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  #1  
Old 03-02-2005, 10:11 PM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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Your worst childhood photo.

I there's no hiding that I was an ugly kid. Really, I was a very ugly kid. this ugly. That's me at 11 years old.

What's up with the hair? I think I was trying to grow it out, but I don't know what's going on with the random wings everywhere. And that smile. I look like a Cabbage Patch Kid.

And WTF is going on with that sweater? Are those CAMELS? And ELEPHANTS??? Gotta love the colour, too. Is there a name for that? Only baby poop comes to mind. And I love the turquoise socks with the duck boots. I was a big.frickin.fashion.plate. No wonder I was a target for bullies.

Okay, I revealed this horror to you all. Have you got a childhood photo that you truly can't stand?
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  #2  
Old 03-02-2005, 10:15 PM
Fritz Fritz is offline
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Don't have a photo to post, but I do have one word...

Lederhosen.

'nuff said.
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  #3  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:11 PM
Zsofia Zsofia is offline
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There's one of me about a minute old, screaming and bloody. I'm not really happy about that one.

And then, every picture taken between, say, age 7 and age 21. And most of them after that. I was an extremely cute kid, but a wretchedly ugly adolescent. I still don't photograph well, but am told I am quite attractive, nowadays.
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  #4  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:25 PM
Jenaroph Jenaroph is offline
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I'm not posting my 8th grade school photo. Ugly sweater, ugly haircut, big huge ugly 80's-style glasses, and so much metal glued to my teeth it's a wonder I could close my lips around it all. Yuuckh. I'm smiling, but I don't look happy; I look like I just bit into a handful of Hershey's Kisses without taking the tinfoil off first.
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  #5  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:26 PM
pinkfreud pinkfreud is offline
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This is my least favorite photo of my youth. I hate the cat-eye glasses. I hate the attempted bouffant hairdo. I hate the memory of having been a pathetic nerdette who didn't get asked on a date until college.
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  #6  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:45 PM
Tuckerfan Tuckerfan is offline
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I don't have a copy of the photo, but does the phrase "pink leisure suit" mean anything to you?
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  #7  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:47 PM
NinjaChick NinjaChick is offline
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Blah. I have no non-awful childhood pictures. I was horribly cross-eyed as a kid. Short and pudgy. With bad hair and bad clothes.

I'm not bitter, though...
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  #8  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:49 PM
matt_mcl matt_mcl is offline
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There is a school photo circa grade 3 that involves a self-inflicted haircut.

Down the memory hole.
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  #9  
Old 03-02-2005, 11:49 PM
Stuffy Stuffy is offline
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There is a picture of my brothers, sister and I, that I have promised to set fire to, if given a moment alone with it. It was taken mid-summer of my 11th year. All of us must have been playing in the vacant lot across the street from our house (Detroit). We were all wearing cut-offs and tanktops, we were dusty, hair unkempt (and we all had afros) and skinny. Except for the pot bellies, we could have been poster childs for one of those "just $0.10 a day wil help feed, clothe.." commercials.

Guess what photo my Mom drug out when she met my wife.
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  #10  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:24 AM
Cunctator Cunctator is offline
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I have a lovely photograph taken just after my confirmation (in 1973). I'm standing with my hands clasped in prayer, and looking very pious. Unfortunately I'm also wearing purple flairs, a tight paisley shirt and a hideous shaggy haircut.

It really was the decade without taste.
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  #11  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:33 AM
FilmGeek FilmGeek is offline
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When I was 9 or so I was playing football in the yard with my brother. I fell and hit my chin on the driveway, scraping out a big chunk, a week before picture day.

Worse than the huge oozing scab on my face, I was wearing a purple polo and rainbow suspenders.
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  #12  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:57 AM
Sternvogel Sternvogel is offline
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When I was about 11 years old, my sister (two years younger than I) got a camera for Christmas. She was walking around the house taking pictures, and decided to open the bathroom door and snap a photo of me as I was in the bathtub. The view of my naked backside was developed and returned without any problems -- of course, that was the early 1970's. Today, a similar shot would probably be seized as evidence in a child pornography case. Although I'd consider that judicial overkill, I wouldn't mind having my sister brought up even today on charges of "causing abject embarrassment" or something of that nature. Of course, even if such a law were passed, it wouldn't be made retroactive. Just my luck...
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  #13  
Old 03-03-2005, 01:14 AM
Grrr! Grrr! is offline
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My mother was telling me when I was just an infant I was fat and a TOTAL pig. The nurses even had to take my bottle away fromme just to keep from eating too much!

