensure maximum blade sharpness and life[/li][li]auto-cleans via supersonic mechanisms I don’t fully understand[/li][li]Applies shaving foam directly to my face as I shave, thus no longer require a can of lube on the counter[/li][li]head rotates not only up and down and side to side to ensure maximum coverage with minimal abrasion, but also into the dimension of time, just in case I forgot to shave this morning[/li][li]includes an optional Metrosexual feature that reduces the appearance of lines in my face (lines not actually reduced), transdermally applies a Vitamin E complex that causes me to appear 12.2 years younger than my actual age (YMMV), and automatically orders tickets to the ballet[/li][/ul]
Optional features include a Fellatiotamer (not sure what it does) and an attachment that gets me a roast beef sandwich and a beer. I haven’t tried this stuff yet, but the literature refers to the Fellatiotamer/sandwich maker combination as “a complete woman replacement system”. I don’t know what that means, but will let you know when I receive the Lifestyle Enhancement Package that contains these extra features.
The razor of the future will have seven thousand blades and will be too heavy to lift; in order to shave, the user will have to move his lathered face back and forth across it. The advertising slogan will be:
"A shave so close, you can see the white gleam of exposed bone and the splash of bright, arterial blood"
That’s what a straight razor is for, mate!
I think stupid ads have a place in the world: they provide us with funny ads making fun of them!
Gillette should be allowed to make ads.
What it should not be allowed to do is make one really poor ad, seemingly in Germany or Austria, and then dub it really badly into English and inflict it on us.
Hey cool, the world turned upside down! Now you know what Hollywood films are like in Germany! 