One of my giddy, guilty pleasures is reading the new tract from Jack Chick. After his last twofer, Squatters and The Little Bride, I had expected more Muslim baiting but there was only a tangential reference to children being kidnapped for Saudi Arabia which is pretty mild for Jack.
The subplot involves Huge black cop™, (no first name given) Carter from The Peacemaker, responding to a domestic violence dispute. His reaction to walking into a woman beating her husband in the head with the spike heel of a shoe is to say “lady stop!..” while standing in the doorway. Does he draw his weapon when walking into one of the most dangerous situations for a police officer? No. Is it just me or is Carter not a very good cop? Apparently his department’s SOP is to use a firm voice rather than pepper spray, Tasers, batons, choke holds and a fucking gun in this situation. He calms them down and leaves them to their business as long as they forgive each other. WTF? Is there a jurisdiction in America where a domestic violence call doesn’t require that at least one party going to jail? Anyone want to take odds that the next time the police are called to this address that one of the family members is going to the morgue. “Yes officer, we’ll be good.” “We’re going back to church and make you proud of us.” John the baptists on a fucking rubber crutch, how gullible is this cop?
The main plot is L’il Holly, fresh from having converted her friend Donna, who is kidnapped by a swarthy guy, as we are lead to believe for export to Saudi Arabia. She is saved when Jesus tells her to yell and pound on the trunk lid of the car she is trapped inside. Huh. Well that is pretty sensible advice. Way to go Jesus. I’ll leave it to other theologians if our lord would have also advised L’il Holly to claw the assailants’s eyes and kick him in the nuts as hard as she can.
I just read it, and I dunno. It’s so mild sompared to his more recent work, I’m tempted to think he was lobotomized, castrated or something. Are you sure it isn’t a re-release of an older piece? Or maybe now it’s Jack Chick ™.
It’s just so unfocused. Saudi kidnappers, lying little girls, spousal abuse and somehow we’re supposed to believe that this is all god’s fault…wait…I must be missing something…
Is it just me, or does Carter look a lot like OJ? And while this was exceedingly lame as Chick tracts go, I did get a chuckle out of Carter saying that he wanted to “nail” the kidnappers. Cause, you know, when I think of someone getting “nailed” I don’t think about them being arrested. . .
that was horrible… not near enough bible quotes and looked completely diffrent than most of my fave tracts. maybe jacks finally mellowed out? good god i hope not, i need the laughs… ah well theres always the archives…
So it wasn’t just me, it sort of was a disjointed mess.
Isn’t that the same cop who broke the gang by converting them? I like teh how proffesional that police chief seems. With no evidence he proclaims the girls are on their way to Mexico for the Saudis. Nothing like indirectly calling Muslims child molesters eh Jack?
And for a cop he sure can take or leave his job can’t he? I mean it is a domestic dispute he walks in and sees the assault happeneing and he preaches to them?!? Sorry bud but you have to make an arrest, just because they repent doesn’t mean you can let them go.
“Who needs chrch we’ve got TV”
Jack has lost his edge, now instead of being a huge nut he’s become a senile dotering incoherant Uncle.
“You kids have to learn about… er um… you know there are evil… uh… In my day I… POUNDCAKE!!!..I think I need to be changed.”