Anyway my mom took a picture of me once sitting outside on our front yard, I was eating a snicker bar with chocolate ALL over my face. And to make matters worse I was soo fat that I couldn't sit up on my own. So when they took the picture my mom had to keep her hand on my back to keep he from falling back ovver.

(I was old enough that I should have learned to sit up on my own long ago)
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  #14  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:53 AM
Blalron Blalron is offline
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There's a picture of me at nine years old in a Speedo.
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  #15  
Old 03-03-2005, 03:31 AM
nocturnal_tick nocturnal_tick is offline
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Lessee. I had no fashion sense until the age of 14/15 so there's plenty of me in rainbow striped t-shirts.

And for a while I had long hair. Which I used to gel...

...I think I burned all of those.
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  #16  
Old 03-03-2005, 03:46 AM
Iceland_Blue Iceland_Blue is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amazon Floozy Goddess
I there's no hiding that I was an ugly kid. Really, I was a very ugly kid. this ugly. That's me at 11 years old.

What's up with the hair? I think I was trying to grow it out, but I don't know what's going on with the random wings everywhere. And that smile. I look like a Cabbage Patch Kid.

And WTF is going on with that sweater? Are those CAMELS? And ELEPHANTS??? Gotta love the colour, too. Is there a name for that? Only baby poop comes to mind. And I love the turquoise socks with the duck boots. I was a big.frickin.fashion.plate. No wonder I was a target for bullies.

Okay, I revealed this horror to you all. Have you got a childhood photo that you truly can't stand?
Have you considered quite how much like Little Jimmy Osmond you look in that pic?
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  #17  
Old 03-03-2005, 05:39 AM
sweetfreak sweetfreak is offline
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I don't have any pics of me as a kid that I can post here, but picture this:

Pink plaid pants.

Nuff said.
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  #18  
Old 03-03-2005, 06:15 AM
ShibbOleth ShibbOleth is offline
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There is a picture of me somewhere, wearing the bad colors and clothing of 1969 (or so) in which I have the mumps. So my neck is swollen as if I have swallowed a small basketball. Other than that I was a fairly cute kid.
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  #19  
Old 03-03-2005, 06:21 AM
Oregon sunshine Oregon sunshine is offline
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Awwwwww, Amazon, you were cute!! If you look even cuter now, that doesn't make you ugly back then.
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  #20  
Old 03-03-2005, 07:54 AM
emekthian emekthian is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkfreud
This is my least favorite photo of my youth. I hate the cat-eye glasses. I hate the attempted bouffant hairdo. I hate the memory of having been a pathetic nerdette who didn't get asked on a date until college.
I would've asked you on a date! You look cute in that picture.
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  #21  
Old 03-03-2005, 08:23 AM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceland_Blue
Have you considered quite how much like Little Jimmy Osmond you look in that pic?
Ugggh! bluggggghhh! Ahhhh, I do! That's.....horrible!!

pinkfreud, that's a darling picture. I don't think you look any different from any other photos I've seen of girls in that era.
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  #22  
Old 03-03-2005, 08:25 AM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ggurl
Awwwwww, Amazon, you were cute!! If you look even cuter now, that doesn't make you ugly back then.
Thanks, but tell that to the boys in my class back then! They sure didn't think I was cute, and they let me know it, many times. Little beasts. At least I know how to dress now, anyway.
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  #23  
Old 03-03-2005, 08:39 AM
Dung Beetle Dung Beetle is offline
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I'm not too proud of the one Mom took the day I found the brown clay/fingerpaint/foodstuff in my diaper. But at least I was a baby then!

