Obese Woman Ruins Theatre

The BBQ Pit
1

Went to the theatre last night, what a misfortune! Next seat down from me was an obese woman. I’m talking an OBESE woman. What can you do. I sat in my seat, rather, the bit of my seat she hadnt spilled over into. So, there I am, in utter uncomfort. I wasnt going to complain, even as this woman stuffed her face with chocolate and icecream. I have a lot of sympathy for the obese; it must be terrible to live like that. If I was obese, I’d probably buy two theatre tickets, so I wouldnt ruin someone elses night.

Then, I realised as the show started, she wasnt alone. She was with two other ladies, who were sitting two seats over from her. So it was friend, friend, space, obese lady, bubastis. She was probably waiting for a third friend to take that middle seat, right?

Wrong. The seat in the middle was to give her friends space, so she wouldnt inconvienience them with her size. Very thoughtful of her.

Pity she didnt extend this same thought to the other patrons.

I’m not saying she should have bought three seats for herself, though she needed them… not that I’m trying to be mean, I have a lot of sympathy for the obese; it must be terrible to live like that.

I’m simply wondering if I have any argument at all that she should have taken the middle seat, leaving a space between me and her. Who should she inconvienince, her friends or a stranger? Evidently, a stranger. Why ruin your friends night out? Ruin mine! You dont know me!

It was hell, at least until intermission when she went off to get more snacks. But, the second half of the show went smoothly… She chose to sit IN THE AISLE. Yes, she was that fucking fat. I’m sorry, I didnt mean that; I have a lot of sympathy for the obese; it must be terrible to live like that.

Which brings me to part two of my rant: Should the obese be allowed to create fire hazards in public places?

2

If you were uncomfortable, why didn’t you move yourself?

3

That’s what I was wondering too.

Why would you choose the one seat in the theatre beside that particular woman?

4

This is not going to go well, bubastis.
I hope you brought a sack lunch, because this seige is going to take aaaaaaallll day.

So, you didn’t move because the theater was completely full except for that one seat between her and her friends?
I have to believe that’s what your answer is going to be, because any other answer is going to get your ass handed to you.

Matter of fact, the whole subject is going to get your ass handed to you.

Aaaah, but you’re new at this. Good luck.

5

Oh wait. You’re not new at this. Maybe you’re just dense.

6

I’m certainly not defending bubastis, but I was under the assumption (by his spelling of “theatre”, not “theater”) that this was at an assigned-seat play or musical, not a movie theater. Let’s hope so.

7

I’m wondering if the OP left out any imprtant data. Like the seats for the theater were assigned (as in a play or opera, not a movie).

8

Curse you DooWahDiddy and your ability to sweet talk the hamsters into action while they laught at me! :wink:

9

Maybe he just likes fat chicks.

10

Unless I’m completely misunderstanding the following from the OP, I don’t think there’s any doubt.

This doesn’t make any sense in a theater without assigned seats, correct?

11

I just find the thread title odd. Ruins “theatre” ? I thought this meant the obese woman had leant against a support beam and made the building collapse, or something.

12

Given that there was an intermission, and I’ve never been to a regular movie where there has been an intermission, I’m going to guess it was live theatre with assigned seats.

13

I’ve never heard of live theatre with a snack bar.

14

Odd, they are common enough around here.

15

Our playhouse serves food, but only at intermission, and certainly not ice cream. And you’re not allowed to eat in your seat.

16

Don’t movie theaters in the UK have assigned seating?

17

I went to one that had a smack bar. Every so often, a performer would come down off stage and smack people in the face with it.

The show only played that one night, tho. Pity. I had a big list of people I wanted to take to it.

18

Or it could be that she starred in a movie so magnificent that live theatre just doesn’t cut it anymore.

19

Was it a smash hit?

20

So … Was she hot?