Okay, I’m use to people at work using their Blackberry while sitting on the toliet. But last week I heard someone talking on their cell phone while taking a crap. Now this afternoon I hear someone walk in, talking (about work) on their cell phone, pee at the urinal, flush it, wash their hands, then walk out. All while carrying on the conversation.
Can you please just stop communicating for a moment or two while peeing and shitting? Is it too much to ask that I not have to listen to you when I’m in there concentrating?
When I worked in a call center, some of my co-workers complained about getting calls from guys on cell phones in restrooms. Never women, just men. Usually, they were boorish, demanding pricks who delibrately let the poor phone tech know they were so busy they couldn’t even stop solving problems long enough to take a dump in private. Apparently, it became a problem widespread enough that clients would include it among the acceptable causes for call termination.
I always go out of my way to fart as loud as I can when someone’s in the bathroom talking on a phone.
Something about talking in a public bathroom on a phone is just trashy, and I want to draw attention to it- what better way than a nice loud trouser foghorn?
Assuming you don’t embarass easy, my favorite is to launch into a loud boorish rant about the stupid jerk in the stall talking on his phone. He’s not about to come out, or to shout you down, so why not heap abuse on his sorry ass? Ideally he’s been trying to keep his location & activity a secret from the person on the other end. Blowing his cover to hell is always a nice bonus.
There certainly is and it’s big. She makes a living doing it full time. Not so much in the U.S. but huge in the UK. At least that’s where most of her clients are from.
Actually she works about 30 hours a week and tries to do it when her kiddies are in school.
Crazy, huh! It’s huge and there are waiting lists for jobs. You don’t make nearly the money that you do with phone sex, but you can make money.
Apparently the world runs at too fast a pace for one to even stop and take a crap without being plugged in.
I worked in temp staffing some years ago and contacted an applicant about a job.
Said applicant was at home and answered my phone call - while on the toilet.
Said applicant actually…(major squick-out just recalling it) grunted and I heard distinct ploppage into the commode.
I didn’t offer this applicant the job. I might have caught hell for placing him with the client if he started flinging poo at the office manager or burping during staff meetings. :rolleyes:
I just said I was updating his contact information (stupid, I know…I was calling him, wasn’t I?? :o ) and got the heck off the phone as fast as I could.
A couple of weeks ago, I went into the bathroom at work and a coworker of mine was talking on the phone as she was finishing up her business. It became apparent to me almost instantly that she was speaking to her husband, who also works for our organization. And she stood there and talked to him, while I really had to pee. But I couldn’t stand the idea that he might hear me and idly ask, “So, who was in the bathroom when you called me earlier” and that somehow my peeing would be part of their conversation.
Stupid, I know. They have better things to talk about. Then again, why should I trust that someone who uses a cell phone in the bathroom wouldn’t talk about it?
My supervisor was using her cell phone in the office bathroom (about the size of a phone booth), and accidentally dropped it into the used toilet. She immediately called the company, told them what happened, and demanded a replacement. When they informed her they did not replace phones with “water damage,” she lost it and said “You won’t replace a phone that’s been in a toilet. Well, I’ll just go throw it into the street and run over it with my car. Then will you replace it?” and hung up.
The whole office just cracked up. She reported it stolen, and got her replacement.
It really isn’t just men who make phone calls while on the toilet.
The other day while I was returning some coffee at work I heard a female voice in the next stall talking. She clearly wasn’t talking to me, and there was no one else in the restroom at the time. Then she said ‘I love you, Daddy.’ and flushed.
I was just going to say this. I hear women on their cellphones all the time in our office bathroom. Why do you even think to bring your cellphone in? And why would you answer it if it rings?
Then there are the people who talk incessantly while you or they are in the stall. No, I don’t want to talk to you either. I can talk to you outside.
Delightful though this sounds on paper, a) it’s a good way to drop a phone in your tub, which is not recommended; and b) the placement of said phones strongly suggests they are for your toileting convenience. (Plus, most hotel tubs are small, shallow, and grotty, apparently not intended for bathers.)
This happened to me at work once.
I was in the bathroom, and an older lady and her two grown daughters came in to use the facilities. As I was sitting there minding my own business, I hear one of the daughters begin a phone conversation.
Woman in toilet: Hi Daddy! We’re in Wal-Mart.
Pause
WIT: Yeah we’re in the bathroom.
Pause
WIT: We’re peein’
Pause
Then I hear the hughest fart in the history of flatulence.
thpthpthptphtphpthpthptptpthppth
Wit: Yeah, Mama just farted.
Cut to me in another stall, turning purple, trying not to laugh.
Pause
Wit: No, Daddy we won’t forget your smoke detector.
Me convulsing with silent laughter.
A little while later, they finish their ablutions, and leave.
I leave right after them, and encounter a male co-worker outside the bathroom.
MCO: Did you hear that?!
Me: How did you hear it?
Apparently, the phone conversation came over his walkie-talkie, and customers thought he farted!
Hell, I don’t like to talk to people who are there when I’m in the bathroom.
Here at HQ, we’ve got cellular warriors thick on the ground. We get people talking on their blueteeth everywhere. Gotta keep connected, because the world might just end if you waited a minute and a half to get back to that guy who wanted to talk to you…
I’ll admit to talking while on the crapper on rare occasion.
If I’m expecting a call that I absolutely positively cannot by any stretch miss, I’ll take the handset in there with me. Or if I’m on a really long call (say, with my father, who is constitutionally incapable of carrying on a phone conversation under two hours), and my lower intestine starts a-bubbling and a-percolating away, then I’ll quietly move my location to Porceline World.
But while there, I’ll try my best to make my fecal contributions as discreet as possible. And I will never initiate a call while dropping the kids off at the pool.