In my 9th grade school yearbook picture, I was wearing a turquoise and red striped polo shirt (ugh!), had a very short self-inflicted haircut, and was wearing earrings which closely resembled bloated turquoise-colored plastic ticks hanging from my ears.
After that year, I moved away, then came back as a senior (much improved). Imagine my horror when my new friends got out their old yearbooks and realized who I was!
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  #24  
Old 03-03-2005, 08:49 AM
dearissues dearissues is offline
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Not my worst , but definitely a bad one. Taken at the happiest moment of my highschool life - I was finally dancing with my crush, and I looked like crap (I'm the girl).
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  #25  
Old 03-03-2005, 10:01 AM
Winnie Winnie is offline
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My ninth grade picture in 1988. I have crimped hair, a red cable-knit crew-neck sweater, and braces ONLY on my top teeth. Man, what a sex kitten I was.
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"You don't sound like you're very happy! I'll teach you to be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs! It's the little critters of nature! They don't know that they're ugly! That's very funny! A fly marrying a bumblebee! I told ya I'd shoot, but ya didn't believe me! WHY DIDN'T YOU BELIEVE ME!!!"
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  #26  
Old 03-03-2005, 10:08 AM
Dorjän Dorjän is offline
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Heh. Y'all shole was ugly. I don't know exactly why I 'm doing this, but here you go.

I was in the 8th grade and just received a science award. I had it all. Ugly sweater with sleeves that are too short? Check. Highwater pants? Check. Ugly tennis shoes with extra long laces? Check. Why was I even WEARING high top tennis shoes w/ that outfit? Oversized glasses? Check.

But look how proud my mom was of me!

Ah good times, good times.
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  #27  
Old 03-03-2005, 10:41 AM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorjän
Heh. Y'all shole was ugly. I don't know exactly why I 'm doing this, but here you go.

I was in the 8th grade and just received a science award. I had it all. Ugly sweater with sleeves that are too short? Check. Highwater pants? Check. Ugly tennis shoes with extra long laces? Check. Why was I even WEARING high top tennis shoes w/ that outfit? Oversized glasses? Check.

But look how proud my mom was of me!

Ah good times, good times.
Jeez, Dorjan, did our moms shop at the same sweater store? That sweater...looks like it was made out of a Persian rug. I don't think I've ever seen a pattern like that on a sweater. Sorry dude. But that PATTERN....

(you were cute, though. )
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  #28  
Old 03-03-2005, 10:43 AM
Dorjän Dorjän is offline
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Actually, I think I picked out that sweater.

I blame it on the 80's.
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  #29  
Old 03-03-2005, 11:24 AM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorjän
Actually, I think I picked out that sweater.

I blame it on the 80's.
The 80's weren't as cruel as the 70's for clothes, but there was still a lot of stuff that hurt.

I remember wearing stirrup pants. With velcro sneakers. That was pretty bad.
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  #30  
Old 03-03-2005, 11:37 AM
Zebra Zebra is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkfreud
This is my least favorite photo of my youth. I hate the cat-eye glasses. I hate the attempted bouffant hairdo. I hate the memory of having been a pathetic nerdette who didn't get asked on a date until college.

I too, find this photo of you oddly compelling. You are just really attractive in this picture.


My worst picture, well it would take a huge team of photo experts to sort through them all to choose only one, but the first photo ever taken of me is really bad. I'm lying in the little crib, with the little sign saying Baby Boy Zebra ect. I'm crying. Oh and it looks like I have a 'loaded' diaper and yes the leg has gapped open and is showing it.


Trust me, they went downhill from there.
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  #31  
Old 03-03-2005, 11:43 AM
Zsofia Zsofia is offline
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It's funny, I think everybody who's posted a picture was really cute (if sartorally challenged). I especially like the cats eye glasses.

If you guys are lucky I'll find a school picture or two when I get home. 80's perm, Coke bottle glasses, creative orthodontistry, and truly tragic fashion sense. The thing is, it wasn't fashionable then either - I also didn't get any dates until college.
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  #32  
Old 03-03-2005, 11:50 AM
JSexton JSexton is offline
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This picture isn't really that bad, except for some truly hideous pants. Hey, it was 1979.

There are worse pictures, of course, but I don't seem to have any of them on the computer.

I can't imagine why.
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  #33  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:35 PM
cher3 cher3 is offline
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Hey, JSexton, you look just like my son at that age. If you were my son, though, that camera would be in numerous pieces. And not the pieces it is supposed to be in, either.
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  #34  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:46 PM
JSexton JSexton is offline
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Originally Posted by cher3
Hey, JSexton, you look just like my son at that age. If you were my son, though, that camera would be in numerous pieces. And not the pieces it is supposed to be in, either.
Heh. If it were MY camera, it probably would be thoroughly disassembled. That one didn't belong to us, though. My father makes underwater housings for cameras. This shot is from his website.
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  #35  
Old 03-03-2005, 12:48 PM
iampunha iampunha is offline
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I was not entirely pleased.

Not the worst, but I do not exactly have boxes of old photos around.
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  #36  
Old 03-03-2005, 01:03 PM
JSexton JSexton is offline
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Originally Posted by iampunha
I was not entirely pleased.

Not the worst, but I do not exactly have boxes of old photos around.
Angelfire's blocking, so you'll have to cut and paste: http://www.angelfire.com/va2/iampunha1/5thgrade.jpg

I think we would have been friends in grade school.
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  #37  
Old 03-03-2005, 01:58 PM
Roland Orzabal Roland Orzabal is offline
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Pffft. Amateurs.

It's a cellphone picture of a wallet-sized photograph, but it gets the point across. Beige sweater lovingly knitted by Grandma? Check. Half-inch-thick glasses with horn-rim frames? Check. Green-and-white pinstriped shirt with collar sticking out of sweater? Check. Hair longer than shoulder-length? Hard to tell in this pic, but...check.

And this was 1992.

Yeah. I rule. You know it.
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  #38  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:07 PM
TroubleAgain TroubleAgain is offline
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I should try to find the family portrait we had made when I was about 15. My mom didn't tell me we were going until about 15-20 minutes before, and wouldn't let me have time to shower and wash my hair. So....oily hair pulled back off my very high forehead with combs? Check. Braces shining? Check. Overly severe navy dress? Check.


Yech.
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  #39  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:14 PM
Scarlett67 Scarlett67 is offline
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Bah, you people are a bunch of amateurs (and quite attractive too!). I didn't see much wrong with any of your outfits. (Dorjän, you were obviously in the middle of a growth spurt and your proud mom obviously hadn't had time to go shopping for you because she was too busy raising [and feeding!] a smart kid. But I digress.)

Anyway, you people made me haul out my scanner and finally sign up for a Photobucket account just to win this little contest. I actually have two entries because Mr. S and I disagreed on which one was the "best worst."

Submitted for your disapproval:
5th grade (my nomination)
Too-small glasses, perching on the end of the nose? Check.
Shapeless hair with too-long bangs split stupidly down the middle? Check.
Flap from overalls dress (yes, it was a dress) flapping in the breeze? Check.

8th grade (his nomination)
Corny 80's perm? Check.
Huge plastic 80's Coke-bottle glasses? Check.
Zits o'plenty? Check.
Picket-fence teeth one year before the application of orthodontia? Check.
Dorky sweater/shirt combo (yes, that's a fake shirt) with gold threads? Check.
Cheap necklace clasp sticking out? Check.

Neither of those is a genuine smile, just a grimace for the photographer. School didn't give me much reason to smile. Also, consider that these are the best representations of me on film and you can appreciate just how dorky I really was.

By the way, last year Mr. S worked in an elementary school and a girl there looked exactly like me in the 5th grade picture. He says he was extra nice to her. I thanked him on behalf of dorky girls everywhere. We appreciate every bit of positive attention we can get!

(Thank Og I look very little like either of these pictures now. Maturity works wonders.)
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  #40  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:19 PM
Amazon Floozy Goddess Amazon Floozy Goddess is offline
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I almost forgot, there is also the time when I was 14 and decided that I'd treat my poker-straight, shoulder-length hair to a spiral perm. By this age I was also wearing glasses.

I am not kidding when I say that perm and those glasses made me look just like Weird Al Yankovic.
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  #41  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:28 PM
iampunha iampunha is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JSexton
I think we would have been friends in grade school.
Friends? Hell, you look like the brother I might have had.

This would have made us mortal enemies, of course

Scarlett, had you and AFG stayed looking like that - oh, you know what I mean - you'd find your fair share of suitors on this board.
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  #42  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:31 PM
Roland Orzabal Roland Orzabal is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlett67
Submitted for your disapproval:
5th grade (my nomination)
Heh. Look at the pic I just posted. You could've been my sister. Same "tragic flaws" and all.
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  #43  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:50 PM
Batsinma Belfry Batsinma Belfry is offline
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My 6th birthday party. In the picture, all the kids are sitting at the table wearing party hats and confused faces, except for my older sister who's barely able to suppress her laughter. Then there's me at the head of the table, with my mouth wide open, and eyes sqinched shut in anguish. My mom is trying to comfort me while looking at my sister, like she can't believe she spawned such an evil creature.

Seconds before the picture was taken, my sister had informed me that since it was my party, I couldn't participate in the games and fun activities that were lined up for the day.
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  #44  
Old 03-03-2005, 03:36 PM
Susie Derkins Susie Derkins is offline
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Heh, I don't have any of these pictures to scan, but sometime around grade 3 I decided that my photos looked stupid when I smiled. So, practicing in front of the mirror at home, I developed this...face I would make on school picture day: instead of smiling for the camera, I would lightly rest my top teeth against my bottom lip and turn up the corners of my mouth. I looked like I had suddenly come down with a bad case of gas while having tea with my grandmother and I didn't want her to suspect.

Yes, it looked even dumber than it sounds.

I did this for every school picture up until around grade 7. It is so strange to see these pictures of myself, as my facial features were maturing and my hairstyles were changing, but the dumbass look on my face never changed.
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  #45  
Old 03-03-2005, 03:51 PM
Dorjän Dorjän is offline
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Buahaha!

Scarlett, you win. Roland, you are a close runnerup there, with that pic dating 1992!

I'm sure we're all handsome gents and pretty ladies these days.
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  #46  
Old 03-03-2005, 04:20 PM
Burnt Sugar Burnt Sugar is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlett67
Submitted for your disapproval:
5th grade (my nomination)
Too-small glasses, perching on the end of the nose? Check.
Shapeless hair with too-long bangs split stupidly down the middle? Check.
Flap from overalls dress (yes, it was a dress) flapping in the breeze? Check.

8th grade (his nomination)
Corny 80's perm? Check.
Huge plastic 80's Coke-bottle glasses? Check.
Zits o'plenty? Check.
Picket-fence teeth one year before the application of orthodontia? Check.
Dorky sweater/shirt combo (yes, that's a fake shirt) with gold threads? Check.
Cheap necklace clasp sticking out? Check.
His nomination is definitely worse. You look cute in the first one! But, yeah, the second one? I'm glad you said you look different now.
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  #47  
Old 03-03-2005, 04:40 PM
Scarlett67 Scarlett67 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Roland Orzabal
Heh. Look at the pic I just posted. You could've been my sister. Same "tragic flaws" and all.
Did you have the witless, awkward personality to match, too? I sure did.
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  #48  
Old 03-03-2005, 04:49 PM
pinkfreud pinkfreud is offline
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Many thanks to those of you who have said complimentary things about my photo. As I look at it again, I am reminded of the movie Pleasantville. Why, I could have played a geekette who yearned after Tobey Maguire, but ended up going solo to the prom and dancing with other girls.

It always amazes me that some people look back on their youth with nostalgia and sweet memories. I wouldn't relive those years for anything. Being a feeble middle-aged woman isn't so great, but it sure beats being a miserable young one.
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  #49  
Old 03-03-2005, 05:16 PM
monstro monstro is online now
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I wish I had access to my parent's photo album. Boy, do I have some DOOZIES!
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  #50  
Old 03-03-2005, 05:21 PM
iampunha iampunha is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Burnt Sugar
But, yeah, the second one? I'm glad you said you look different now.
I wouldn't mind encountering someone who looked like that and was close to my age...

And all those other applicable disclaimers...
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